Hook, Line and Blinker (Miss Fortune Mystery #10)

Gertie grinned. “I knew these things would come in handy when I bought them.”

“Let’s just hope all this handiness yields us some answers, and that neither the deputy nor Sheriff Lee gets too ambitious and hurries. I really don’t want to get shot at again. It’s getting old.”

“That seems a strange complaint given your chosen profession.”

“Then maybe I’m getting old.”

“You’re not getting old,” Gertie said. “You’ve just got more to lose.”

I frowned. It was a valid point and one I might have to think about later…when I wasn’t worried about being shot at again. I lifted the binoculars and scanned the tree line, then spotted Ida Belle inching up to the edge of the woods directly behind the window she was going to enter through. She gave me a thumbs-up. I dropped the binoculars and watched as Sheriff Lee made his way around the corner of the building and started walking our direction.

“Wait until Sheriff Lee gets to the middle of the building, then set one off,” I said.

Gertie ripped a firecracker off her pack and readied her match, grinning like a five-year-old at a birthday party. We watched as Sheriff Lee’s horse plodded along, then finally he reached the halfway point.

Gertie lit the firecracker, then tossed it. It set off a good pop and Sheriff Lee stopped the horse for a second, scanning the woods. Gertie lit a second one and threw it, and Sheriff Lee zeroed in on the sound and started toward us at a faster clip. The deputy came around the building from the front, and Sheriff Lee pointed to the woods where we were hiding.

“One more,” I said.

Gertie stuck the match and lit her firecracker, then tossed it. We waited for the impending explosion, but nothing happened.

“Must have been a dud,” I said. “Try again.”

Gertie nodded, lit another firecracker and threw.

And that’s when everything went horribly wrong, as only Gertie could manage.

“You threw the match,” I said, starting to panic. “Where is the firecracker?”

Gertie jumped back, looking down at the ground. “I dropped it.”

I spied her open handbag and heard a fizzling sound.

“Abort!” I yelled and shoved Gertie in the direction of the boat.

I took off down the tree line toward Ida Belle, in case she didn’t hear me. Barreling through the brush, arms in front of my face, I didn’t even take a second to find the easiest path. All I had time to do was pray that Gertie was giving it her best and was out of range for whatever was coming next.

A second later, all hell broke loose.





Chapter Five





The explosion was definitely not caused by firecrackers. Whatever Gertie had in that handbag caused such a blast that it could probably be heard back in Sinful. I rushed to the edge of the woods, praying that neither Sheriff Lee nor the deputy was near the handbag, and peered out just in time to see Sheriff Lee’s horse tender his one-second notice.

The startled animal whirled around so fast, I’m surprised he didn’t break his ancient legs, then he set off at a dead run directly at the deputy. The deputy leaped to the side but the horse still clipped him in the shoulder and sent him slamming into the turf. Sheriff Lee had completely given up on the reins and was leaned forward over the saddle, his arms wrapped around the horse’s neck. If he remained seated, it would be a miracle. If the horse didn’t have a heart attack, it would be a miracle.

Given the determination and rate of speed that the four-legged law enforcement officer was moving, he probably wouldn’t slow until he reached his stall or keeled over. I just hoped Sheriff Lee survived to tell the tale. I whirled around and continued running for the spot where I thought Ida Belle had been waiting but saw movement out of the corner of my eye and slid to a stop in horror as I saw Ida Belle’s legs disappear over the window ledge of Hot Rod’s shop.

I yanked out my phone and sent her a text.

Get the hell out of there. The deputy has probably already called in the armed forces.

I watched the window, waiting for her to swing her legs back out, but no movement was forthcoming. I waited another extremely long ten seconds, then when I heard sirens in the distance, texted again.

5-0 on the way. Have to find Gertie and get out of here.

Just when I was getting ready to go through the window and haul her out myself, she poked her head out and did a flip-roll over the sill and onto the ground. If I hadn’t been so anxious to get away, I might have taken a second to be impressed, but we didn’t have that kind of time. We’d have to high-five over it later. Hopefully, not in a police lineup. I stepped out of the woods and motioned to Ida Belle to hurry, and she ran for the tree line.

“What happened?” she asked as she stepped into the brush.

“Gertie,” I said.

That’s all the explanation she needed. She nodded and we set off in what I hoped was a diagonal path straight to the boat. The brush was thicker going than coming, and with one arm clutching the binoculars that I still wore around my neck, that left only one arm to block my face. I knew my forearms and hands were going to show signs of a foliage attack. If it had been winter, and I hadn’t been shedding my clothes in front of the local law enforcement, it might not have been a problem, but since neither of those was the case, I was going to have to invent a story for the scratches. One that didn’t involve Hot Rod, automobiles, or my being anywhere but my own backyard.

A bead of sweat fell into my left eye and I reached up to swipe it, which just happened to be the same time the woods ended and the bank began. I shot off the edge of the bank, which was about two feet above the water line, and hit the water, making a splash like an orca. I came right back out as fast as I went in. It probably looked like video on reverse. No way was I spending time in any murky water in Sinful. Some gator craving a casserole might settle for a lean CIA agent.

Ida Belle paused long enough to watch me run on water, then pointed down the bank where Gertie was limping toward the boat. We had missed the mark by about twenty yards, which wasn’t bad considering we were in panicked flight, had no path, and were trying to keep from being eaten alive by the brush. I grabbed the binoculars, which hadn’t fallen off during my free fall, and we took off again.