Even the dark and distrustful parts that would eventually ruin us.
Threading my fingers through the top of his hair, I forced his attention back to my face.
“I’m more scared of you than I’ve ever been of the silence.”
His eyes narrowed, and I knew he couldn’t make out my words without his hearing aids.
But, just like the way he’d taken what he’d needed with his mouth between my legs, this was for me. He didn’t need to hear it. My confession alone was more than enough to release me.
“A part of me died the day you locked me in the closet.”
“Sign,” he urged on a gravelly demand.
I kept talking.
“You made me see that friendship is a farce and trusting anyone other than myself is the biggest mistake I could make. It was a lesson I had been learning my whole life up until that point. But you tattooed it on my soul in a way I could never forget.”
He crawled up the bed until he was hovered over me. “I don’t know what you’re saying. Sign.”
I didn’t. “You are, and always have been, the one person in my life who has the ability to destroy me. For years, I clung to you, knowing that, as long as I kept you close, I didn’t have to be scared of anything else. You, Quarry Page, are the embodiment of my greatest fear.” My vision swam.
He was notably confused, but his face softened. “Please sign,” he begged.
I couldn’t. “Getting into a relationship with you—giving you the few guarded pieces of my heart you didn’t already own is the scariest thing I can fathom. Losing you is frightening. Trusting you not to break me is petrifying.”
His eyes frantically searched my lips for the words I was refusing him. “Damn it, Rocky. What are you talking about? Sign.”
A tear escaped my eye, but a smile tipped up the sides of my mouth and the weight of the world lifted off my chest. “I don’t trust you. And I don’t know that I ever will. I do love you though. So I’m hoping that will be enough…for as long as we last.”
“For fuck’s sake,” he huffed, slapping his hand to the nightstand for the case of his hearing aids.
I tapped on his chest to grab his attention and then finally signed, “Make love to me.”
He squinted at me skeptically, his strong jaw clenching as he gritted his teeth. “What were you just saying?”
“Things every woman thinks in bed. I’m just lucky enough to be able to say them out loud.” I slid a hand between us and gripped his softening cock.
His breath caught as I began to stroke over his smooth length.
He clearly didn’t believe me, but that didn’t matter. For the first time in my entire life, I had admitted to him how I truly felt. I’d never even been brave enough to say the words out loud before.
Those words freed me from the solitude of my fears. I’d still get hurt—that was a given. Now, I could at least enjoy the exhilarating thrill of the rise before the fall.
Leaning up, I took his mouth in a kiss.
It wasn’t sensual.
It was a step forward.
And that’s what made it the most arousing of all.
With a low moan, Quarry gave in to my request and lowered himself over me.
I was forced to release him from my hand, but he was soon positioned between my thighs.
“I brought condoms this time,” he said, trailing the head of his dick through my folds.
Wrapping my arms around his shoulder, I held his gaze. “No. Just you.” I over pronounced to be sure he read my lips correctly.
A boyish grin hiked the side of his mouth even as his eyes became downright sinister. “Always.”
A sharp, euphoric cry flew from my mouth as he filled me. My chin tipped to the ceiling, and my entire body arched into his. His mouth latched on to my neck, nipping and sucking as he worked me with his cock—pushing me higher with every thrust. And, despite how hard I tried to fight it off, my orgasm won out.
As I fell apart around him, Quarry slowed and repeated solemn promises in my ear.
“Every. Single. Day.”
And, if the way my heart swelled was any indication, I think I might have even believed him for a second.
But only a second.
Quarry didn’t follow me over the edge. He worked my body for hours. By the time he whispered my name in release, there wasn’t a part of my body he hadn’t branded with his fingerprints.
He made love to me.
He fucked me.
He held me tenderly.
He pulled my hair and bit my shoulders.
He stared deep into my eyes while taking me gently.
He took me hard and rough from behind.
The champagne went untouched.
But we eventually fell asleep, naked and sated, drunk in a different way.
Some hours later, I awoke to Quarry once again guiding himself inside me.
I was sore and exhausted and emotionally spent.
But none of that stopped me from spreading my legs and relishing in everything I had ever wanted with him.
It was my month to pay our water bill, but we were at a hotel.
The shower ran all night.