I shake my head, shocked at his earnings.
We leave a silence. I think of the holiday home I stayed in, the yacht we partied on, the elaborate parties, the endless food and drink. I feel sick that it was funded by his crusade to better his own life. Has it been for justice, as he says, or for money?
“So what is she having you do, then?”
I note that he never says Alpha’s name. “I don’t know. She wanted me to come here. She was about to make me speak, but then the Whistleblowers arrived. Thankfully. Didn’t think I’d ever hear myself say that.”
“Not a fan of speeches?”
“Not when I don’t know what I’m talking about.”
“They’re the very people who usually love them,” he says, and we laugh again. “Actions speak louder than words, remember that. Not everyone is made for podiums and microphones. I suggest you find a partner, a Flawed one, that’s best, easier, yes. You can live by the same rules, nice and balanced, two Flawed make perfect. Fall in love. Settle down. Make babies. Cherish them. Live your life.”
“I can’t have a family with a Flawed person.”
“Of course you can; they just say that you may not.”
“That doesn’t sound like an easy life. I thought you said not to cause trouble.”
“Did I say that?” He looks at me again.
I think about it, and then I shake my head.
“No. Indeed. I said actions speak louder than words. Don’t talk about it. Do it. All of them upstairs, her included, though I love her, all they do is talk. You do. That’s why they found you. Will cling to you. Will make you do for them. No. You do for you.” He stands up and comes around the desk to me. He takes my hand and bows theatrically. “Ms. North, a pleasure. You are even more beautiful in the flesh than they describe in the daily rags.”
I smile. “Take care of yourself,” I say gently. “They’ll test you tonight.”
“Indeed, they always do, but there are ways around them. You’ll find that out. Who’s your Whistleblower?”
“Mary May.”
“Oooh.” He winces. “Can’t say I envy you. No way around her. My life shuddered forward again the day she left here. Rattling along like a rusted ghost train, but at least it’s moving. Like I say, look to your strengths, look to your heroes for guidance. I’m a scientist. That helps me.” He salutes and makes his way back to the hidden door. “Don’t tell her that you saw me.”
“Why?”
“Just don’t. It will worry her. She never knows what I’m going to say. Good luck.” He opens the door and, as if remembering something, turns around. I try to see past him into the other room, and when I look in, I freeze in terror.
There’s a Whistleblower.
SIXTY
BILL NOTICES THE look on my face and turns to the Whistleblower, who is standing in the doorway and doesn’t see me—for now, anyway.
“Marcus,” he says, his tone friendlier than I expected. “What’s going on up there?”
Marcus the Whistleblower shakes his head and runs his hands through his hair. “Crevan has them all panicking. Everyone’s turning on one another. Flawed, unflawed. Whistleblowers, with each other. It’s a mess.” He suddenly sees me and stops talking. He turns and walks away, out of view.
“Marcus is shy,” Bill whispers loudly to me.
I am so stunned by how he and the Whistleblower have just conversed. The Whistleblower is on our side?
Bill comes back over to me. “She told me about your search, you know,” he says. “I’d like to see him again, too. I liked him.”
I’m unable to keep up. Liked whom?
“Almost as much as she did. We never had children, she and I. I suspect she’s told you that already. He was the first one they allowed to live here after years of her begging. It was difficult for her because of me, of course, but she proved herself over the years. They told her a year in advance that he’d be coming here. They like to vet the families, you see, prepare them, make sure they’ll follow on in their teachings. She visited him a few times in there, struck up a friendship, and she counted down the days to his graduation, even watched him graduate. We thought he’d like it here; he seemed to like it here. But then he just upped and left, never said good-bye. I think that’s what hurt her the most. She could have helped him, but he didn’t give her the chance. He never learned what she was capable of or what she was planning. He might have stayed if he’d known. She very quickly grew attached to him. So did I, but mostly because I just liked seeing her so happy.” His eyes fill. “If you see Carrick, tell him to visit us again. Tell him I’m sorry it ended like it did.”