‘He did mention the idea to me, once or twice,’ she said. ‘There are so many authors and celebrities within striking distance of Peasebrook, and we’re not so far from London. It could be a real draw. Especially in a setting like this.’
Sarah had recovered her composure. ‘Exactly! We felt we could attract a good calibre of speakers. The thing is, it was his dream, but it was starting to become a real possibility. We’re very well set up for putting on events here. And – and I think it would be a shame to let the opportunity slip. I thought about doing the festival in his name.’ She swallowed. ‘The Nightingale Literary Festival.’
‘Oh!’ said Emilia. ‘That would be a wonderful tribute.’
‘I would need your help, though. And the support of the shop. We’d need you to supply the books, of course. And advise on who to ask. I mean, there’s masses and masses to think about, but I wanted to see what you thought. Because I couldn’t do it without you. It would have to be a team effort.’
Emilia took a piece of shortbread and bit into it. It was a wonderful idea. She could see it all in her mind’s eye. Literary lions and lionesses holding forth in the ballroom, the audience hanging on their every word. A glittering programme; the Glastonbury of book festivals. It would be a wonderful boost for the town too – people attending the festival would want accommodation and would go into the pubs and restaurants. And they could get sponsorship from local businesses …
But she had to be cautious. She didn’t want to get Sarah’s hopes up. It was such an enchanting idea, but she couldn’t show too much enthusiasm.
‘The thing is,’ she said, ‘I’m not sure what I’m doing with the shop yet. I’m afraid it’s not in very good shape financially. It’s not making money at the moment: I’m struggling to cover my overheads. It needs a lot spending on it if it’s going to even begin to make a profit and I haven’t decided yet if that’s what I want to do.’
Sarah looked horrified. ‘You can’t let it close, surely?’
‘I don’t want to. Of course not. But I can’t just keep it going out of sentiment. That would be foolish. And I’ve got my staff to consider, as well as myself.’
Sarah considered her words. ‘I understand.’ She sighed. ‘Julius never mentioned the shop being in trouble.’
The way she said it gave Emilia the impression they spoke often, and that Sarah was hurt by his omission. She smiled. ‘I don’t think Dad quite saw that it was. It’s all a bit of a muddle. I’ve only scratched the surface. But he ran it by the seat of his pants, rather.’
‘So was he in debt?’
‘Nothing awful or to be ashamed of. But there are quite a few outstanding invoices.’
‘Gosh.’ Sarah looked perturbed. ‘He never implied he was in trouble.’
‘As I said, I don’t think he thought he was. My father’s famous line was I don’t do numbers.’
‘Oh dear.’ Sarah leaned forward. ‘Between you and me, I have rather more experience of getting out of hideous debt than you might imagine. A while ago now we nearly lost Peasebrook. I won’t go into it, but it was pretty frightening. So I understand how you feel. And if I can help at all …’
‘I have Andrea, my accountant – I was at school with her. She’s like a walking calculator in Louboutins. She’s been wonderful. But even she can’t wave a magic wand. I’ve got some tough decisions to make. And if I do go ahead, it’s going to be hard work. Not that I’m afraid of that, of course …’
‘It just goes to show you,’ said Sarah, ‘that you can think you know someone, but you have no idea.’ As she said it, her cheeks flushed pink. She put her face in her hands, and in that moment Emilia recognised that her father and Sarah must have been closer she realised. She wasn’t sure how she felt about this realisation. She liked Sarah very much, but there was no getting away from the fact she was very firmly married to Ralph. Should she press Sarah for more detail? Did Sarah want her to realise? She thought she perhaps she did. She had more than hinted.
Maybe today wasn’t the day. Everything was still a bit raw. They were feeling their way with each other. If they went ahead with the festival, and worked together, maybe the whole story would come out at some point, when they were both ready.
‘I think the festival is a wonderful idea,’ she said finally. ‘And if I do decide to stay open, I think we should do it. As you say, it would be a perfect memorial. My father would be proud.’
Sarah’s smile was a bit wobbly. ‘He would …’
Emilia put her teacup down. ‘I’ll let you know as soon as I’ve decided what I’m doing.’
There was a pause. Sarah was twisting her ring round again. Something unsaid was hanging in the air.
‘Emilia – there’s something I’d like to share with you. But it’s totally confidential. It can’t go any further.’
Emilia could see Sarah was struggling with what she was about to say.
‘Is it about you and my father?’ she asked gently.