Heart pounding out of my chest, I look up into Christopher’s angry face. “Ashley.”
As soon as my stomach leaps with joy, I promptly burst into tears.
His brow furrows but he pulls me close and wraps his arms tight around me. “Baby, what’s wrong? Tell me so I can fix it.”
It’s so like him. What makes him so wonderful. I need to step away but I can’t yet, because he makes me feel safe. Like I can do anything as long as he’s with me.
Which is crazy, but true.
He rubs my back in slow, soothing circles. “Ssshhhh. Tell me what’s wrong.”
I think I love him.
I don’t trust it, or me, because I’m so foolish when it comes to my feelings, but I know I’ve never felt anything like this before. All the years I wasted on Trevor are just that—a waste—nothing compared to Christopher.
I hiccup against his chest and burrow in closer. “M-my d-dad had a heart attack.”
Immediately he stiffens.
Tears fall down my cheeks as I steel myself. I didn’t want to tell him because I know how responsible he is, and I don’t want him to be obligated.
“Ash, Christ, I’m sorry.” He kisses the top of my head and then he goes directly into doctor mode. “Tell me everything you know about his condition. Where is he? Who’s the doctor? I’ll call Cam and we’ll find out if we can get him moved to make sure he has the best care.”
Cameron, Christopher’s oldest brother is a cardiologist, one of the best heart surgeons in the city.
I pull Christopher closer. “They live in Ohio. He’s okay. It was minor and they say he’s going to be all right if he does what he’s supposed to do, but my mom is scared. I need to go be with them. My plane is in four hours. I need to get packed so I can leave.”
He tilts my chin and forces me to look into his handsome face. “You scared me. I thought you’d left again.” He kisses me. “Let’s go. We’ll figure out what needs to be done, we’ll get him moved to Chicago and I promise between my father and brother he will get the best care money can buy.”
“Thank you.” I suck in a breath and blow it out. This is it. I don’t want it to come, but here it is. I need to let him off the hook. “You’re so sweet, but you need to stay and finish your conference. This isn’t your problem. He’ll be okay, my dad’s a fighter and he’ll make it. You don’t have to worry about me. Stay and have fun.”
He pulls back and grips my arms, shaking his head. “Ashley, you are my problem. I’m coming with you.”
“It’s okay. You don’t have to.” I bite my lip and look away. “I appreciate it. Really I do, but it’s not necessary.”
He drops his arms and takes a step back. “What exactly are you saying?”
I hug myself, already missing his warmth. “I’m saying you need to stay.”
“Is that what you want?”
I want to tell him the truth. I want to lay my feelings bare for him. But he’s not like Trevor this way. Trevor would take any excuse to run out on a bad situation, he’d back away as fast as he could from anything that even hinted at feelings. But Christopher isn’t like that. He’s caring. He’s responsible and ethical. If I tell him I want him to come with me, he’ll feel obligated. I don’t want that for him.
I look beyond his shoulder. “It doesn’t matter. Maybe this is the way things need to be. Maybe a couple of crazy days in paradise is all we get. It’s not like we have a future together.”
“And why don’t we have a future?” His voice is soft.
I shiver against it and shake my head a little. “I mean, come on, think about it. You’ve got a crazy schedule. You need to focus on your residency and then you’ll be starting your career. That’s what you need to focus on. I’m five years older than you are. You’re a doctor; you understand the reality of my situation. I don’t have a lot of time to waste anymore. It’s biology, and if I want to think about having kids, I need to think about these things.”
I steel myself. I mentioned the K word. A word bound to send any guy screaming in panic.
“That’s bullshit.” The words are hard hits to the chest and I jerk my attention to him. He points at me. “You’re terrified because you know this is real.”
“I—”
He cuts me off. “I’m going to ask you a simple question and you’re going to give me the truth, do you understand?”
Hope and fear flutter in my chest. “Okay.”
He grips my chin and holds my jaw so that I can’t look away. “Do you love me?”
The question shocks me. My pulse speeds up and I sputter. “T-that’s ridiculous. We hardly know each other.”
“Answer the question, Ashley. Do you love me?”
Panic speeds through my blood at two hundred miles per hour. “I did answer. We haven’t known each other a week. How could you even ask such an insane question?”