“Get off my dick. She was upset and not thinking clearly. She’d just been humiliated in front of everyone she knows and she was out for vengeance.” I don’t tell him I let her have it, hard and repeatedly. While we’re both adults who are capable of making adult decisions, I don’t think it’s a good idea to be truthful with my brother. I doubt Bane would intentionally out me, but it’s better to keep this quiet just to be safe. I don’t think my father would be very impressed if he found out my attention was quite so divided. I’m here to avoid the bullshit, not add to it by sleeping with Amie.
“This is a business trip. I helped her out when our dickhead cousin showed up. Her situation is fucked and I’m not interested in more drama than I already have.” I really have gotten myself in a lot deeper than I meant to. And the repercussions of this, if anyone finds out, are further reaching than Amie can understand. My history with Armstrong is tumultuous. He’s too self-absorbed to believe this wasn’t just a revenge screw.
Bane’s silent for a few seconds. “Are you spending time with her?”
“I have meetings and work. I can’t lie on the beach and ward off the predators. She’s a big girl, and I’m not her babysitter. I can’t protect someone who’s not interested in being protected, Bane.” It’s true. I made an attempt to protect her from me at the very beginning, but she sure didn’t make it easy.
“I get that. Just watch out for her if you can. Ruby’s pretty worried. I don’t know that Amie makes the best choices when she’s stressed out.”
“So one second you’re concerned I’m going to hook up with her and now you want me to be her guard dog. Make up your mind, little brother, either you want me involved or you don’t.”
His sigh echoes my frustration. “Sorry. I’m stressed because Ruby is stressed. Apparently Amie doesn’t want to deal with the Armstrong situation, and whenever Ruby brings it up she changes the subject.”
“Can you blame her?”
“Nope. Not at all, but Ruby says this is worse than the way she usually manages things.”
“Worse how? It’s not as if there’s a precedent for her circumstances.” I can’t imagine it’s every day the groom gets caught cheating on the bride at the wedding.
“I get that and I don’t know exactly. She’s just . . . quiet. Ruby’s worried she’s in a bad headspace. Just . . . don’t let anyone take advantage of her if you can help it.”
“I’ll try and keep an eye on her.” And every other part of my body. “Do you know how bad the rumors are? How are the Mooreheads spinning this in the media?” I’ve done the requisite searches, but I haven’t seen anything that corroborates what Armstrong said about it being a recording of the two of them. I can’t imagine anyone believing it.
“It’s mostly social media gossip, but everything is pulled down as fast as it goes up. I can’t fathom the money they’re parting with to keep this so quiet.”
“Maybe they’ll bankrupt themselves in the process.”
“Wouldn’t that be some justice. Armstrong is heading back to New York today, according to Mom, so at least Amie won’t have to deal with him anymore.”
That’s good news for Amie, great news for me.
Bane moves on to the much safer topic of business.
But the things he says about Amie stay with me. I know I told her I was fine with being a temporary diversion, but I’m not so sure I’ll be able to leave this thing between us here like I’m supposed to.
Fifteen: Toys Toys Toys
Amie
“Are you sure you don’t want me to meet you at the airport?” Ruby asks for the third time.
“I get in at seven in the morning, there’s no point.”
“What if Armstrong shows up?”
“He’s not going to show up.” It’s something I’ve considered might happen, but in the two weeks since I threatened a restraining order I haven’t heard from him at all. I haven’t heard from his lawyer either, even though I know he’s back in New York. Ruby’s kept me abreast of all the happenings, whether I wanted to hear about them or not. But I have a feeling she’s censored quite a bit, and my knowledge is blissfully limited.
Ruby sighs. “Okay. Fine. But message me as soon as you land, and again when you get back to your apartment.”
“Of course I’ll message, but you’ll be asleep, so it’s not like it matters.” I fold another dress and tuck it into my suitcase. Most of my clothes are packed. The only things left are the dress I’m wearing tonight and my outfit for the plane tomorrow.
And my tickle trunk of toys, but I’m not packing that until later.
“So what’re you doing on your last night?”
“I don’t know. I might go to the bar, have a couple of cocktails, and then stare at the stars and reflect on my time here.”
“What about Hottie Hook-Up? Is he still there? You should get in a few last orgasms before you leave.”
Ruby kept on me about hooking up, so I finally relented and admitted I might’ve slept with someone. I told her his name was Dick, mostly because I was floundering and it was the first thing I came up with since Lex has a very nice one. Ruby decided it wasn’t appealing, so she called him Hottie-Hook Up. It felt good to tell her something, even if it couldn’t be the truth. If I tell Ruby she won’t be able to keep it from Bane and then the circle of secrecy expands too much and becomes murky. I can’t ask her to lie to Bane for me, it’s not fair.
“We’ll see.” I’m purposely noncommittal, because talking about it makes me feel guilty for lying, but it’s too complicated. And it’s not like it’s going to happen again after I leave this island.
It’s not his fault I’m far more interested in him than I should be. I’m sure the feelings will wane once I’m home and he’s not my sole source of support. I think I’ve assigned him some kind of savior role, which is making it feel like feelings, when really it’s my desperate need to cling to something that isn’t my very shitty life. The one I’m going to have to face much sooner than I’d like.
“What about Lex?”
“What about Lex?” I wish I could keep my voice from rising octaves whenever he’s mentioned. I’ve tried hard to avoid talking about him. It makes my heart hurt that I have to leave what we have here, but we’ve agreed it’s for the best.
“Will you see him before you go?”
It’s a good thing we’re not video chatting this conversation, because Ruby would see right through me. “I don’t know. Maybe? He’s been pretty busy with work stuff. I’m sure he has better things to do than entertain me on the last night of my failed honeymoon.”
“It’s not a failed honeymoon, Amie. It’s not your fault Armstrong is a douche.”
I might not be at fault, but despite Lex’s ability to be an excellent distraction, I’ve had more than enough time to consider my own part in this travesty of a wedding. I ignored so many signs along the way. And this time with Lex reinforces that. He’s so easy to be with. I don’t have to watch myself, or be anything I’m not when we’re together. “You know what I mean. Anyway, I should go. I need to finish packing, then I need to get my drink on so I can sleep through most of the flight tomorrow.”
“Okay. I love you. Go get laid one last time. I’ll see you soon.” Ruby hangs up before I can respond with anything pithy.