Mark snaps his fingers in my face. “Don’t say that. Don’t you ever say that.” He looks left and right down the hall, as if he’s worried someone might have overheard me daring to express enthusiasm for my part. “What’re you doing out here, anyway?”
I hesitate. I have to just lay it out for him—no ExcelsiCon. No way. Because instead of wandering the aisles and waiting for autographs, it’ll be photos. Aching, smiling muscles. Flash blindness. Carpal Tunnel. Fake friends pretending they know me. And dredging up bad memories. That’s not what I want from a con.
“Well…,” I begin. “I kinda want to talk to you about the—”
“Where’s Gail?”
Once again I thumb toward the door.
He mutters something under his breath and adjusts his cufflinks. “I’m not paying her for panic attacks.”
“She’s had a long day.”
“I’ve had a long day. You’ve had a long day. And it isn’t even Monday.”
“Actually it is—”
“The press junkets after filming are supposed to be the tough-as-balls part, not this,” he goes on. “This was supposed to be easy.”
“It was pretty easy for Fishmouth to get onstage,” I point out. “Actually, I want to talk to you about—”
“Can it wait?” he interrupts, pulling out his phone. It dings again. Either an email or a text, I don’t know. “I’m gonna handle this. Why don’t you go get some lunch, yeah? We can talk about it later, promise.”
My shoulders slump. Whatever the opposite of promise-sworn is, that’s Mark. Later is never going to come. “Yeah.”
“Good. Oh—and Darien?”
“Yeah?”
“Diet. Don’t forget. I think the third floor has a cafeteria.”
I make a face. “Cafeteria food? That’s cardboard, bro.”
“Bro, get a salad.”
I purse my lips. With my new workout regimen and my personal trainer (who reminds me of Wolverine with the personality of a wet cat…so basically just Wolverine), I’ve existed on protein shakes and rabbit food. And chicken. So much chicken I could sprout feathers. And it’s not even seasoned. All to keep me looking like the however many million dollars my body’s apparently worth.
David Singh—the original Federation Prince—never had to worry about crunches, or cardio, or airbrushing, or fangirl ambushes on live TV. The original Starfield show barely made the ratings, and yet it somehow inspired a cult following. He got fans for his work, for inspiring people to think bigger than the Earth and ignite the stars.
I get fans for my abs.
If I were David Singh, if I were really Carmindor, I’d tell Mark to shove off. Diplomatically, of course. And he’d listen, and I’d go get a burger down at Shake Shack.
But I’m not Carmindor. Not in this universe, anyway.
—
THE CAFETERIA ON THE THIRD FLOOR is worse than cardboard. It’s an entire table of absolute gluttony and sin. Because doughnuts. Nothing but doughnuts. Doughnuts as far as the eye can see. And sitting to the side, like an emo kid in a high school cafeteria, is one sad and lonely fruit cup.
“It’s you and me, buddy.” I take the fruit cup and find a table.
There’s a few other people eating breakfast—doughnuts, to be exact—but I bypass them all to the far corner of the cafeteria. It overlooks Rockefeller Center. The blue and silver Starfield crowd has almost dissipated. It’s hard to think they all came for me. Me. My stomach twists, and it has nothing to do with the fruit cup.
I give a pineapple chunk a poke. Out of the corner of my eye, I notice a guy walking toward me. The one who until a moment ago was eating a heavenly looking chocolate-sprinkled doughnut. He’s older than I am, with thick-rimmed glasses and a sweat mustache.
“Hey,” he says. “You’re Darien Freeman.”
People say this to you all the time when you’re famous. What do they expect me to say back—Yeah, you caught me. Instead, I just stick out a hand to shake. “Hi there. Nice to meet you.”
He doesn’t take my hand. “Great show today.”
I know sarcasm when I hear it. “Thanks, man,” I reply, giving him a tight-lipped smile.
“Me and some of my PA buddies were just talking about it.” He leans in a little closer. “Can I ask you a question? Just between us.”
I don’t like where this is going, but there’s no way for me to say no, is there? And Gail isn’t here to distract him while I make a break for the door. I shift uncomfortably. “Uh, sure.”
“Do you actually know anything about Starfield?”
My eyebrows shoot up.
“Because you might have all those Seaside fans fooled, but they wouldn’t know a decent TV show if it hit them upside the head. I bet you couldn’t even tell Carmindor from Captain Kirk.”
It’s not a question. He just assumes.
“You know, there’s a lot of us who actually love Starfield. It’s not a fad. Or a cash cow. It’s not just a chance for you to get your face on a billboard. It matters to people. So don’t ruin it, dude.” He starts to walk away, then stops and half-turns back to me. “Oh, and just so you know, I’m not the only one who thinks it. You’re a joke.”
“I’ve never been good at jokes.” I try to crack a smile. “I’m not that funny.”
He doesn’t smile back. “Starfield isn’t a game to us. We’re a family, not a franchise. Just look online.”
Then he stalks away before I can even formulate a polite, movie-star-worthy reply.
I clench my fork. I want to grab him by his starched shirt collar, turn him around, and shove the promise-sworn salute—pointer and pinky fingers out, middle two together, thumb down—into his eye sockets. And while I have his attention I want to lay down in excruciating detail the synopsis of all fifty-four episodes I watched religiously as a nobody teenager in the suburbs of L.A. From the Nox King to Princess Amara to every moon orbiting Galactic Six and every dwarf planet from the Helix Nebula to Andromeda. I want to tell him what that ending monologue meant to me. What it meant to see someone who looked like me in command of the Prospero. I want to cut out my fanboy heart and show him that it bleeds like every other Stargunner’s. I want to tell him that the Federation Prince Carmindor saved my life.
But I don’t. Because Mark is in the back of my head saying, Don’t lose your cool. Follow the director. Cash the check. Be a star. And more than anything: Don’t become a headline.
“Just look online,” the so-called “true fan” had said. I push aside my depressing fruit cup and pull out my phone so I can search for whatever he was talking about. Did some A-lister tweet about me? Or did one of the gossip websites put something out already?
It doesn’t take long. A few searches through Starfield-related hashtags and I’ve found it. A blog post, linked to by one of the bigger social media outlets, entitled “FAN-TASTIC OR FAN-SERVICE?”
Against my better judgment, I open the link.
The choice of teen heartthrob Darien Freeman as the noble Carmindor can only be seen as a slight against the true Starfield fans.