“If I were five years younger or you were a few years older, nothing could keep me away from you, but…we’re not. I can’t go where this is heading.”
My heart is galloping in my chest at his admission. “So, when I’m eighteen…?”
And there’s that repulsed grimace again. I can’t reconcile it with his words…his body language. He seems to want me on every level except his head, which is disgusted by the idea.
I feel intense heat rise to my face and know I’m blushing. “Sorry,” I say with a wave of my hand, backing toward the locker room before he can see. “Stupid question. Don’t answer that.”
I duck into the locker room and walk with my head down to my locker, even though there’s no one else around.
Chapter 15
Marcus
I’ve lost my mind. I’m convinced it started that day on the park bench after Blaire’s wedding. I’ve been unraveling so slowly I didn’t even realize it. But as I watch Addie vanish into the girls’ locker room with her head down, as if she’s done something wrong, I know I’m totally undone. Because all I can think about is going in there and finishing what we started.
But I’ve already let it go too far.
Once the door closes behind her, I dive into the pool to cool off. I sink to the bottom and sit there, watching bubbles rise in a steady stream as I slowly exhale. I close my eyes and let the water slowly lift me, and when I break the surface, I roll face down and start to swim hard. Several laps later, when I feel like I might have my shit together, I climb out of the pool and dry off.
When I look up, Addie is on the bleachers, watching me. Even fully dressed in a hoodie and jeans, the sight of her does something to me. Something that’s totally out of my control.
And wrong.
I keep my eyes anywhere but on her as I move her direction. “Do you need a ride?”
I know I’m treading into dangerous territory by asking, but we need to clear the air. If I can keep it together long enough to get her dropped off, that will prove to both of us what happened was an isolated mistake.
She pushes to her feet. “I’ll walk.”
“Addie,” I say as she turns for the gate, and the desperation I thought I could control comes through in the word loud and clear.
She turns back to face me, and never in my life have I wanted to kiss someone as much as I want to kiss her. Because I don’t remember anyone’s kiss ever stealing my breath the way hers just did.
“Let me drive you home.”
For several seconds her eyes search mine, and what I’m just now discovering is I’ve got no defenses when it comes to Addie. I know from the way her cheeks get pink and her breathing gets a little uneven that she sees the unbridled need in my gaze. I can’t hide it from her anymore.
She swallows and lowers her eyes, as if embarrassed by what she does to me. “Okay.”
I tug on my T-shirt as she starts toward the gate, and I can’t help watching her go. She’s so fucking sexy. I tear my eyes away and grab my duffel, then follow her and lock the gate. I’m careful to keep a safe distance between us on the way to my truck. But as I step into the parking lot, suddenly my heart’s beating in my throat. Because even in the dim streetlights, there’s no mistaking the white BMW parked across from my truck.
My feet stall on the pavement and Addie slows next to me. I hear her inhale sharply when she notices why I’ve stopped.
“Whose car—” she starts in a whisper, but I give her a subtle shake of my head and she stops.
I force my feet to start moving and discover Addie thinks one hell of a lot faster on her feet than I do.
“Thanks for opening the cage for me, Coach,” she says, her voice just loud enough that anyone lurking close by will be able to hear. “The extra swim really helped.”
My feet stall again and I turn to find her moving up the walkway toward the front of the school.
She gives me a wave. “See you at practice tomorrow.”
I don’t respond. I can’t, because all kinds of images of tomorrow are springing to my mind—holding her, kissing her.
Things I can’t do with her ever again.
As I watch her form retreat into the dark, another materializes at the foot of the path back toward the pool.
Deanna stalks toward me, a skeptical smirk decorating her face and her arms crossed tightly over her chest. “A little late for a swim, don’t you think…Coach?”
I turn and start toward my car again, because if I don’t move right now, my panic is going to freeze me solid. “She missed a lot of pool time with her concussion. She’s a driven kid…trying to get back in condition so she’ll be ready to play when the doctor clears her for contact.”
Deanna skips up to my side and at the word “contact” her eyebrow raises. “So this little evening swim has nothing to do with why you left me half-naked at my house last week?”
I shake my head and try to look annoyed rather than let her see the dread filling my gut. “What are you doing here, Deanna?”