“Oh, Woodman,” she said, her voice thick with emotion. “I do love you.”
“I know you do. Like a best friend. Like a brother.”
She shrugged helplessly, a sudden memory of him taking her to the homecoming dance flashing through her mind. “And at times . . .”
She looked over at Woodman—at his blond hair and clean-shaven face. He was handsome and kind, and he’d do just about anything for her. Ending up with him would be a good life, a fine life, a life that would suit her far better than a life with Cain, and maybe, just maybe, if she let her dreams of Cain die, she could open her heart completely to Woodman.
Suddenly she remembered him giving her the charm bracelet for her twelfth birthday, how she’d felt a strange surge of attraction to Woodman, and again at the homecoming dance, when he’d saved her bacon and kissed her for the first time.
“There have been times,” she said softly, “when I thought I felt somethin’ more.”
“I love you,” he said, as though her words had given him the courage to say what he felt. “I’ve been in love with you for as long as I can remember.”
As the very words she’d wanted so desperately from Cain spilled from his cousin’s lips with such tenderness, such constant earnestness, a dam broke inside her, and tears of hurt and frustration streamed down her face.
“Woodman,” she sobbed.
“If you told me ‘no,’ Gin, if you told me ‘never,’ I’d leave you be. You know that, don’t you? It would damn near kill me, but I’d . . . I promise you, I’d walk away. But until you say those words, Ginger, I will keep hopin’ and keep waitin’ for you.”
She took a deep, sobbing breath beside him, grieving her lost chance with Cain today and feeling the strong pull to surrender to Woodman. How easy it would be to choose him, to build something with him. No more frustration and heartbreak. No one challenging her or asking her to jump. No more arms pushing her away, just pulling her into a warm and safe embrace.
“Gin,” he whispered, “are you in love with Cain?”
And just like that, her heart broke all over again, but this time, for Woodman.
Because she knew how painful it was for him to ask the question, and yet he asked it and he asked it kindly, his voice filled with love and understanding. Her shoulders trembled, and her chin fell forward to rest on her chest as she wept.
I love the wrong cousin. Oh God, help.
“Gin,” said Woodman, putting his finger under her chin and tilting her face up to look at him. His eyes were sad but kind as he looked down at her. “Cain is my cousin and I love him, but I just . . . I just don’t think he’s right for you.”
“Why?” she asked, finding that she was desperate for an answer. What’s so wrong with me that he can’t choose me?
“I see you with me, not him,” Woodman continued. “Darlin’, I’d be so good to you. Don’t you know that?”
She nodded, tears streaming down her face because of course she knew it was true. It had always been true. He reached down and took her hand, placing it directly over his heart.
“You can have this heart to break,” he said softly, his voice gravelly with emotion, “if there’s even the smallest chance you might want it someday. Because here is what I know: even if you can’t ever give me yours, mine already belongs to you.”
And inside Ginger’s heart, something gave way. Something happened that she hadn’t expected or seen coming: a tectonic shift of broken, shattered plates. It wasn’t that she suddenly loved Woodman in the wild, passionate way she’d always loved Cain, but for just a moment, her heart recognized him as more than he’d ever been before. And after the beating her heart had borne earlier in the day, it felt like a blessed relief.
When she raised her eyes, she tried to smile at him, but more tears spilled over. “God damn it, Josiah. Why’re you s-so good to me?”
“Why’s the sky blue, Ginger?” he asked, raising her hand to his lips and kissing the underside of her wrist before entwining his fingers through hers. “Because it don’t know no other way to be.”
“I’m so tired,” she said honestly, letting her head fall to his shoulder. She took a deep, ragged breath that shook her whole body, and he put his strong arm around her, pulling her into his side and resting his head on top of hers.
And in Woodman’s arms, she found a profound and unexpected peace at the end of a long and emotionally exhausting day. In Woodman’s arms, there was unconditional love, support, admiration, and acceptance. In Woodman’s arms, she was safe and wanted. And right now? Right this minute, in the wake of Cain’s devastating rejection? Safe and wanted felt good, felt right, felt like the right path for her future, for her whole life.
“Then you go ahead and rest,” he said. “I’m not goin’ anywhere, Gin. My heart belongs to you. If you’re ever ready to give me yours, well, you come find me, darlin’. I’ll be waitin’.”