I downed my bourbon and another drink magically appeared in front of me. We drank for free here, which was dangerous for some of the guys. I never lost control but tonight I really wanted to lose myself in oblivion.
A pretty blond sidled up to me. She'd been making eyes at me all night. I guess she got tired of waiting for to me to react.
"Hey. I'm Lindsay."
I barely glanced at her. She was attractive, but she didn't hold a candle to Belinda. Plus, I didn't like the way she was spilling out of her tank top.
Or her thick lipgloss. Or the heavy makeup on her eyes.
Hell, I didn't like one Goddamn thing about her.
I heaved a sigh.
"I'm not in the mood."
She gave me a hostile look and tossed her hair.
"The mood for what?"
"Whatever it is you are offering me."
"Wow, you must think you are hot shit don't you?"
"Not really. Like I said, I'm just not in the mood."
She tucked something into my jacket pocket.
"Fine. Just remember you have this. If you ever are in the mood."
I ignored her and started talking to a player on my other side. I wasn't usually rude to girls, no matter how trashy they were. Hell, sometimes I liked trashy. Or I used to. Before Belinda clipped my wings.
"You met Lindsay, eh?"
I glanced at Ben, one of the wide receivers. He was the one who scored that first touchdown tonight. A bunch of them actually.
"She gets around?"
"Oh yeah. But only if you are winning."
I grunted.
"I'm not interested."
"Got a girl, huh?"
I nodded.
"She's hot?"
"She is a pain in the ass."
He laughed and slapped my back.
"Well from what I've heard, Lindsay is well worth it."
"What, you never hit that?"
"Hell no. I'm married. My wife isn't exactly the understanding type."
Ben held up his left hand and wiggled it. It was funny, but my first thought wasn't surprise that a junior in college was married. It was envy.
"How long have you been married?"
"One year of marital fucking bliss. She's the love of my life dude. No mistake about that."
I lifted my drink to toast him and we clinked glasses.
"Congrats, man."
I tipped my drink back and swallowed. I hadn't ever thought about getting married before. But right now, knowing that Belinda was waiting at home for me... that she was mine, for reals? Well, fuck.
That sounded real fucking nice.
Better than nice.
It sounded like a Goddamn miracle.
He slapped my back again. I almost choked on my drink. Ben was strong.
"You're next dude."
"Why do you say that?"
"Trust me, I can just tell."
I smiled grimly. I had to get the girl to actually go out with me before any of that. Go out with me and lay down with me.
But maybe... if I played my cards right... if things didn't go to hell the way they usually did... I might just put a ring on it.
I smiled and pushed away my drink, ordering a coffee. I had somewhere to be. And I needed to be sober for it.
Belinda
I bent over my computer, staring at the list of available transfers. This late in the semester, there weren't many. I was lucky there was anything open to be honest. I was going to have to apply to everything and just pray.
There was a program in London that was full. The one in Sweden appeared to still be accepting applications. I chewed my lip. That might be too far. Then again, Sweden did sound nice.
I gave up and spent an hour sending notes to the heads of all the remote locations. Washington was still the most appealing with it's environmental forestry program and remote setting. Although, being pregnant in the middle of a redwood forest might have its disadvantages.
Never mind actually giving birth.
I was trying not to think about that part just yet.
I got up and made myself a cup of roobios tea. Supposedly it was good for the baby. And since I couldn't have any coffee or caffeinated tea, I had to find a substitute. Actually, the more I read, the more things I had to worry about.
For example, I needed extra B vitamins because I was vegan.
Then there was mercury in fish (which I didn't eat) and lead in the water and BPA in plastic bottles and containers, never mind watching out for food poisoning! Also off limits was heavy lifting now or getting too hot or letting my pulse get too fast.
The list went on and on.
I'd downloaded a bunch of pregnancy books to my e-reader. I spent every spare moment reading and learning everything I could. It was password protected so no one had to know what was on there. I'd even put my prenatal vitamins into an empty bottle of vitamin C.
I felt like a spy on a top secret mission. But the mission was just looking out for a person who didn't even exist yet, outside of my body. It didn't matter though. This was the most important thing I'd done in my life, and I was going to do the best I could no matter what.
At the moment, I had decided that no one was ever going to know about this baby, unless I decided they should. Not until it was too late. And even then, only my parents had to know. I planned to tell them over the phone. Or email.
Surprise! You're grandparents!
I sighed. That was not going to go over well. Maybe if they hadn't been so strict I would have told them. But as it was...
PING