Yet when she closed her eyes, the big shining orb of the moon was burning on her eyeballs, and when she opened them again, she was sure Kane was there in the bed beside her. Screwing up her eyes, she blocked them all out. Instead she conjured up her lioness, and dreamt of running along, four giant paws and her beautiful long tail, sandy fur, the wind blowing through it as she made a dash for the river where she would jump in and splash around with her brothers.
Before she could stop herself, a wave of homesickness swept over her and she was crying, great racking sobs that jarred her body. Biting down on her pillow, she fought for control. She could do this! She had to do this. For her father, for her family. As the only daughter it had been more sensible for Amara to take up the contract, but it hurt like a big rip in her heart that it had come to this, and for the first time she resented her family, and that made her sorrow even worse.
Five hours later, she was still awake. The clock read 4:00am, everyone else would be in bed. She got up, dressed in a T-shirt and loose pants, and went down to the kitchen. Maybe a cup of tea and watching the sunrise would make her feel better. Sleep was not her friend tonight and she was tired of fighting it, along with the other images in her head of the home she missed, and her lioness.
A faint headache accompanied her as she went down to the kitchen. The air was chill, the heat from last night’s cooking now gone, although the smell of roast pork still lingered. Amara went to the kettle and filled it with fresh water. Leaning against the counter she waited for it to boil, closing her eyes and rubbing her temples to ease her head.
“You couldn’t sleep either?” his voice asked.
Her head flew up, the thumping in her temples intensifying as her heart thundered in her chest. “I … no.” She was confused. If he was her mate, then she should have felt his presence, but her senses were dimmed. One hand strayed absently to stroke her collar.
Kane came closer, and her body became aware of him, her breasts swelling, her nipples becoming hardened peaks, as though they were trying to reach out to experience his touch. She longed for him to brush his hand over her sensitive skin and take her arousal to a new high. Amara shifted uneasily. She needed to get control of herself.
“Please,” she said, taking a step back.
“Don’t be afraid,” he said gently. Too late, she thought.
“What do you want?” she asked.
“Answers,” he said bluntly. And he looked so miserable, that she wanted to hold him. This man, so handsome, so strong, was hurt and confused and she desperately wanted to make it right for him. But she had no idea how she could do or say anything, without making him feel worse.
“I can’t help you,” she said, but she didn’t move away when he reached out and touched his fingers to her collar. Nor did she flinch when his fingers strayed off the cold metal and touched her skin. The electricity still shocked her, but she was ready for it this time. Because she had questions too.
Each held the answers the other sought. Somehow they were bound together, and as she looked into his confused eyes, copper coloured, flecked with cream, the colour of her lioness’s fur, one of those answers fell into place.
“It’s the same. Isn’t it?” he asked, holding up his wrist with the bracelet on.
“I think so,” she said, not wanting to commit to revealing what she thought he was. She still did not know why he wore the bracelet, or how much he knew. This might be a test, and if she failed and revealed what she thought, her contract might not be sold; instead, it might be terminated. She might be terminated.
The human world was suspicious of shifters. Ever since the war, humans had passed a law that stated every shifter in the human world had to wear a collar to stop them changing into their beast. If anyone was caught without one, it was well within a human’s rights to terminate the creature. It would be easy for the Reiniers to take off her collar and then say they were acting in self-defence. And in doing so, terminate the possible fallout by the paparazzi finding out Kane Reinier was a shifter.
“Do you know what I am?” he asked.
“No,” she replied. Keep it simple. Non-committal.
“But I am the same as you?” he asked.
Yes. “I don’t know,” she replied.
“Can’t you tell?” he asked, his breath warm on her face as he leaned in to ask her, his voice no more than a breath.
Her eyes met his and she saw his uncertainty, tinged with fear. He didn’t know. This wasn’t a trick. He was scared; this news was new, terrifying, because it would change his life forever. It had already changed his life forever. Last night he had learned his life was not what he had thought it was. There was no going back.
“No.” She shook her head. Self-preservation was still uppermost in her head. But he is our mate. Somehow, and maybe it was the presence of him so close to her, but her lioness managed to speak to her, a voice she hadn’t heard for weeks.