The Sky News reporter, Rachel Lovelock, is reporting a murder: a female victim from Muswell Hill. Perhaps Katie could be a presenter, I think. She’s certainly got the looks. She wouldn’t want to read the news, but a music channel, perhaps, or one of those magazine-style programmes, like Loose Women or The One Show. I pour another glass of water and lean against the worktop as I watch the telly.
The image changes to an outside broadcast; Rachel Lovelock is replaced by a woman in a thick coat, talking earnestly into a microphone. As she carries on talking, a picture of the murder victim appears on the screen. Her name was Tania Beckett, and she doesn’t look much older than Katie, although according to the report she was twenty-five. Her boyfriend raised the alarm when she didn’t come home after work, and she was found in the park late last night, a hundred yards from where they lived.
Perhaps it’s my hangover, or the fact I’m still half-asleep, but I look at the photo on screen for a full minute before recognition kicks in. I take in the dark hair, the smiling face, the full figure. I see the necklace, with its gleaming silver crucifix.
And then I realise.
It’s the woman from yesterday’s advert.
How fast can you run?
When you really have to?
In heels and a work skirt, with your bag banging against your side: how fast?
When you’re late for your train and you have to get home, and you race down the platform with seconds to spare: how fast can you run?
What if it isn’t a train you’re running for, but your life?
If you’re late home from work, and there’s no one in sight. If you haven’t charged your phone and no one knows where you are. If the footsteps behind you are getting closer, and you know, because you do it every day, that you’re on your own; that between the platform and the exit you won’t see another soul.
If there’s breath on your neck, and the panic is rising, and it’s dark, and cold, and wet.
If it’s just the two of you.
Just you, and whoever’s behind you.
Whoever is chasing you.
How fast could you run then?
It doesn’t matter how fast.
Because there’s always someone who can run faster.
8
There was a hand over Kelly’s mouth. She could feel it pressing down on her face; taste the sweat on the fingers slipping between her lips. A heavy weight shifted on top of her and a knee forced her legs apart. She tried to scream but the sound stayed in her throat, filling her chest with panic. She tried to remember her police training – the self-defence moves they’d been taught – but her mind was blank and her body frozen.
The hand slid away, but the reprieve was momentary. It was replaced by a mouth; a tongue forcing its way inside her.
She heard his breath – heavy, excited – and a rhythmic knocking.
‘Kelly.’
The knocking intensified.
‘Kelly. Are you okay?’
The bedroom door opened and the weight moved from her chest. Kelly took a great gulp of air.
‘You were having another one.’
Kelly fought to get her breath under control. It was dark in her room; the shadow in the open doorway backlit by the light in the hall. ‘What time is it?’
‘Half past two.’
‘God, I’m sorry. Did I wake you?’
‘I’m just in off lates. You okay now?’
‘Yes. Thank you.’
The door closed and Kelly lay in the dark, sweat running between her breasts. It had been ten years since she had sat holding Lexi’s hand, listening to her tell the police officer what had happened, then – later – watched her sister through a television screen, as her statement was videoed. Watched her twin sister cry as she recounted every little detail; every humiliating, painful detail.
‘I don’t want Mum and Dad hearing all this,’ Lexi had said.
Kelly had asked her once, years later, if she ever had nightmares. She’d said it casually, as though she’d only just thought about it. As though Kelly didn’t wake with the weight of a man on her chest; with his fingers inside her.
‘Once,’ Lexi had said. ‘A few days after it happened. But never again.’
Kelly’s pillow was drenched in sweat. She threw it on to the floor and rested her head on the sheet beneath. She was off work today. She’d go and see Lexi; maybe have supper with the boys. But first, there was something she had to do.
The London Gazette’s offices were in Shepherd’s Bush, in a huge but unprepossessing building housing several other newspapers. Kelly showed her warrant card to the receptionist then waited on an upright armchair far less comfortable than it looked. She ignored the knot of anxiety in her stomach: so she was working on an investigation in her spare time – it wasn’t an offence to do unpaid overtime.
Even in her head it didn’t sound convincing. Cathy Tanning’s bag dip was no longer hers to investigate, and Kelly should have reported this new development to the sergeant on the Dip Squad as soon as it came in.