Her body relaxes into mine. My palm skims her bare arm, slides to her shoulder, my thumb playing over her clavicle, her jaw, caressing her neck, deepening our connection. She’s warm, soft, beautiful as she falls into it with me. I can’t help wishing we were anywhere but here as our labored breathing fills the space around us, the kiss stretching out, my pulse thrashing in my chest, the moment ready to drown me.
In the back of my mind I realize there’s no more pull from her, no sense of her feeding from me. And I’m stunned at her control when I have none. She touches my face, her fingertips delicate against my jaw, trembling. I smell her elation. I sense her fear blossom into delicate hope. And it cuts into me, the realization that this is more than a simple kiss to her. This is true affection.
But she can’t feel that for me. Not me.
I jerk away, nearly tipping into the fountain in my urgency to get my hands off her.
She stares at me, her mouth open in shock. “Wow,” she breathes. Her fingers move to her lips. “That was . . .”
“Not smart,” I say, amazed at how calm I sound. My body is pissed that I’m so far away from her. My hands ache.
“Thunder,” she says.
“What?”
She shakes her head slowly. “Nothing.”
TWENTY-FIVE
SAGE
“I’m sorry,” Faelan says in a tight voice. “I never should’ve . . . that wasn’t right.” His body is tense enough to crack. He looks ready to bolt.
“I’m fine, Faelan,” I say, trying to reassure him. “Everything is fine.” But I can hardly believe what we did. Not just the kiss, which was—wow. My legs are officially useless and I’m ruined forever.
But I controlled it. I controlled the hunger. I took that thing in me that I felt this afternoon and forced it down deep until it was barely a buzz in my head. He was right: once I understood it better I could manipulate it. And I did.
And then he kissed me.
Oh wow, did he kiss me.
Not that he’s happy about it. He’s obviously not. I’d be offended by his reaction if I wasn’t so relieved that I’d pushed back this thing inside me.
“Thank you,” I say.
His brow goes up in surprise.
“For helping me.” I can’t keep a grin from surfacing. “I can’t believe I stopped it. I feel so much better.”
He watches me like he doesn’t believe me, and he’s waiting for the other shoe to drop.
But I just smile up at him. “I pictured it like hot coals in a box, and all I had to do was put the lid on top, and poof! It went out. Well, mostly, anyway. It was like the embers in my chest went from a burning ache to simmering.” I want to touch him again, but I’m worried he’ll pull away, so I just add, “I’m really grateful you let me try. I know how dangerous it is.”
“I shouldn’t have let that happen,” he says, pained.
Irritation begins to surface, and I’m about to ask him what’s so wrong with kissing me, and why he looks like he just ran over his neighbor’s dog when he should be happy his experiment worked, but a familiar voice breaks in.
“There you two are,” Aelia says. “Well done keeping her out of eyesight, Faelan.” She looks back and forth between us. “Did I interrupt something?”
“When does this thing start?” I ask.
She smirks at me, not missing my deflection. “Daddy’s just arrived. He’d like you both to meet him in the gallery upstairs. The girls and I will be in the crowd, and you’ll be presented on the second-floor stage, like a real princess.” She touches my arm reassuringly. She’s being nice? “Good luck,” she says with a wink. And then she turns on her heels and saunters away.
“We should go,” Faelan says, his tone heavy. “Are you ready?”
“No, but who cares. Let’s get this done.”
I follow him across the stone and moss pathway, along the line of amber-colored trees. Neither of us speak. It’s a relief not having to look at the panic on his face, since all I can see is the back of his head.
The evening air is full of the sound of hissing torches and gossip coming from the courtyard. It’s an unforgettable sight, the soft golden glow flickering over the beautiful people, their expensive clothes shimmering, their perfect features and figures making it seem like a movie set instead of real life.
The location looks like an ancient Roman temple, with tall white pillars holding up a crescent-shaped balcony. The most striking people are sitting up there, looking down as if they’re watching from Mount Olympus. My guess is that those are the “royalty,” the demis. Like me.
I would laugh at the idea of sitting with them if I didn’t feel like hiding in a janitor’s closet.
We go through a side door into the main building and then over to the elevator. As we step in and the doors slide closed, I can’t help flashing back to the last time we were in an elevator together, a couple of days ago. I was so clueless. It makes me wonder how clueless I am right now. How much more insane will my reality get after tonight?
At least I’m making progress, if only a little. I just have to get this part over with so I can learn how to fully control the madness in me. And then I can get out, knowing I’m not going to accidentally hurt anyone.
This world is never going to be mine. If that horror in the alley last night didn’t show me that, nothing will.
Faelan pushes the button for the second floor, then steps to the other side of the elevator, as far away from me as he can get. I want to tell him to calm down, that it was just a kiss. I consider a thousand things to say, but instead I just breathe and try not to look as nervous as I feel. Nervous about myself, about what just happened between him and me, about what we’re walking into.
“You’ll be fine,” he says quietly, surprising me.
The elevator dings, the doors open, and he’s stepping out before I can respond. I trail behind him, down a hall and into a wide ballroom. Marius is standing near a pair of French doors that appear to open to the balcony where the regal people are sitting.
Marius turns at the click-click of my heels on the wood floor. A smile of satisfaction curls his lips when he spots us. He holds out a hand, and I find myself taking it.
He’s in a well-fitted charcoal blazer and a black dress shirt, strikingly handsome. A beaded necklace is around his neck; it must be his torque, keeping his powers under control. The beads look like tiny seashells, and there’s a copper medallion with a milky blue stone at the center of a wave pattern. The design probably represents water—his element? It makes me want to look at my own medallion again, makes me wonder what keeps it from working right, especially now that Faelan seems just as baffled by the whole thing.
Marius holds my hand tightly, comforting. “My, my, don’t you look lovely, sweet girl,” he says, almost fatherly. He touches my shoulder and then releases me. “Look at our princess, Faelan. How will you survive this transition, boy?” He smiles.
Faelan clears his throat and gives Marius a stiff grin.
My gut clenches.
“Sir,” Faelan begins, his voice tense, “some feelings have changed and I need to be clear—”
I break in before Faelan can let his boss think that I might’ve fired him. “I need to ask you something, Marius,” I say, even though I don’t want to get Faelan in trouble. I just need to get my head straight. Too much is happening all at once. “It’s important.”
Faelan glances sideways at me.