Forever, Again

She smiled broadly. “Hello, Lily, I’m Gina. I’ll be taking care of you. Won’t you come this way?”

My mouth was opening and closing as I tried to form words, but each attempt got stuck in my throat. I felt wobbly and unsteady and didn’t know if I could walk. Sweat broke out across my brow, and I wondered if I was having yet another panic attack.

Gina seemed to notice because she stopped, pivoted back to me, and cupped my elbows. “Sweetheart, you don’t look so good. Are you okay?”

Her touch was my undoing. I felt my knees give out and I sort of sagged against her. She managed to catch me, and I heard her call for her assistant. Another pair of hands got under me, and they eased me to a sitting position on the floor.

Gina swept my hair back from my face and studied me. “Lily, can you hear me okay?”

I managed a nod.

She put a hand to my forehead and said, “You’re very pale; are you sick?”

“No,” I whispered. I didn’t feel feverish, just…overwhelmed. But from what? What had caused this ridiculous and humiliating reaction? I couldn’t imagine what Gina and the other girl must be thinking. Still, I leaned into the cool of the stylist’s palm and closed my eyes for a minute.

“Rebecca, go to the back and bring me a glass of ice water and a damp washcloth.” I heard the girl behind me scramble to her feet and hurry away.

“I’m sorry,” I told Gina, so embarrassed I could hardly stand it.

“Shhh,” she said gently. “Honey, did you have anything to eat today?”

I opened my eyes and leaned away from her to show her I was better. “I had a big sandwich for dinner. I’m sorry; I think it’s because I haven’t been sleeping.”

She laid a hand on my shoulder. “Oh, well, I know all about how that can mess you up.”

Rebecca came back with the water and the wet washcloth. Gina took both and offered me the water. I took a few sips, breathed in deeply a few more times, and let Gina pat at my forehead and cheeks with the washcloth. Her touch was kind and gentle.

“Thanks,” I told her. “I think I’m okay.”

Gina stood and leaned down to take my arm and help me up, even though I felt fine again. “Did you want to go home and rest?” she asked me. “I can call your grandmother to have Arthur come get you.”

I was surprised that she knew Arthur, but then, maybe Grandmother had mentioned him over the years. “I really am fine now,” I told her.

She studied me for a moment.

“You do look better. At least you’ve got color back in your cheeks. Why don’t you come over to my chair and sit awhile, though, okay? We can play with your hair, and if you start to feel dizzy again, you tell me and we’ll send for Arthur.”

“Okay,” I said, allowing her to lead me over to a mirror.

After easing me into a seat and sending Rebecca to get me a smock, Gina began to run her fingers through my hair and asked me what I had in mind.

I told her that I just wanted to add some highlights, and I watched in the mirror as her lips pursed in a way that said she might have other ideas.

“You know,” she said, “this style isn’t doing you any favors. Have you always worn it so long without layers?”

I gulped and nodded. My hair was down to the middle of my back and I’d always worn it like that; one length, no bangs, and long. I had a feeling she wanted me to let her change it, and change can be hard for me. Plus, I’d had so much of that lately.

Gina must’ve picked up on my reservations because she said, “Lily, you have a lot of things going for you—these cheekbones, that gorgeous skin, those bright-green eyes—but this cut and this color isn’t showing any of that off. If you’ll trust me, I promise to turn you into a goddess. I swear; I’m good.”

There was just something about how confident she sounded, because in the next moment I heard myself consenting. “Okay. If you promise.”

She beamed at me. “Just wait till you see yourself, honey.”

With that, she gave me a pat and told me she was off to mix up some color. I was left to stare at the now entirely empty salon. And then I remembered what Rebecca had said, that the placed closed at seven. Immediately, I felt ashamed as it dawned on me that Grandmother had probably thrown her weight around to get Gina to agree to see me tonight. I should’ve taken the opportunity to leave when Gina had offered it, if for no other reason than to spare her from working past closing.

When Gina came back with a roller table topped with bowls of dark hair color and brushes, I was quick to apologize.

“I’m really sorry about the time. I didn’t realize you’d have to work late to see me.”

“Don’t sweat it,” she said easily as she swirled the color around with one of the brushes.

“My grandmother is pretty used to getting her way,” I said a little bitterly.

Gina stopped swirling, looked at me, and said, “I owe your grandmother a tremendous debt of gratitude, Lily. It was nothing to accommodate you after all she’s done for me.”

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