“We run a big risk every day. It’s worth it.”
He drew me close. Usually, my body responded to his like tinder under a match, but today, his embrace felt different. It was warm and reassuring. I wanted to melt into him and never rise.
Two days later, I found her at the Bellingham and counted the bills out into her outstretched hand. We spoke almost no words. I longed to strike her, to shove her, to do something outrageous that would help the anguish on the inside come out. Instead, I did exactly as she asked and walked away. I could not deny her the money, but I could deny her my voice. If she truly had any motherly feelings remaining, that at least might give her pause. But she had never had much in the way of motherly feelings, so I had to take comfort in the fact that however my silence made her feel, it made me feel I had some kind of power remaining, and I needed that.
Three more days passed, then four, and there was no sign of my mother. It seemed she was keeping her word. She’d asked for a large enough sum that I expected it might keep her quiet for a good while. And since she only knew that I had a secret but not what it was, I knew what would happen next: she would come back and ask for more money. She wouldn’t reveal the secret before she knew who to sell it to—and for how much.
The real questions were how long that would take and whether we could get our business here completed before time ran out.
Chapter Twenty-Four
News
After discussing it at length, Tim and I decided that we needed to let Pinkerton know about the complication. Our only communication with him since our arrival had been our reports, all sent in the same direction, with not a single response to any of them, good or bad. So we sent a report with the detail about her threat and how I’d dealt with it, even though it had no direct bearing on our work with Mrs. Greenhow. And we waited to see what would happen.
Three days later, when there was a calling card from an E. J. Allen waiting at the desk for us, I put two and two together and said to Tim, “Allen? It must be Pinkerton.” And indeed it was.
We made arrangements for him to come to our rooms under cover of night, as we could talk most freely that way. He wore no uniform, and when he signed the ledger, he used another name entirely, a Mr. A. P. Egan. We did our best to confuse the issue, not speaking his name at all in the hallway and arriving at separate times. He walked with a cane, which I had not previously seen him do. I wasn’t sure whether it was in reaction to an injury he’d suffered since last we saw each other or just part of a disguise.
Once we were all in the room, I sat down on the bed, as there were only a few places to sit, and Tim took his seat next to me. His arm went around my back, whether automatically or not, I did not know. Pinkerton noticed immediately, and after our initial exchange of pleasantries was complete, he spoke up.
“Well,” said Pinkerton. “You two are certainly cozier than I would have expected.”
I looked at him and shrugged.
“We’re husband and wife as far as Washington is concerned,” I said. “We play our parts well.”
“And as far as real life is concerned?”
“Is there such a thing anymore?”
He looked at me, giving me an intense once-over, a thorough examination. Whatever he saw there, perhaps the firm set of my shoulders, made him grunt in displeasure. He turned to Tim.
“Bellamy,” he said. “Tell me the truth.”
Inside, I screamed at Tim not to tell. Nothing good could come of it. And somehow, I wanted to keep the secret for just the two of us, protected, sealed off from the world. But my unspoken words were, of course, unheard.
“Kate and I are engaged to be married,” said Tim.
At first, there was only a widening of the eyes to betray his feelings. Even that amount of reaction felt unexpected, and I began to fear what might be to come. The seconds slipped by in silence.
With a thin veneer of calm, Pinkerton asked, “I’m sorry, I thought you said—engaged, you say?”
Tim nodded.
With no further warning, Pinkerton stood, snapping, “It is not allowed!” It felt like a cannon had gone off in the room or a clap of thunder. I had seen a great deal from him over the years, and I had never seen him react like this.
“There’s no rule—” began Tim.
“I make the rules. And I will not allow it.”
“Allow?” I said acidly.
“Keep your tongue,” Pinkerton answered back, brandishing a finger in my direction.
“Don’t talk to her that way,” said Tim, beginning to step forward.
“I’ll talk to her how I like. And to you too.”
“This isn’t right,” Tim said. “If it were anyone else, you wouldn’t have word one to say.”
Pinkerton glared at him. He was far shorter than Tim but more solidly built and gave the impression of being ready to brawl. He gripped his cane. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“If it were Hattie. Or any other woman. You wouldn’t care. It isn’t about fraternization.”
“Of course it is,” said Pinkerton. He sounded convincing enough, but my head was in a whirl, so there was no knowing the truth of it, not in that moment.
“No,” said Tim. “It’s just Kate. You want her for yourself. You always have.”
I lost my breath. Could it be true?
“That is a lie and a slander, and I should cut you loose just for having the gall to say it,” said Pinkerton, speaking in a low growl.
“So do,” said Tim, not breaking.
“Damn firing you. I should fight you.”
I looked back and forth between the men. The two most important men in my life, dead set against each other, threatening violence. How could things have gone so wrong so fast?
“Then let’s,” Tim said with a snarl.
I didn’t know what to do, but I had to wade into the fray as best I could, which meant speaking up.
“Damn you both to hell,” I said. “Keep your voices down. What are you thinking? What if we’re heard?”