Outside the window is the crescent of Hanalei Bay. People dot the resort’s beach like paint speckles on a white canvas. While he can’t see it, he knows toward the far end of the bay is Natalya’s house, tucked behind the palms. She’s there with his sons, waiting for him.
He wants to be with them more than anything, especially as the tension between his brothers and mother escalates. Their voices rise, each trying to talk over the other. He knows they must accept and move past how they’ve treated each other. But right now, his sons are his priority. He wants to build a life for them, here in Kauai. He also wants a chance to get to know the woman who remained at his side, even with the knowledge he’d one day forget her. They are his ohana.
But his heart is heavy, and he still isn’t sure he can return the love Natalya freely gives him. He wonders if he’s entitled to another chance with his sons after everything he’s put them through. He’s made too many mistakes over the years.
He grips the taut muscles in his shoulder and slides his other hand into his pocket. His fingertip snags on Aimee’s engagement ring. He holds the diamond solitaire to the light. The platinum band reflects a distorted view of the room behind him. As he watches Thomas argue with Phil and their mother, everything clears.
Had Aimee told him last week she wanted to file charges against Phil, he would have done everything in his power to make sure Phil received the justice he deserved. He’d still do it. Instead, Aimee forgave James for how he’d handled the situation. She’s moved on.
How can he do the same? He’s made too many decisions he regrets. Despising Phil during their youth when he should have loved him as a brother. Lying to Aimee for too many years. Not trusting Thomas to handle the situation with Phil. And following Phil to Mexico. That’s his biggest mistake. One that cost him everything, and one that he can never turn back from.
He isn’t sure he can accept these mistakes, which make him think of the letter from Carlos. The words run through his mind and in between the lines he finds the answer. While he does need to forgive those who have wronged him to move on, he needs to forgive himself above anything else.
“He practically bankrupted Donato and tried to murder James,” Thomas bellows at their mother. “You expect me to carry on as though nothing happened?”
“What’s done is done. We’ve lost too much of ourselves already,” Claire pleads.
“I saved James,” Phil defends.
“That’s bullshit!”
“He’s right.”
Three sets of eyes turn to James. Phil grins. Thomas’s jaw comes unhinged. “You remember.”
“I’ve been remembering bits and pieces for a while now. But, yes. I remember.” James fists the ring. “I’m alive today because Phil warned me to swim and when to jump. There was another guy on the boat. He’s the one that shot me.”
Disappointment twists Thomas’s face. He stares at the white shag carpet, hands on hips. “Are you absolutely sure it wasn’t Phil?” he asks after a long moment. “What about the back room at the bar? Did you hear or see anything?”
“I didn’t see a thing, and I didn’t hear anything about Fernando Ruiz or the Hidalgo cartel that would have helped your case, if that’s what you’re asking. They put a sack over my head and made me into their punching bag as they asked questions about the DEA’s investigation, of which I didn’t know much. I wasn’t of importance to them. That’s why they dumped me.”
Thomas’s shoulders sag and his face contorts into a masterpiece of regret. He’d never had to keep James hidden.
“Actually, I did witness something of importance.”
Thomas lifts his face, his expression expectant, eager almost.
James looks at Phil. “At the risk of his own life, my big brother saved mine. Why, Phil? Why didn’t you shoot me?”
Phil swipes a tongue across his lips. His eyes shift to their mother and back to James. “I couldn’t do it. You’re my brother.” He looks at both Thomas and James, then holds his mother’s gaze. “Ever since I learned you’re my mother, I just wanted to be your son.” Claire softly gasps and Phil turns to Thomas. “As for what I did to Donato Enterprises, I never meant for anyone to get killed. I only wanted you to feel the same loss I did when I didn’t inherit my father’s company. And James, I swear,” he says, looking back at him, “I’ll make it up to you someday. I’ll even apologize to Aimee.” He sets down his drink with a shaking hand, the first sign of vulnerability James has seen him exhibit since he discovered his parents in the woodshed.
Phil fists his hand and a mask falls back over his face. He extends his arms with a flourish and takes a dramatic bow. “That, ladies and gentlemen, is what I call relationship progress. Mom, your therapist will be proud.” He meets James’s gaze, his own sincere. “Thanks for remembering.”
James crosses the room and gives Thomas the billfold. Their gazes meet and a general understanding passes between them. Thomas’s secret is safe with him. Where James grew up wanting to be an artist, Thomas had wanted to be an agent. At least Thomas figured a way to do both, work for the DEA and oversee Donato Enterprises’ operations. He then sets Aimee’s engagement ring on the coffee table. Claire peers at it.
“Is that the ring you gave Aimee? She was never good enough for you.”
“No, Mother,” he says, heading toward the door. “I was never good enough for her. But I’m trying to make myself better.”
She twists around. “Where are you going?”
“Home, to my family. Oh, one more thing.” He snaps his fingers when he reaches the door, then points at Phil. “I apologize for how I treated you when we were kids. But if you so much as contact Aimee, go to her café, shop in the same fucking grocery store, or even breathe her name, I will serve your balls on a platter to local law enforcement.” He may still do that after he discusses it with Aimee.
James quietly shuts the door behind him, leaving the hotel and all the crazy that makes up the Donato family.
On the way back to Natalya’s, James stops at the shopping center in Princeville. He snaps a picture of the lease sign in the empty retail space’s window, then swings into the art store and purchases way too many supplies, including an extralarge canvas. He’ll order more online later. He’ll also research the school district and pick up registration packets.
It’s late afternoon when he arrives at Natalya’s house. He called ahead and they’re waiting for him in the driveway. Marc barrels into his arms before he’s fully out of the cab. James can’t hug Marc hard enough.
The cab driver pops the trunk, revealing James’s purchases.
“Whoa.” Marc slides down James.
“What’s all this?” Natalya asks as he unloads the canvas.
“I have a sunset to paint.”
Her gaze jumps to his. She tugs the end of her hair and her eyes well. “Really?”
“Really.” He pulls her against him and kisses her soundly, amazed at how much he missed her in such a short time, considering they’ve only known each other in person for such a short time.