“No problem,” Grant said, shrugging. “Just … I’m sorry in advance if dinner’s weird.”
“I can handle weird,” I said as we walked out to the kitchen table. Grant gave me a worried look as we sat down at a table covered in a faded green-apple tablecloth, with green-apple wallpaper, red-apple place mats, and stickers of apples covering the refrigerator. Plates of collard greens, fried okra, cornbread, and fried catfish steamed as they waited for us to dig in. I grabbed my fork, but Grant touched my arm and slightly shook his head. I started to ask why when Ruby began to say grace.
“Give us, O God, the nourishing meal, well-being to the body, the frame of the soul,” she began, in the low voice of someone reciting poetry. I lowered my utensils and closed my eyes, feeling a tingle at the back of my neck. “Give us, O God, the honey-sweet milk, the sap and the savor of the fragrant farms.”
“That was beautiful,” I said, staring at Ruby. “Is that from the Bible?”
“Don’t know where it’s from. Mama used to say it, and her mama used to say it, so that’s what we say.”
“Well, I think it’s stupid,” Avery said. Grant opened his mouth angrily to chastise her, but Ruby beat him to the punch.
“Now, Avery,” Ruby said, “you know Jesus loves you like you love them dogs and all them chickens and all the birds in the woods. And you love them a lot, don’t you?” Avery nodded. “And lovin’ them like you do, wouldn’t it just hurt your heart to reach out to try and comfort one of those little babies and they scratched your finger?” Avery thought and then nodded more slowly. “Well, that’s what it’s like for Jesus when you say things like that.” Avery’s eyes widened. “You don’t wanna hurt Jesus, do you?”
“No…” Avery said, looking down at her plate. I stared and thought of Dad and all the times he had yelled at me as a kid. For a moment I wished someone had spoken to me like Ruby.
“This all looks so delicious,” I said, picking up my fork again.
“It ain’t nothin’,” Ruby said, waving a hand at me and smiling.
“No, really!” I said. “I haven’t had a meal like this since I moved here. Dad’s not much of a cook.”
“You ain’t from here?” Harper said with a mouth full of cornbread, spraying crumbs across the tablecloth.
“I’m from Tennessee originally,” I said between bites. “But out west near Memphis. Little town about an hour north called Jackson. Then my parents split up and me and Mom settled down just outside Atlanta and Dad moved here.”
“Well, then why’d you come to this shithole if you could’ve stayed someplace like that?” Harper asked.
“Don’t swear at the damn table!” Grant said, rubbing his temple.
“You just swore!” Harper said, banging the table for emphasis.
“Damn! Damn! Damn!” Avery said, giggling and bouncing. Ruby apologized to me, but I could tell she was fading quickly.
“My dad lives here, and I hadn’t seen him in a while,” I said. They talked over me. “Atlanta’s not all that great,” I added, hoping to cut through the conversation. Harper and Grant both gave me a confused look, while Avery’s attention drifted from swearing to poking her food into interesting shapes. “I don’t know. Maybe it is for some people. It wasn’t for me.” I glanced at Grant and squeezed his hand.
“It’s nice that you live with your daddy,” Avery said suddenly, looking at me wistfully. “I miss my daddy.”
Ruby, Harper, and Grant all froze, giving one another a strange look. Grant cleared his throat and silently began clearing plates.
“Avery, shug,” Ruby said, slurring just a little. “Why don’t you go play?”
“Okay, Mama,” Avery said, hopping down from her chair and flopping down near a pile of naked, half-bald Barbie dolls.
“You gonna help or just sit there?” Grant said, poking his head out of the kitchen to glare at Harper. She stuck her tongue out at him and stalked off toward her bedroom.
“Don’t mind her,” Ruby said softly. Her eyes were half-lidded and unfocused. “She always gets upset when people talk about her daddy.”
“Oh,” I said, as I stood and gathered the few remaining plates to help Grant. We hand-washed dishes in silence, him staring off into the distance and me afraid to ask what was going on.
“You ready to go?” he said as he placed the last of the plates in the drying rack.
“Yeah,” I said, and Grant gave me a quick grin.
He kissed his mom on the cheek and headed outside.
“Thanks for dinner,” I said as I picked up my purse. Her eyes fluttered like she was just waking up and she pulled me into a hug. I stiffened at first but quickly hugged her back. She smelled like cigarettes and mint and lemons.
“Thank you,” she said.
“What for?”
“For making my boy smile.”
16