More than an hour after Gavin left, Ella emerged from the shock to discover she was angrier than she could ever recall being with anyone. More than anything, she was confused. She couldn’t sit still, couldn’t stop pacing the length of her small apartment, like a pent-up animal looking for a way to escape its confines.
Except there was no escape from this untenable situation. There was nowhere she could go to hide from her own feelings. But she didn’t have to face them alone. She needed someone who understood Gavin. She needed Hannah. Without a thought to the time, she picked up the phone and called her sister.
Hannah answered on the third ring, sounding sleepy.
“Hannah.”
“Ella?” Now wide awake, Hannah said, “What’s wrong?”
“I know it’s late and you’re tired and pregnant and . . . But could I come over?”
“Of course. Come over. I’ll put on the light.”
“Thanks. I’ll be right there.”
“Are you okay to drive, Ella?”
“Yeah, I’m okay to drive.”
“All right. I’ll see you in a few.”
Ella hung up the phone and ran for her bedroom to pull on yoga pants and an old UVM sweatshirt that dated back to her college days. Jamming her feet into moccasins, she grabbed her purse and keys and was out the door two minutes later. The night was foggy and murky, so she took her time driving to Hannah’s, aware of her own disquiet and not looking to bring any further disaster upon herself by ramming into a tree or a moose.
At some point in the last few months, she’d begun to think of Nolan’s house in the woods as Hannah’s place, too. It had been oddly strange and emotional to help her sister move out of the home she’d shared with Caleb and into her new home with Nolan. She could only imagine what that had been like for Gavin, who’d pitched in with the guys to help move some of the bigger items.
“You’re not thinking about him anymore,” she reminded herself, laughing out loud at the preposterous thought. She’d have to be dead to not think about him anymore.
She pulled up to Hannah and Nolan’s home and cut the engine, taking a second to gather herself before she went inside.
Hannah waited at the door, wrapped up in a plush robe that was tied over her protruding midsection. The first thing Hannah did was hug her. “What’s wrong?”
“He’s an ass.”
“I assume we’re talking about my lovely brother-in-law?”
“Who else?”
“Tell me what happened.”
“Where’s Nolan?”
“Asleep. I wore him out.”
“I’m so sorry to barge in on you guys. I know I got you out of bed—”
“Ella.” Hannah led her to the sofa where they sat together. “Tell me.”
Ella replayed the disastrous presentation of her gift trip to the wedding and told her sister what he’d said and done. By the time she was finished, she had new tears on her cheeks and fresh anger in her heart. “I knew it was a gamble, that he would be worried about work, but for him to end things with me over it. That I just don’t get.”
“He’s running scared, Ella. You caught him off guard, and he’s running.”
“He said he wouldn’t do that. He promised to give us a real, honest chance, and it was going so well. Why would he do this?”
“I don’t know, honey. I honestly don’t know. He’s got all these dark corners inside him that he doesn’t let anyone see. It’s hard to know what goes on in that brain of his.”
“What do I do, Hannah? How do I fix this? I told him we don’t have to go on the trip if he really didn’t want to, but he left saying I deserve better and how he was bound to disappoint me sooner or later, and it was better it happen now. Did he go into this expecting it to end?”