Hitting End, I slam my phone down on the couch. Fuck, this shit. She won’t answer, I’ll go to her. I assume she’s just ignoring me, but what if she’s not? What if something did happen to her? That thought alone has me running upstairs to get dressed. I’m out the door and on the road five minutes later.
On the drive over, I call her again. This time it goes straight to voice mail. “Berklee, fuck!” I end the call and toss my phone in the cup holder. I make the fifteen-minute drive in half the time. Throwing the truck in Park, I grab my keys and run to the door. I pound on it, not giving a single fuck if I wake the entire neighborhood. “Berklee!” I shout. Time seems to stand still as I wait for her to open the damn door. When it finally flies open, there’s a pissed-off Barry staring back at me.
“What the hell, Crew?” he asks. I can tell he just woke up.
I push past him. “Where’s her room?” I ask, walking toward the hallway.
“Who? What the fuck is going on?” he says, following me.
“Berklee!”
“What did you do to her?” he asks, anger lacing his voice.
I turn to face him. “Not a fucking thing she didn’t want. Then I woke up and she was gone. She won’t answer her phone.”
“Maybe she doesn’t want to talk to you,” he offers, his voice calmer.
“I don’t give a fuck,” I call over my shoulder. I need to see if she’s all right and find out why she left.
“Second door on the right,” Barry yells.
I stop in front of the door and try the handle. It’s unlocked. The bed is empty but the shower is on. I run my fingers through my hair. She’s here. I take a minute to let that sink in. I’d assumed she was avoiding me, but damn, the thought of something happening to her shook me to the core.
I debate on what I should do. Join her in the shower? Surprise her when she comes out? The water turns off, making my decision for me. I kick off my shoes and make myself comfortable on her bed.
“Glad to see you’re okay,” I say when she emerges. She screams until realization sets in that it’s me.
“Crew, what are you doing here?”
“Well, when I went to bed last night, I had this hot little redhead tucked into my side, her body wrapped around mine. When I woke up, she was gone. Then when I tried to call her, she wouldn’t answer her fucking phone,” I growl.
“I was busy,” she says defiantly.
“Yeah? Well, I was worried something had happened to you on the way home. I had no idea what time you left, and you didn’t have a car.” I’m barely hanging on by a thread between my anger, the relief that she’s okay, and looking at her in nothing but a towel wrapped around that tight little body of hers.
“I’m fine.” She sighs.
“I can see that.” I stand and in two steps am in front of her. “Why did you leave?” I ask, my tone softer now.
Looking down at her feet, she moves them back and forth across the plush carpeting. “I wasn’t sure you really wanted me to stay,” she says, never making eye contact.
Placing my fingers under her chin, I lift so her eyes meet mine. “I told you that’s where you’d be.”
“Yeah, and then I was exhausted and fell asleep. I know this is a benefits-only arrangement, and that’s new to me. I wasn’t sure that included spending the night.”
“Did I ask you to leave?”
“No, but—”
“No. No buts. I wanted you there.” I step forward, my body aligned with hers. “I wasn’t done with you,” I say, leaning down and running my lips over her neck.
“We need parameters.”
“Why?”
“Are we hiding this? I mean, Maggie and Barry know, and Zane knows. I thought the point was to keep it on the down low? It’s not a relationship, after all.”
“I don’t give a fuck who knows. We’re adults.”
“We are, but that opens it up to questions. Questions that are uncomfortable to answer.”
“This was your idea,” I remind her.
“I know that,” she snaps. “I just think we need to set some rules. No public displays and no sleepovers.”
“Berklee.”
“Crew, if I were anyone else, would I have even been allowed at your place last night? Allowed to be in your bed?”
“Fuck no,” I growl.
“See, that’s my point. We’re crossing lines. We have to keep them straight and defined.”
Shit. I let her words sink in and I know she’s right, but I don’t want to. I crave her. “So no PDA, no sleepovers. What else?”
“I think we need to spread out our time.”
What the fuck? “Why?”
She’s quiet for a few minutes before those baby blues seek me out. “I have to keep my feelings out of this, Crew. If you keep insisting that I spend more . . . intimate time with you, time with you at your place and in your bed, my heart’s going to get involved and it’s going to be shattered when you’re done with this”—she waves her hands in the air—“arrangement.”
“So . . . what? You’re done? We’ve barely gotten started.” I need more of her. One night wasn’t enough. No way can she walk away. Not yet.
“Gah! You’re not even listening to me. No, we’re not done. I just need to space our time out a little. You’re a great guy, Crew, and if I let you hold me all night, the lines are going to blur, and that’s not what either of us signed up for.”
I don’t like it, but she’s right. I close my eyes and think about how it felt to fall asleep holding her close. Lines were definitely beginning to blur. “Okay, so tell me what’s next.” I place my hands on her hips and pull her close. “I’ve not had my fill of you, beautiful.”
I watch as she takes a deep breath and slowly exhales. “We’ve had fun this weekend, but Maggie and I have plans tonight, so I’ll see you at the club on Monday.”
“What kind of plans?”
“Crew, casual, remember? You don’t have to worry about me holding up my end of the bargain. No one else while we’re together.”
I nod. “Fine. Be safe. Call me if you need anything.”
“We will. I’ll see you on Monday,” she says, trying to leave my embrace.
“We’re not in public,” I tell her.
Those big blue eyes stare up at me in confusion as I lean down and capture her lips with mine. I take my time tasting her, holding her close. “I’ll see you on Monday.” I give her one more chaste kiss before turning and walking away.
“Later,” Barry calls from the couch as I pass him.
I wave over my shoulder and stalk out to my truck. Grabbing my phone from the cup holder, I send Zane a message.
Me: Supplies?
Zane: Ice for the Yeti.
Me: Food?
Zane: I picked it up last night. Good to go.
Me: Be there in 20.
I throw the phone back in the cup holder and pull out onto the road. A day hanging out with the guys is just what I need to get my head straight.