“No.” Mr. Higgins slammed the door in my face.
I knocked tentatively. Katie’s dad opened the door again. “What?”
I held up the basket. “I made sandwiches. And brought a pasta salad. And I was hoping to share it with Katie.”
“You really like my daughter, don’t you?” he asked.
I coughed into my fist. “Yes, sir.”
“Do you have any beer in your cooler?”
I cleared my throat again. “No, sir.”
“Wine?”
“No, sir.”
“Alcohol of any kind?”
I opened my cooler and showed him the soda cans. “Just soft drinks, sir.”
He narrowed his eyes. “And you’ll treat my daughter with respect?”
“At all times, sir.”
He bellowed over his shoulder, “Katie!”
She appeared from the hallway and grinned at me. She waved and it was all fingers.
“Jake wants to take you on a picnic,” he said.
“Can I go?” She grabbed his arm and held on to it with two hands. She looked at him until he bent and kissed her forehead.
“You can go,” he said. “Be home by ten.” He stepped to the side so she could walk out from behind him.
“That’s it?” she asked. “That’s the worst you’re going to do?” She laughed. “I thought you’d make him beg.”
He snorted. “The boy already looks like he wants to shit himself, so I cut him some slack.”
“I wasn’t going to–” I stopped. “Never mind.”
“So, I can go?” Katie asked.
He nodded his head toward us. “Go.” He closed the door in our faces.
I took a deep breath for the first time in ten minutes. “Oh my God,” I said.
She patted my shoulder soothingly. “You did great.”
We walked down to the dock, where I helped her into the canoe. We rowed around the lake until we found a quiet spot, then we ate, and then we kissed until her lips were puffy and pink. When the sun went down, she laid down on my chest as I reclined in the bottom of the canoe. She snuggled under my chin and I stared up at the stars.
And we fell asleep like that.
I woke up to a light shining in my face as someone pulled Katie off my chest. My arm was asleep, and I couldn’t wiggle my fingers to grab her back.
“You’re an idiot,” Pop muttered to me as he climbed carefully into my canoe. I could see Mr. Higgins and Adam rowing Katie back to the shore in their boat.
“I really messed that up,” I said.
“Yep,” Pop grunted at me as he began to paddle us back toward land.
“They’ll never let me see her again.”
“Did you use condoms?” he asked as we tugged the boat onto the shore. He stared into my face.
“Pop,” I complained, “we didn’t–”
“They’ll let you see her again. In the daylight. Where you can’t do any snuggling.” He started to whistle as we walked to our house.
That was a damn shame, because cuddling with Katie…that was the highlight of my summer.
The next day, Katie was cleaning the bath house with a toothbrush, while I hammered nails into the dock. It was like we were on opposite ends of the earth, and I couldn’t even tell her I was sorry for getting her in trouble.
26
Katie
I’m in the middle of the best dream ever. A warm body is wrapped around mine, one arm beneath my head where I’m using it as a pillow and the other is wrapped around my middle. My dream lets me enjoy it, bask in it, and roll around in it until I get all tangled up in comfort and want. Until I blink my eyes open.
Immediately, fear floods my heart as I wake up and realize there’s really a warm body in bed with me. “Cole?” I mumble.
“No, I’m warm,” Jake mutters from behind me. “So are you.”
Jake’s hand roams across my hip and up my side. “Just a bad dream,” I say. I wiggle my bottom. I really have to pee. “Go back to sleep.”
“Mm,” he hums. He rocks his hips and presses against my bottom. Then he stiffens and pulls back. “Sorry,” he says with a tiny laugh. “Forgot where I was for a second.”
God, I have missed the feel of a man behind me in the early morning hours. During that time before kids wake up, before the house starts to stir, before anyone needs anything from me, Jeff and I used to enjoy the quiet, and enjoy each other. Sometimes it was rushed and sometimes it was slow, but it was always there. It was always mine. This, what I have with Jake, it’s not mine, and I know it very well. It’s stolen. It’s like contraband that I’m keeping and using for my own purposes. I try to squeeze out from under his arm, but Jake wraps me up tighter and pulls me back against him.
“Don’t go,” he mutters close to my ear. His lips press against my shoulder, and I arch my neck to give him better access.
“Jake,” I whisper.
“Katie,” he whispers back, and his chest rumbles with laughter against my back. “Just shut up for two seconds and let me hold you, okay?”
“Okay.” I settle back, despite the fact that my bladder is seriously complaining. I turn my head and press my lips to Jake’s upper arm, and he slides his palm up my side, beneath my shirt. I lay my hand over his and he chuckles.