“Sure, baby,” he said, and watched as she left the room. It felt odd, eating alone. Once he’d finished, he cleaned the plates and put away the leftovers before going back out to the barn.
The foal and his mama were back in the stall after spending a day in the turnout pen. Jace had been looking forward to spending some time admiring the growing baby with Lily Mae, and perhaps having a follow-up to their earlier romp in the tack room.
He took his hat off and ran his hand through his hair, wondering if perhaps this wasn’t part of the problem. He and Lily Mae had sex almost every day. Most of the time, he instigated it, knowing that she loved how he took the lead. But now he worried that her naturally submissive tendencies had made her reluctant to refuse even when she was tired or sore. Their sex was usually vigorous, sometimes even rough, and Lily Mae always climaxed several times. But even so, could it be that it was too much of a good thing? It seemed he couldn’t just hold her to him without fucking her; she was that desirable. Now he couldn’t help but blame himself.
“Here, girl.” Jace dumped a generous helping of grain into the mare’s bucket before tossing a pat of hay over the top of the stall into the hay rack. There were a few more chores to do before he went in, and he headed straight to the shower when he got back in the house.
Lily Mae was curled under the blanket when he walked into the bedroom. He looked down at her sleeping form, a feeling of love and protectiveness swelling in his heart. Pulling back the blanket, he slid in beside her and gently wrapped his arms around her.
“I just want to hold you, baby,” he said. “Is that okay?”
She nodded. With her back to him, he couldn’t see the tears running down his fiancée’s face.
Chapter Eleven
“You’re up early.” It was dark when Lily Mae opened her eyes to find Jace pulling on his blue jeans.
“Long day,” he said. “I’m hauling that bull up to Beau Tighlman’s ranch to swap it out for one of his.”
“That’s today?” Lily Mae asked sleepily. “I thought you weren’t doing that until Monday.”
“I wasn’t.” Jace had turned to the closet to fetch a shirt. In the glow of the lamp on the bedside table, Lily Mae watched his muscles move as he reached for the hanger. He turned as he pulled the shirt on. “Beau’s mama’s having surgery on Monday, so he wanted to move it up to today.”
“Oh.” Lily Mae swallowed hard. The plan that would take him away from the farm from dawn till after dark had been moved up by two days. That meant her plan was moved up, too. She swallowed the lump in her throat and tried to keep her voice level as she replied.
“Be careful,” she said.
He walked over and leaned down, tilting her chin up with his finger.
“I promise,” he said. “But you have to promise me you’re gonna be in a better mood when I get home. Because if not, you’re going to either tell me why you’re so glum or I’m going to spank the reason out of you. Clear?”
His authoritative drawl had Lily Mae soaking her panties, and she nodded, her ‘okay’ barely audible. Only when she heard him shut the front door of the house in departure did she allow herself to break down, curling herself around his pillow and sobbing, inhaling his scent with each ragged intake of breath.
She’d planned to leave on Monday, after two days of praying for some kind of miracle that could allow her to see a way out of her situation. But now she knew that wasn’t going to happen.
It was all Lily Mae could do to pull herself out of bed and pack the suitcase for her trip. Her heart twisted painfully in her chest as she walked into the large closet and looked at the row of clothes on her side. Jace had bought all of them for her—pretty flowered dresses, feminine flouncy skirts, blue jeans and tight little t-shirts, cowboy boots—things he knew were her real style. She had no clothing left from her old life, not here.
She pulled on a scoop-necked dress with a delicate edge of lace around the top. It ended just above her knees. It was fun, girlish. It was also one of Jace’s favorites. She felt guilty wearing it, but wanted to keep something to remind her of what it had felt like—having someone who knew what she liked in every way.
She couldn’t keep everything. She couldn’t keep him, not with what she was about to do. Not with what she’d done. She’d broken faith by keeping a secret from him. Telling the truth wasn’t an option; Tony Orzo was dangerous, and she couldn’t risk seeing the man she loved hurt.
She couldn’t keep the ring, even though selling it would give her the money she needed to pay Tony. Lily Mae worked it off her finger and put it in a jewelry box on the dresser. She thought about writing a note but changed her mind. The last time she’d written a note, it had been designed to make him follow her. She’d not do that this time. After today, it was truly and finally over between them.