“What?”
I actually laugh. It’s small, and sounds terribly out of place after all this serious talk. But I need this laugh so badly—I do it again.
“That transient traveling sideshow-slash-rave?”
“The one where you fucked me on top of your car in front of fifty strangers.”
“Jesus. What else don’t I know?”
I shrug. “You know way more than I do, that’s for sure. I don’t know what’s happening to me. I came here for ballet. And to get away from Logan. He’s not supposed to talk to me. His parents could slap me with contempt of court if he says I broke the restraining order. And I still feel bad about Scott. I didn’t love him, or anything. But he was my friend and I miss him.”
Bric leans down to kiss me. “Don’t get lost in guilt, Nadia. Don’t do it. You can mourn him. You can miss him. But you can’t blame yourself for his actions. You’re not responsible for that.”
I have wanted to trust Bric since the first time we met. I just didn’t know it. But I really want to trust him now. And I don’t know if I should. “I came here for a new beginning,” I say.
“Then it’s time you got one,” Bric replies. He holds out his hand and says, “Hello. My name is Elias.”
I stare up at him. Then take his hand in mine and shake it. He’s so powerful. And controlling. And wild. But he’s also gentle. And loving. And smart. “Nadia,” I say. “Nice to meet you, Elias.”
“Would you like to be friends?” he asks.
After a few moments I say, “Yes. I’d like that a lot.”
Chapter Thirty-Five - Bric
Dinner at Quin’s is awkward at first. Not for Nadia. She fits in immediately and is over in the kitchen with Chella and Rochelle drinking wine. But it’s like… it’s like Quin, and Smith, and I are all very different people now and we’re not sure where we stand.
I hold Adley, who bats at my face with her chubby hands and drools onto my six-hundred-dollar shirt. “That tooth is adorable,” I say, smiling at Adley’s newest milestone.
“Yeah.” Quin laughs. “I thought you’d appreciate that.”
He’s sitting across from me in a chair. One ankle propped up on one knee. Smile on that golden-boy face of his. Looking like a motherfucking movie star who won the lottery.
Smith is on the couch with his dogs, two of the rats curled up in his lap and the husky pulling on his pant leg. It rips, and the puppy runs off with his prize. Smith sighs, looking down at the leftover strings. But then he smiles too. Because he loves it. He loves every bit of his new life.
“So,” Quin says.
“So,” I say, setting Adley down on my knee.
“You like her?” Quin nods his head to Nadia.
I look over at her and nod. “I like her a lot,” I say. “She’s a ballerina. Great one, too.”
Quin smiles at Smith. They share a look I know well.
Because I know them. And they know me. Everyone in this room knows who I am now. And I think they probably see the same thing in me that I see in them. Happiness.
Finally.
We all won the game, I think. How could we be here, with these beautiful, smart, talented women, and not think we’re the luckiest men on earth?
“Are you playing with her?” Smith asks.
“No,” I say. “The game ended a long time ago. I just didn’t realize it.” I look at Smith and say, “I’m selling the Club.”
“Well, it’s about time,” he says back. And then he takes a sip of his drink and smiles into his glass.
I think that’s all they needed to hear. That I’m over it. That I’m OK with it. That I have a future that doesn’t center around manipulation.
Dinner is better than expected after that. The food is good. The conversation never lags. We find our way through the unknown and decide, at the end of the night, that we’re still a team. We just added four new members to it, that’s all.
Smith and I make plans to go into business together. Since I’m kind of a real-estate whore, we’re gonna build some low-income housing to augment the neighborhoods around his gyms.
So I guess we’re gonna turn into a bunch of boring do-gooders.
I can live with that. It’s time to grow up.
In April, when the ground has thawed enough for digging in Montana and Nadia and I have settled into the Cherry Creek mansion, I take her home again. And this time I do it right. I introduce her to everyone, one face and name at a time. She’ll never remember them all. I barely remember them all. It’s weird. And unconventional. And weird.
But it’s us. That’s all I have to say about it these days. It’s just who we are.
I say goodbye to Luc properly as he’s lowered into the ground. Nadia cries, even though she never knew him. I know she’s thinking of her friend, also a victim of self-destruction.
And I realize I’m lucky.
Very fucking lucky that my friends loved me enough to drag me through to the other side. That Nadia is my light in the dark. And that she believed in me, even when I didn’t believe in myself.
I might’ve been a pretty bad player in the game of Taking Turns. Probably the worst in history, if that’s a thing.
But I’m a goddamned genius at the game of life as far as I’m concerned.
When I got my turn… I didn’t waste it.
Game over.
Epilogue - Jordan
I’m looking for a few good men, the ad starts.
That’s a goddamned good first line right there. I might be a copywriting genius. I might’ve missed my calling.
Must be ambitious.
Ambition is important. I need guys like me. Guys who will do whatever it takes to get the job done.
Must be loyal.
You don’t have shit if you don’t have loyalty.
Willing to travel.
Because who needs to be tied down to one city, right? I thought about buying Bric’s club. But then I pictured myself in ten years as Bric and decided, fuck that. I won’t have a Jordan to pull me back from the edge and slap me into reality.
I gotta play this right.
Must be dominant.
Because let’s face it. The women who will come to me for help need that kind of man.
Pay includes signing bonus, expense account, and retirement plan.
I have to smile at my brilliance. God, I’m so fucking smart.
I read it over and over, but nope. It’s perfect. So I hit post. And it goes up online all over the world.
I love being a lawyer. And it’ll come in handy when shit goes wrong. But this is what I was meant to do and I can’t wait to get started.
GET MY NEXT BOOK, FIVE, HERE.
END OF BOOK SHIT
Welcome to the End of Book Shit. This is the part of the book where I get to say anything I want and you gotta read it! (Or listen, since I will have to narrate all this out load in the audiobook).