“I’m Elena Mendoza. Soon-to-be Mendoza-Brant. I’ve decided to go with the fancy double last name.” She reminded me of Fernando’s mother, Ms. Mercado: long, black hair, dark brown eyes, Spanish accent, and even her rounded cheeks and the freckle set to the right of her nose were almost the same.
“I’m Thais.” I paused, looked at my hands in my lap, and glimpsed my wedding ring. “Thais Hunt. Just Hunt.”
“Nice to meet you, Thais Hunt.” Elena smiled. “Well, you have nothing to be afraid of here. I can’t even begin to imagine what you went through, and the people you came across traveling all the way from Lexington City. I have a hard time believing you made it this far. But you did. And here you are. And you’re safe. And I just want you to know that. You lost a lot of blood—barely had a heartbeat when we found you—but the bullet missed everything major. You’ll be sore for a while.”
“How did you know? That I came from Lexington?”
“That would be my doing,” Edgar said from the doorway.
He walked into the room on crutches, his left foot encased in a cast. He was as portly as he was when I last saw him just before Atticus and I escaped Lexington City, but he seemed healthier somehow, cleaner, and more cheerful. He hopped over to the bed. It was a surprise to see him again, but I was incapable of showing interest or emotion.
“I didn’t think you’d make it,” Edgar said. “But I’m glad you did. I was worried Hunt would take you west. You never would’ve made that trip by yourselves, that’s for sure.”
“But we’re safe now,” I said absently, refusing to exclude Atticus. “We don’t have to run anymore. We’re safe.”
Elena and Edgar shared a private glance I pretended not to see, not for their sakes, but for my own.
Elena smiled and reached out, placed her hand atop mine. “Yes, you’re both safe. This is your home. For as long as you want it to be.”
A surge of energy flooded me then; I raised my back from the elevated mattress and held onto Elena’s arm, hopeful and eager. I lost my breath in one sharp gasp, pressed my free hand to the center of my chest.
“He’s here? He’s alive? Atticus is alive?”
Elena and Edgar glanced at one another again, and this time I couldn’t help but acknowledge it for what it was. Or what it might’ve been. I waded through my mind, trying to understand what I was missing.
Then I tried to get up—if they wouldn’t tell me what I needed to know, I’d go find out for myself.
“Thais, sweetheart,” Elena said, and she pressed a hand to my chest, forcing me to stay put. She sighed, and all traces of her smiles from before left with her breath. “I’m not talking about the man you were with,” she said, and then she laid her palm on my belly. “I’m talking about your baby.”
“What?” I blinked.
Elena smiled again. She nodded. “Yes, your baby. You both will always have a home in Shreveport. I take it you didn’t know you were pregnant?”
Edgar smiled, too.
I sat stiffly on the bed with the smell of scrambled eggs and bacon wafting into my nose from the tray just inches away.
“That’s mostly why you need to eat,” Elena added. “Baby’s healthy—strong heartbeat—but if you don’t start eating solid foods now, it won’t be for much longer.”
“I…you’re telling me I’m pregnant?” I couldn’t believe it. I didn’t want to believe it. I vehemently refused to believe it.
I shoved the tray out of the way, and the wheeled table rolled away from the bed. “I need to find Atticus,” I said, getting up from the bed against Elena trying to stop me. “I’m not talking about anything else until Atticus is here with me.” Pain rolling through my body, I got to my feet, but the IV tube wasn’t long enough to allow me much room to walk, and I stopped when I felt the needle tugging underneath my skin.
“Thais,” Elena said, coming up beside me; she laid a hand on my shoulder. “I’m sorry, but—”
I swung around. “Don’t you say it,” I demanded, holding up my index finger. “You brought us both here, rescued us from that field—I was worse-off than he was, so I know he made it because I made it. I remember telling him we were in Shreveport. I remember seeing his face.” Didn’t I? The Sweet Lie began to taste bitter in my mouth.
“Thais,” Edgar said, “you were the only one they brought back from the field.”
I stopped cold. I looked at the tiled floor cool underneath my bare feet as the weight of Edgar’s words pushed down on me from all sides.
“I’m sorry,” Elena said, “but he’s right. You were the only one alive when we found you.”
I stood motionless in the same spot for a full minute.
“If something happens to me, promise me you’ll do whatever it takes to get somewhere safe—promise me that you’ll fight to live. Promise me that you’ll go on to live your life to the absolute fullest, that you’ll be strong.”
“I know it’s hard to accept, or even to understand,” Elena began, “but I’m here for you, and for your baby. I always will be.”
I felt Elena’s hands on my shoulders from behind; I wanted to push her away because I didn’t want to be touched, but she was too kind and I couldn’t bear to treat her that way.
“Hunt was a good man,” Edgar said. “He will be remembered, and honored. No one here knew him but you and I, but he will still be—”
“Yes,” I interrupted, “Atticus was a good man. I am alive because of him. And I will live because of him, because I made a promise.” I said these things more to myself.
I peeled the tape from my arm and removed the needle feeding me fluids, letting it fall to the floor. With two fingers pressed against the flow of blood, I limped toward the balcony and pushed open the glass door to a bright blue sky and a new day. A new life. A new purpose.
Shreveport City was not as I had imagined—it was better. The streets were not made of gold, the skyscrapers did not scale in a whimsical spiral high above the clouds like out of a fairytale, and there were no glittering gates insofar as I could see. It was realistic—it was real. It was safe. And to finally be here, it meant everything. And as I stepped up to the stone balcony railing and looked out at the Great City, at the river reflecting the sun, the thousands of people packing the streets, I only thought of Atticus and how I wasn’t supposed to be experiencing this moment without him.
Finally acknowledging the life growing inside of me, the life Atticus and I created, I placed my hand on my flat belly. “Your father was the bravest man I ever knew,” I whispered. “And one day, I’m going to tell you all about him.”
Edgar and Elena joined me on the balcony.
“Where is his body?” I asked without looking at either of them.
“I’m sorry,” Elena said, “but we left the bodies. We don’t bother with the dead anymore. When people die here, in the city, we give them a proper burial. But out there on The Road, people we don’t know, we leave them. I’m sorry.”
I nodded. I understood. Am I standing? I couldn’t believe I was still standing. I couldn’t feel my legs. Or my hands. The pain of losing Atticus was all I could feel.