We both glanced at FuDing, who was creating a pile of dead insects, and then quickly looked away. My eyes filled with tears. I had known that these lessons would not continue forever, but now that they were ending, I felt I could not bear it.
“You have learned much, Lingsi,” Teacher said to me kindly. “You are a very smart and clever pupil. If you had been a boy, I have no doubt you would have won honors at the Imperial Examination.”
I tried to smile but could only bow my head. I felt Teacher’s hand gently rest upon it.
“Mencius, the Second Sage, said that there are three joys in this world,” he said. “Health, a clear conscience, and teaching those who are worthy. Teaching you has been a joy, Lingsi.”
My tears continued to drop long after our last lesson, long after Teacher had left the House of Li and I had swept up FuDing’s collection of insects. They even continued as I scrubbed the pots in the kitchen, much to the annoyance of the other servants.
“Stop your crying,” Bisi snapped, carrying over dirty bowls for me to wash. “We’ve got enough to do without listening to your sniffling.”
“Look at me,” Shuwan said. “I have to prepare lunch boxes for the entire household, and am I wailing? And Haobo and Mugang and all the men have to prepare the sedan chairs and get ready to carry fat FuDing for hours tomorrow, and they aren’t crying, either. So your sniveling is not welcome!”
I gulped and rubbed my face with my sleeve. “Why are we getting lunch boxes and sedan chairs ready?” I asked. “Where is the family going?”
“Where are we all going, you mean,” Bisi said. “They’re taking all of us this time—even you.”
“Me?” I asked, surprised. I had assumed that Mrs. Li and the family were going on an extravagant picnic or visiting Aunt Xue or some other rich cousins’ mansion. “Where? Why?”
“It’s the first of the month, stupid!” Bisi said. “You may have gotten all those fancy lessons and learned to read, but you’re still not very smart. They are taking us to the temple service, of course.”
“But the Temple of Longevity is not hours—” I began.
“We’re not going to the Temple of Longevity,” Bisi said with exasperation, but I could see that her frustration was more about the inconvenience than it was for me. “We’re off to the Infinite Stream Temple this time.”
“That huge gold temple by the ocean?” I said. “Why?”
“For FuDing, of course,” Shuwan said. “Mrs. Li hopes she can get the abbot to be a matchmaker for him. Infinite Stream Temple! That’s why it has so much money—it gets an infinite stream of bribes.”
“She’ll need an elephant’s weight of gold to get a matchmaker for FuDing,” Bisi grunted. “No matchmaker is going to arrange a marriage with a well-born girl to that rice bucket. You’d think Mrs. Li would know that.”
“She does. Mrs. Li is no fool! Why do you think—” Shuwan stopped, and both servants looked at me oddly.
“What?” I asked. As the silence grew longer, I put down the teapot I was washing and glared at them. “What?” I demanded. “Tell me!”
“By the time FuDing was seven, everyone knew he was a brute as well as an idiot,” Shuwan said. “And Mrs. Li knew that he might have a hard time finding a bride….”
“Why do you think Mrs. Li was so desperate for you, the granddaughter of a scholar?” Bisi said. “She could’ve gotten any peasant’s kid for cheaper and without any silly promises. She wanted a girl of good blood, just in case.”
I stared. If Mrs. Li couldn’t find a suitable bride, I was going to have to marry FuDing? Me? I felt as if I had eaten spoiled fish.
“You’re not marrying age yet,” Shuwan said, trying to be kind. “You have a couple of years. That’s why Mrs. Li is trying to find FuDing a bride now. She’s hoping she can get someone else to marry FuDing before you have to.”
“Though I’d say that’s a pretty bleak hope!” Bisi sniffed.
I thought of FuDing and his hairy fingers that were too clumsy to hold a paintbrush but so adept at torturing bugs. If I had listened more carefully, would I have heard their silent screams? Tears of horror filled my eyes.
Shuwan heaved an impatient sigh. “You made her cry again!” she complained.
“Well,” Bisi retorted, “at least this time she’s got a good reason.”
—
The next morning, the streets around the House of Li overflowed with servants, horses, and sedan chairs. Mrs. Li’s chair was so large that it needed four men on either side to carry it. FuDing’s was not as large, but he was so heavy that the same number of men were needed to carry him. Then the cousins and aunts filled the carriages, and the horses were burdened with the supplies and gifts. Shuwan, Bisi, and I were to share a donkey, with the agreement that we would take turns riding, even though I had doubts about when my turn would be.