“Total asshole move,” he said. “But this situation is dire.”
He sped through back roads and dangerously ran yellow lights. He cut a few people off and honked at them as he drove by to apologize. I directed him under unfamiliar overpasses, found unheard-of drives and lanes for him to traverse, and when we finally parked the car in front of Scoops Gelato Shop, it was 6:01 p.m. Ben ran to the door just as they were locking it.
He pounded on it politely. “Please,” he said, “just . . . can you open the door?”
A young Korean girl came to the door and pointed to the Closed sign. She shook her head.
Ben put his hands together in a prayer position, and she shrugged at him.
“Elsie, do me a favor, would you?”
“Hmm?” I said. I was hanging further back on the sidewalk.
“Would you turn around?”
“Turn around?”
“I’m about to beg on my knees and I don’t want you to see it. I want you to think of me as a strong, virile, confident man.”
I laughed, and he continued to look at me blankly.
“Oh my God, you’re serious,” I said, as I laughed and resigned myself to turning around.
I looked out onto the main street in the distance. I watched cars stop at red lights and cyclists speed by them. I saw a couple walking down the street with a baby stroller. Soon, I heard the jingle of a door opening and I started to turn around.
“Wait!” I heard Ben say. “Don’t move yet,” and so I didn’t.
Two minutes later, the door jingled again and Ben came around in front of me. In his hands were two cups of gelato, both a light brown with brightly colored spoons sticking out of them.
“How did you do that?” I asked, taking one of them from him.
Ben smiled. “I have my ways.”
“Seriously,” I said.
“Seriously? I bribed her.”
“You bribed her?” I asked, shocked. I had never known anyone to bribe someone before.
“Well, I said, ‘If you can give me two cups of whatever flavor you have left, I’ll give you twenty bucks extra.’ So if that’s a bribe, then yes, I bribed her.”
“Yeah, I’d say that’s a bribe.”
“Somewhat corrupt,” he said to me. “I hope you can forgive me.”
I stared at him for a moment. “Forgive you? Are you kidding? No one has ever bribed anyone for me before!” I said.
Ben laughed. “Now you’re just making fun of me.”
“No,” I said. “I’m entirely serious. I think it’s hugely flattering.”
“Oh,” he said, smiling. He laughed. “Awesome.” Then he took a bite of his gelato and immediately grimaced. “It’s coffee,” he said, as he ran to the trash can on the sidewalk and spit it out.
“You don’t like coffee?”
“Coffee is like doctors’ visits and NPR to me,” he said.
I took his cup from his hand and held it in the palm of mine while I ate from the other. “More for me, then,” I said.
We got back in his car, and neither one of us knew quite what to do next.
“The day doesn’t have to end,” I said. “Does it?”
“I’m glad you said that,” Ben responded. “Where to next?”
“Well, I don’t know,” I said. “I’m not really hungry . . . ”
“What if we go back to your place?” he suggested. “I promise I won’t get handsy.”
I let it sit in the air for a minute. “What’s wrong with handsy?” I teased him. He didn’t even say anything; he just threw the car in reverse and started speeding down the street.
When we got back to my apartment, Ben took my keys out of his pocket. We walked up the stairs to my door, but halfway up the stairs, Ben realized he’d forgotten something. He quickly ran back down to his car and put money in the parking meter. Then, he flashed back up the stairs to meet me and unlocked my door. Once inside, he gingerly placed the keys on my table by the door.
“They’re right here when you need them,” he said. “Is that a good place to remember them?”
“That’s fine. Do you want anything to drink?”
“Oh, sure. What do you have?”