We stared at the ceiling in silence, the candlelight creating flickering shadows against the frescoed walls of the room. I remembered our days when we used to sleep on my pallet in my tiny cubicle near the kitchen. Now the room was large and sumptuous, a room I had once only dreamed of having.
“She wants you to convince Apicius to let her marry Casca.”
I wasn’t surprised. “Apicius has other suitors in mind. Consul Publius Cornelius Dolabella and Appius Marius Narses are at the top of his list.”
“They’re old enough to be her grandfather. Besides, Casca would be a good match. He has connections and his father is well liked in the Senate—he could sway any votes Apicius takes an interest in. It might be possible.”
While I was not pleased with the idea of championing Casca for Apicata, I did want the girl to be happy. It was rare when patrician marriages had love. I wanted her to feel that same fluttering sensation in her stomach when her love walked into a room. I wanted her to feel the comfort of strong arms around her, keeping her safe. I wanted her to know the feeling that I had every day with Passia. While I wasn’t sure how I could convince Apicius, at least there was a slim chance—thank the gods Apicata had the sense to love a man who had status.
“I will try but only under one condition.”
She ran her slender fingers along my jaw. “What’s that?”
“That she does not see Casca again until I have asked Apicius and we know the answer. I don’t care if they exchange notes but I do not want to see you in the middle. I will meet Casca to talk of this arrangement. Apicius is loath to discipline me, as you know. But he would not hesitate to strip your skin bare, despite my influence on him.”
Her index finger traced my lip. “Brilliant idea! I, however, would love to have you strip me bare.”
I chuckled. “You’re already bare, my love.”
“I could dress again and you could strip me . . .”
I grasped her shoulders and rolled her on top of me. “Let’s move on to the best part, why don’t we?”
She laughed and slid her hips over mine.
? ? ?
The next morning, after attending clients at the salutatio, I walked with Passia to Apicata’s chambers. The Roman summer was around the corner and although it was still spring, the cicadas had already begun their song. I was anxious at the thought of making such a bargain with Apicata, knowing it would be against her father’s wishes. But when her door slave opened the chamber up to us and I saw Apicata at her writing desk, I knew why I was there. Because our little bird was in love.
Apicata jumped up and ran to us when she saw us enter, flinging her arms around my neck, almost knocking me over. “You’ll help me, won’t you? Oh, Thrasius, I knew you would!” Her voice was loud in my ear. I pulled back and brushed her hair out of her eyes.
“There is something you need to promise me.”
She smiled. “What? Anything. I’ll do anything if I can be with Leonis!”
It was unsettling to hear her call him Leonis instead of Casca; the praenomen was used only with intimate family. Passia was right; Apicata was deeply smitten. I thought back to my own youth and when I first laid eyes on Passia. It was a feeling that swept me away too.
I pushed the thought out of my head. It would not do to have Apicata see me as soft. “You have to promise me you won’t see Casca until your father has made his decision. Send notes if you must but I will not have any of the slaves taking Apicius’s wrath for your follies. Am I clear?”
“What if Father says no?” Apicata asked in a sullen tone.
“He might. And if he does, you will have to live with that. Your father has jurisdiction over you until you are given to your husband.”
She turned on her heel and stormed across the room. “It’s not fair! Why don’t I get to have a say in the matter? It’s my life!”
Passia went over to where Apicata stood by the window and put her arm around the girl. “I know it’s hard to understand, but this is the way it has always been. And the way it will always be.”
Apicata pushed Passia away. Tears tracked their way across her cheek. “No, it’s not! You are with the man you love! Why can’t I be?”
I felt my heart break.
Passia would have none of it. “Apicata, our circumstances are different. You can hardly compare your life to my life as a slave. Tell me, would you trade places and wait hand and foot on me?”
Apicata didn’t answer. Passia carried on. “Besides, I am not married to the man I love. As long as I’m a slave I may never have that. I could be sold tomorrow for all I know. But you, you are the daughter of one of the wealthiest men in the land. You will always live a life of luxury. Any husband you have will be happy to dote on you. Even if your father doesn’t choose Casca for you, you will be well cared for.”
“I don’t care about luxury. I want Leonis.”
“Do not despair yet. Let us see what spells Thrasius can work on your father.”
Apicata brightened. “Will you try, Thrasius? Father never denies you anything.”
I considered Passia, thinking about how Apicius continued to deny me the only thing I truly wanted. “I will, but you must be patient. I will ask him on my own time, when I think it best.”
Apicata grinned. “I will be patient, but it will be hard.”
It would have to do. I would need to approach Apicius soon or the girl would never give me peace of mind. As the poets always say, absence makes the heart grow fonder. And young lovers more desperate.
“Tomorrow I’ll discuss this arrangement with Casca. Write me a note to give to him, so he knows I have true intentions.”
“Can I go with you?” She looked at me, her eyes full of hope. It took all my willpower, but I told her no. She opened her mouth to protest, but decided against it.
She told me the details about meeting Casca and promised to bring me the note in the morning. When I left, a flock of crows cawed in the distance. Maybe it was the sound of the gods whispering to me that nothing good would come of this. I shook the thought out of my mind.
? ? ?
Apicata had been meeting her lover in the public gardens down the street from our villa. There were many alcoves where young lovers could meet and not be disturbed. It was in one such alcove that I found Casca waiting for Apicata to arrive.
He was there at the appointed time. When the bushes rustled, he thought I was Apicata and called out her name in an eager voice.
“I’m afraid not,” I said as I stepped through the flowered archway into the space where he waited.
He stood up, alarmed, scrambled over the bench, and held up his fists. There was no exit in that direction but he appeared ready to push his way through the leaves.
“What do you want? Stay back!”
By Jove, he thought I wanted to beat him up! I chuckled to myself. I was not a fearsome figure by any means, and couldn’t he see I didn’t carry a weapon? Still, he had good reason to be afraid; meeting with a patrician’s daughter without permission was a highly punishable offense. I noted the hedge was made of hawthorn, and as such would be painful should he choose to flee.