“Not this time.” Ryder carefully reached out and took my hand, giving it a little squeeze.
Clearing his throat, Theo rubbed the back of his neck as he brought us back on topic. “Similarly, a forest kitsune and a fire kitsune could mate, but their child may have neither of their powers… they could make a wind kitsune or a celestial kitsune.” Hiro snorted at this, and I felt like there was a reason Theo used this example, but I chose not to ask for answers at the moment. “There’s one truth among all these scenarios, though, Nix. A part-blood shifter and a full-blood shifter will never make a full-blooded shifter. When I took your blood the other day, before all this went down, I confirmed that you are full-blooded.” He paused and looked around the room before dropping the bomb that was just dawning in my mind. “Michael isn’t your father.”
“He’s… not my father.” I felt like a parrot, repeating what he said back to him.
“Nix, while I didn’t realize that Michael was a shifter—a part-blood—until the other night when he attacked you, I had a theory that he couldn’t have been your father. There aren’t many cases of mythological part-bloods these days. They used to be more common before the newest Council took over. Mythologicals are highly prized in our society, and the Council makes sure we all find mates and breed accordingly so we create more mythologicals. It wasn’t always the case, but now it’s looked down upon if a mythological breeds with a regular shifter or a human. It’s seen as diluting the gene pool. If he was a human, like you thought he was, I didn’t think he could have fathered you. You’re too strong. You radiate power. His human genetics would have either muted your powers or your ability to shift. You could have been an anomaly, but I wanted to look into your genetics like we talked about. It’s why I wanted your last names and that blood sample. You’re a full-blooded shifter, Nix.”
“You all thought he wasn’t my father?” I felt empty. They had kept vital information from me? They kept their suspicions from me? I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to feel right now.
Killian answered me. “Suspicions, yes. We asked if you could have been adopted when you were shot. Something didn’t add up, but we weren’t sure. No one has seen a phoenix for ages, and mythological part-bloods aren’t super common; you could have been the exception, an anomaly. We just didn’t know until we had the pleasure of meeting the bastard ourselves. Then, after Theo had healed, he finished running your blood tests and found your markers.”
“Markers?”
“Shifters carry their creature’s genetic markers in the blood. I can’t tell you who your actual parents are without DNA samples, but I can tell you what markers you have.” When Theo stopped talking, I stared around the room with wide eyes. Did they understand how much this was to take in?
“So, he’s not my father?” I was a damn broken record.
“No, sweetheart. He’s not.” Damien said gently. I swear that something broke at that moment because a giggle burst out of me followed by peals of laughter.
My outburst silenced the rest of the room, and I couldn’t contain myself as I laughed hysterically. He wasn’t my fucking father. All those years and I didn’t even belong to him. There was not a piece of him inside me—not one broken, evil, little, tiny bit of his DNA hidden deep inside of me, waiting to come out. What. The. Fuck. It was ridiculous; and sad, and I was pissed as fuck. I was devastated and relieved. I was broken. I didn’t know how to react, so I laughed until I snorted. Looking around the room, I noticed the guys were all on the edge of their seats as they watched me, unsure of how to move forward. Even Damien looked pained at whatever he was picking up off of me.
My stomach hurt as I laughed. I clutched it as tears filled my eyes, and suddenly I was sobbing in between laughs.
“Guys, I think we broke Nix. She’s losing it.” Ryder sounded concerned. I pushed off from the table and walked a few feet away while I wiped the tears with my fingertips, trying to control the sobs and giggles that quickly transitioned to hiccups. Taking a deep breath, I turned towards them. What a sight I was sure I made. My eyes would be puffy and red from all the emotion leaking out of me.
“Why?” The word was breathy and sad.
Damien must have understood because he answered me while everyone else tried to catch my meaning. “Phoenix have strong and desirable powers. He wanted the blood of your Phoenix.”
“He wanted… blood?” I cringed. It sounded fucked up, just like Michael. My frustration at myself built as I tried to wrap my head around everything. I felt like I should know what value phoenix blood held, and I resolved in that moment to learn everything I could about her. She was as much a part of me as I was, and I needed to take control of my own life. I had no excuse. I loved research, hell, I had spent years searching for answers, but I hadn’t set aside any time to keep looking for answers since classes started. What I had researched the day after I found out I was a phoenix had been about shifters in general, nothing specific to my alternate form. I’d have to ask Theo to get me everything he had relating to phoenix, but right now my education needed to start with my heritage. Squaring my shoulders, I took a calming breath and faced the guys.
“Ok, I need answers. Why is phoenix blood important?” I was proud of the strength seeping back into my voice.
“We think your Phoenix’s blood can enhance other shifter’s powers. Michael mentioned selling it.” The growl in Killian’s voice matched the unadulterated anger that surged through me. That fucking piece of scum. He deserved a much more potent expletive; I’d work on it. I felt my fingertips heating as my hatred for Michael blazed, and I had to clench my hands into fists to stave off the fire power I knew was building. I didn’t want to scorch their house if I lost control.
“That’s why he kept you. He’s been waiting for you to shift so he could bleed you dry and sell your fucking blood.” The menace in his voice scared me a little, but I appreciated his anger on my behalf.
“My whole life…” I trailed off as I thought about all the times he had beat me. All the times I had died at his hands. He had been waiting for me to shift, trying to provoke it. All those wasted years when my life could have been something else. I felt the tears building behind my eyes.
“It’s ok to grieve.” Damien walked over to me and slowly reached out, making sure I knew his intentions so I wouldn’t flinch or tense. I sidestepped him. I wasn’t sure I wanted to be touched right now. I wanted to stand on my own two feet. I didn’t want to have to rely on people. “Being fully reliant on people and letting others be there for you when you need them are two separate things. Let us help you. Let us be there for you. We’re all stronger as a family, sweetheart.”
Wrapping my arms around myself, I nodded at him but didn’t move any closer. If he touched me, I might fall apart. I was a roller coaster of feelings as it was, and I needed to be able to finish this conversation and get myself to privacy before I lost control of myself.
“Uh, Nix… your shirt.” The urgency in Ryder’s voice made me look down.
“Oh shit!” I pulled my hands away from myself and fisted them again. I had burned perfect finger sized holes through my hoodie.
Hiro jumped up and placed his hands on my shoulders as he led me to the kitchen. Running cold water, he positioned my hands under the stream of water. “Does this help?”
“I don’t know, you tell me?” He smiled at me.
I laughed and felt the tension release for me in a whoosh. The fire in my fingers died, and I felt more like myself. I wouldn’t let Michael have any more power over me. I was done. He’d had years, and I was going to take my life back. I had when I moved here, and I was doing it again now. No more. I was a fucking Phoenix. These men, Rini, and even her bears were all my family now. I wouldn’t waste tears on Michael or my past anymore.
Seven
Theo