"Right, right."
"What the fuck is going on with you Trent? This isn't like you. Even at your worst you didn't let things get this bad."
He pointed at me, accusation written all over his face.
"You used to be fun."
"Aw man, that hurts."
"Yeah well, you are going to end up in rehab if you don't straighten this shit out."
Sofia brought in two cups of coffee, setting them on the coffee table. She made a clucking sound with her tongue. I stared at mine, still wincing from the sun. Then I reached for it, sipping it gingerly.
It was too hot but I didn't care.
The burning feeling on my tongue was more than I deserved.
And it was the first thing I'd felt since Lexi got out of the limo.
"I can't."
"What?"
"I can't straighten this out. I fucked up too bad."
He sat down on the floor beside me, slapping his hand onto my shoulder.
"Whatever it is man, we can fix it. I swear."
"She'll never forgive me."
"Who? The maid? Of course she will."
I shook my head, sending the room spinning.
"No. Lexi."
"Who is Lexi?"
I looked up at Joss. He was a huge guy, taller than me even. But he had a good heart. Not that anyone really knew that. Only us guys that had served together.
He was family. My only family.
Maybe he would understand.
"I love her man. But she didn't want me so I fucked her. Actually, I wouldn't fuck her. That was the worst part."
"I'm not following T."
I swallowed the burning coffee and reached for the other cup.
"You mind?"
"Be my guest."
I downed the second cup and my mind started to clear.
Then I started talking.
Lexi
I swallowed, trying to ignore the queasy feeling in the pit of my stomach. It was almost a welcome changed from the haze of misery I'd been in. Only now I was nauseous and miserable.
Perfect.
Three weeks. It had been three weeks since I saw Trent. Since that horrible weekend in Hawaii.
That horrible, wonderful weekend. The weekend that had changed everything. The weekend that had changed me.
Now I knew about all the different ways my body could be used to make me feel good.
And to make me feel very, very bad.
I bent forward, rinsing a post-surgical wound. I flinched at the smell, nausea rising sharply in my throat. I stepped back, covering my mouth with the back of my hand.
"Alexandra?"
Dr. Bellamy was watching me. He gestured me out into the hallway, away from the patient.
"Are you alright?"
"There was a terrible smell. I don't understand it."
He walked back into the room, inspecting the wound.
"I see nothing wrong here."
He glanced at me, frowning.
"Kelly can you finish this up please. I'd like to have a word with Alexandra in my office."
I followed him calmly. I was numb inside. But I knew something was terribly wrong.
"Please have a seat."
I swallowed, the feeling of nausea still in my throat.
"We've come across something... troubling on the security footage. I haven't been sure exactly what measures to take. I did my best to protect you, but there is only so much I can do. I was going to wait until the end of the week, but we might as well get this over with now."
He leaned forward, his eyes on mine.
"Did you disappear into a supply closet with a patient during work hours?"
Oh God.
I inhaled sharply. I knew I would pay for my stupidity. For my naiveté. For wanting what I shouldn't.
For wanting him.
"Yes."
"For what purpose?"
"He-I don't know how to explain it. It was... a game."
"Was it sexual in nature?"
I lowered my eyes. My voice was low and ashamed. I felt stupid. Of course I had been caught. I never should have played along with Trent.
The truth was, I hadn't been able to stop myself.
"Yes."
"You know we can't keep you here after this."
I should ask for understanding. Forgiveness. I should be crying.
My whole life was shattering in front of my eyes.
Instead I was numb. None of this was a surprise to me. Deep down, I'd known this was coming.
"I understand."
"You are an excellent nurse Lexi. Other than this lapse in judgment. Can you assure me it won't happen at your next job?"
"Yes, of course."
"Then you will receive a positive recommendation from me."
"Thank you, Doctor."
"You may collect your things."
I stood, my hand on the back the chair to support me. I felt as if I might fall down.
"Oh and Alexandra?"
"Yes?"
"You might want to take a pregnancy test."
My eyes snapped open and I stared at him, shock written all over my face. He raised an eyebrow.
"Your heightened sense of smell. I've seen it a hundred times. It's especially hard for nurses who are expecting. Maybe this is a blessing."
I closed my eyes and nodded. He was right of course. That's why I could smell everything. That's why I was on the verge of vomiting right now.
I'd assumed that Trent had a vasectomy. It was in his chart. But those reversed themselves all the time. He must have assumed I was on the pill. Or he had not cared either way.