What a good idea. I barely have to think about it. Trusting Jocasta and Kaia implicitly helps. “I agree with everything you just said.”
“They can set projects into motion, similar to the improvements we’ve been implementing in Sinta. They’ll protect our interests here in Tarva and work on opening up the border to the west. We’ll leave Lystra with them. She can either make herself useful or stay out of their way. Either way, with no magic, I don’t think Lystra is a threat to them.”
No. Griffin’s sisters are far more fierce.
I slide my fingers over his broad shoulders again, and Griffin reaches up, pulling my hands down. He tugs until my upper body is flush against his back.
“What do you think?” he asks, his voice low, quiet, and full of weary gravel that speaks of the heartache and emotion of the day.
“I think you’re a genius,” I say, propping my chin on the top of his head and draping my arms more comfortably across his chest.
He squeezes our clasped hands. “Ianthe stays with us.”
“Yes, definitely.” There was never any question in my mind. “What about Bellanca?” I ask.
He inhales deeply before letting out a gusty breath. “I don’t think you could get rid of her if you tried.”
I laugh a little, my exhale stirring his hair. “You really want to go home?” I ask.
He nods. “Don’t you?”
I try to straighten away from him, but Griffin holds on to my hands.
“Cat?”
I swallow so hard before answering that he probably feels my throat move against the back of his head. “It’s daunting to think about facing your parents when I’m the reason for their loss.”
Griffin, who was just starting to relax, goes noticeably rigid again. He lets go of my hands and then looks at me over his shoulder. “Nothing that happened today was your fault.”
“I was never nice to Piers. I never even tried.”
A shadow settles over Griffin’s features, darkening his expression. “He was never nice to you. He never even tried!”
The anger in Griffin’s voice takes me aback. That’s not just a shadow in his eyes; that’s fury. Intense and blazing.
“That may be true,” I concede, “but he was also right about everything. I took Cassandra from him without even asking. I’ve put you, Carver, and Jocasta into dangerous situations again and again. And we’re not stopping now. It’s not over yet, and who knows what will happen. Today. Tomorrow. There’s still my mother to deal with. And Fisa. You may be the hand helping to guide this sword, but everyone—you, the Gods—you’ve all made it perfectly clear that I’m the tip of the blade. I’m going to have to start swinging now, and people will get cut. That’s war, and life, and there’s no way around it. Piers was scared for his family. He was completely justified in his worry. And in his anger toward me.”
Griffin swivels fully around and stares at me in disbelief. “So you have a conversation. You express your opinion, your opposition,” he growls. “You withdraw your support. You go live as a Gods damn bloody hermit if you want to. You do not try to banish your brother’s wife!”
I drop my gaze. “Your wife?”
He stands. “Yes, my wife. What kind of question is that?”
I glance back up, finding outrage and incomprehension on his face. “Do you… Do you think you would have loved me if the Gods hadn’t meddled?”
Griffin stares at me.
“I mean… I just—”
“I know what you mean,” he cuts in harshly.
My heart suddenly hammers in my chest. “You’ve told me you never really wanted anyone else—in a permanent way, at least—and then when you saw me, you knew I was the one. The one you wanted to claim, like you’d been waiting for me.” I curl my bare toes into the thick sheepskin rug, looking down again. “But it sounds like they made it that way, made you that way, made it inevitable. What if they forced—”
Griffin grabs my shoulders in a hard grip. I gasp, jerking my head back up.
He loosens his hold. “We’re not puppets, Cat. I have a mind of my own.”
“But they push. They shove. They suggest.” And Gods, don’t I know it. They’ve been doing it all my life.
“They don’t control my thoughts. They have no sway over my heart.”
“But what if they do?” I whisper, raising my hands to his chest. I don’t touch him, though. I curl my fingers into fists and then let my hands drop again. “We don’t know.”
Griffin gives me a gentle shake, urging me to look him in the eyes. “Then I don’t care. It is what it is. You are the missing part of me, and I am never giving you up.”
His truth burns through me. Heat thickens my throat, and tears prick at my eyes. Ever since Little Bean was conceived, I have the most aggravating propensity to cry. “But they changed you for me.”
“They gave me a gift that’s kept me alive. That got me Sinta and brought me to you.” He lightly squeezes my shoulders. “And it’s a good thing I’m indestructible where magic is concerned, because when you get excited, you light up the room like a storm.”
I bite my lower lip. I want to smile. I still feel like crying.
Griffin sweeps his hands down my arms. His skin is rough, his touch gentle. “Don’t doubt us, Cat. Don’t doubt me.”
I take a shaky breath. “I don’t. I just… I’m…” I stop, at a loss.
Griffin lifts his eyebrows. “Inarticulate at the moment?”
Scowling, I thwack him in the chest.
“Overwrought?” he supplies, his mouth quirking up.
I thwack him again.
“Highly emotional?”
Thwack. Thwack.
“Apparently weak, because none of that hurt at all.”
I give him the evil eye—a grumpy one.
Griffin smirks. It’s that confident, smug look I’ve come to know and love. “You need a man you can’t dominate? Someone you can’t overpower? Even with magic?” His eyes suddenly gleam silver in the lamplight, and a little flutter twirls through my middle.
I nod. And what a good idea that was. I’d have no interest in a man I could intimidate.
Griffin moves fast. One minute, I’m standing there. The next, I’m flying through the air. My back hits the bed, and before I even finish a bounce, Griffin’s hands slam down on either side of my head. He’s right above me—looming, caging, heavy, hot—and the way he looks down at me is both intensely dark and incredibly delicious.
A thrill darts through me. He still wants me.
His eyes glittering, Griffin pushes his knee between my thighs, spreading them. His strong arms bend, bringing his face closer to mine. The wall of sheer masculine power above me is intoxicating and sets my senses alight.
His breath whispers across my parted lips. “Can Little Bean handle rough?”
Excitement shoots like an arrow straight to the bull’s-eye between my legs. I wet my lips, nodding. “She’s sleeping. She’s strong.” And there’s nothing Griffin would ever do that would hurt her, or me.
“Good.”