Fighting Solitude (On The Ropes #3)

“You’ll never lose me,” she pledged, rocking into me while I collected myself enough to start moving again.

After another hard thrust, I found myself even more lost. I couldn’t get deep enough to experience any kind of pleasure. The anxiety and fear in my head numbed me physically, but I pounded away, desperately seeking comfort and reassurance within her small body.

And she freely gave herself to me as I fucked her harder than ever before. I bit her neck and painfully squeezed her breasts, trying to find anything that would make me feel again.

Her nails scored my back each time I slammed my hips against hers, and her fingers tugged at my hair as I raked my teeth over her neck and her shoulders.

She wasn’t exactly in pain, but she wasn’t far from it.

Yet she still gave it to me.

Her body was mine to do with as I pleased, and that notion made me take her even more savagely.

We were both going to have bruises when it was over, but I couldn’t stop, and before I knew it, my mouth had joined the fuck-fest.

“He killed you,” I blurted.

Her body turned rock solid beneath me. “What?” she cried as I sucked hard at the soft skin beneath her ear.

One at a time, I guided her long legs around my hips and drove in impossibly hard. “In my dream this morning…when I got sick,” I panted, drawing back slowly before slamming back in.

Her face contorted in a way that could never be mistaken for ecstasy. But her muscles pulsed around me when I stilled.

“Davenport.” Trailing my mouth up her neck, I whispered the words I never wanted to hear myself say, “He held a gun to your head and pulled the trigger.” My voice lodged in my throat, and my stomach knotted at the memory.

With one last powerful thrust, the fight left me in a rush and my body sagged on top of her.

It wasn’t in the wake of orgasm.

I was lost in defeat.

“Sit up, baby,” she cooed, pushing on my chest.

I sucked in and held it as I followed her order.

Moving onto my lap, she wasn’t happy until my cock was once again seated inside her.

I buried my face in her neck and hugged her tight as she started to move over me. Her desperation was far gentler than mine, and it made me realize how severely I had taken her delicate body.

“Christ, Rocky. I’m so fucking sorry.”

If she heard my apology at all, she didn’t acknowledge it. “No one will take me from you,” she vowed. “It’s you and me. Forever.” Slowly gliding up and down my shaft, she soothed my wounds by saying, “I’ll move in, Quarry. Whatever you want. I’ll do it. No argument.”

I choked on my breath as it rushed from my chest.

God, she had no idea how much I’d needed to hear that.

“Oh, God!” I clung to her even tighter. Taking over, I lifted her up before slamming her down my cock, giving her the only thing I had to offer at the moment.

Her moans grew louder, but she wasn’t getting closer to release—and neither was I.

“Quarry, stop,” she finally whispered, pushing me back against the couch.

“Damn it. I ruined that.” I pinched the bridge of my nose, not willing to look at her in the middle of my meltdown.

“Nothing is going to happen to me,” she pressed.

I laughed without humor. “Famous last words.” Sighing, I attempted to move her off my lap after having decided that it would be in the best interest of everyone involved if I just finished in the shower. Alone.

She wrapped her arms around me and refused to budge. “Don’t push me away. Talk to me.”

“What do you want me to say? I had a nightmare, and it fucking destroyed me. I’ll be okay.”

Her hand glided up the nape of my neck. “Okay, fine. I’ll talk. I think you’re about to go off the deep end. I said I’d move in. I said I’d do anything you want to make you feel comfortable, and I still feel like you just left me.”

“I’m right here, Liv.” I made my cock twitch inside her as further proof.

“You’re all over the place, Quarry. I know you. This is what you do right before you lose your mind. You can’t figure out how to make yourself feel better, and you’re going to disappear into your own head, where whatever answer you come up with is going to be wrong. And, if it’s anything like the one you came up with when we were kids, it’s going to ruin us.”

My whole body flinched at her honesty, but just as quickly, I felt relief. She knew me better than anyone in the world. There wasn’t even any point in lying.

“I love you so fucking much.”

Her arms convulsed around me.

“I can’t stop preparing myself to lose you. I’ve not even had you a full month and I’m already obsessing about failing you.”

“You can’t fail me.”

“I can. And I will. I always do. Eliza. Flint. You. Mia. The list just keeps on growing. And, last night, Davenport put his fucking hands on you because of me. I don’t know what to do with that.” I barked a manic laugh. “Clearly my subconscious does though.”

I was gearing up for another round of word vomit when she interrupted me.

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