Everlife (Everlife #3)

“What?” I blink innocently, not letting my smile break free. “Too soon to joke about?”

“Forever will be too soon.” He nips my lower lip with his teeth, then takes his time cleaning the muck from my skin.

I love having his hands on me.

When he finishes, I return the favor, lingering on his pecs and maybe kinda sorta the bulge between his legs. Not my fault. It’s a big bulge. Like, really big. What, am I just supposed to ignore it? Impossible.

“Okay, playtime is over.” He takes the leaves from my grip and pulls me under the flow of water. His chest presses against my back as he wraps his arms around my waist. He rests his chin on my shoulder.

The horse brand on his forearm is now as faded as mine. At least they haven’t vanished. We are still in this battle.

“I’m sorry, lass.”

I reach overhead to comb my fingers through his soaked hair. “You’ve got to stop apologizing…love.” I try out the endearment, and breath hitches in his throat. Bingo. Found his new nickname. “Myriad taught you to rely on your feelings for every thought, action and situation, but they taught you wrong. You feel guilty, so you apologize, even though you’ve been forgiven. And even though your apologies are nice, they are basically a slap in my face, as if you don’t believe I’m telling the truth about forgiving you.”

“I’m—” He goes quiet, and I chuckle. His clasp on me tightens. “How can you forgive me? I hurt you worse than I’ve ever hurt another, and yet everyone else still harbors a grudge. And rightfully so.”

“I just… I refuse to be an emotional bookkeeper, keeping a detailed account of the wrongs done to me. I choose forgiveness, even when and if I don’t actually feel forgiving. Because it’s not about what I feel. Like everything else, it’s about what I choose. Do my emotions control me, or do I control my emotions? I decide. And really, like you, like everyone else, I’ve made mistakes. I like to think I’ve been forgiven, so, what I want for myself, I offer freely to others. Besides, love isn’t about getting everything right. It’s about being there for each other when everything goes wrong.”

A moment passes in thoughtful silence, the stiffness leaving him. Then he kisses my ear, my jaw and the pulse hammering at the base of my neck.

He cups my breasts, then slides his hands lower…delving under my panties. “I’d say you are too good tae be true, but I’d rather spend my time enjoyin’ you.”

I mewl and purr as I writhe into his touch.

When my head begins to spin from the pleasure, I turn in his arms, facing him. My gaze snags on his plethora of tattoos. “I love these.”

“Together they create a map of Myriad, as you once guessed, but they also mark where I hid my greatest treasures.”

I already knew that, but his admission is like honey to my soul.

“Most of the items were stolen from me,” he grumbles, “but I realized they weren’t really treasures, after all. They never really mattered. I have you, and you are what matters most.”

Melting…

He nuzzles my cheek. “Maybe I need to have an X inked over my heart. X marks the spot, and X stands for the numeral ten.”

I laugh, delighted by him. “I never pegged you for a romantic. But I like it.”

He lifts his head to gift me with a brilliant smile. “Seems I’ve been buryin’ my treasure in the wrong places. But that’s about to change, yeah?”

A blush heats my cheeks. “You did not just say that.”

“Oh, aye, I did.” Grinning, he rubs against me.

I gasp with pleasure, and sink my hands into his hair. “We aren’t always promised a tomorrow. The only guarantee we have is right now, and I’m not wasting another second. I want you, Killian.” I want to show my husband the depths of my love for him, not just tell him.

I trust him with my future, so, I’m going to trust him with my body.

He cups my jaw, traces his thumbs over my cheeks. His pupils are blown, and his body is trembling as forcefully as mine. “Are you sure, lass?”

Very. “Kiss me.” I lift to my tiptoes.

He meets me halfway, his lips pressing into mine. At first the kiss is as sweet as the air around us, gentle and wet, so wet, as the water continues to rain. An exploratory indulgence as we relearn and savor each other…but it isn’t long before sweet isn’t enough. Our bodies are burning so hot the water droplets are steaming off our skin.

He is my first and last love, and he will be my first time. What could be more perfect?

His hands wander over different parts of me, driving my need higher. Until I’m aching, overcome—desperate.

Between panting breaths, I ask, “Can a spirit who has experienced Second-death impregnate another spirit who has experienced Second-death?”

As a human, I didn’t have to worry. Not because I wasn’t having sex, but because birth control is given to all menstruating females in the name of population control. To have a child, a couple must petition for the right.

“I highly doubt conception is possible here,” he says, and I agree. “But if it does matter, we’re good. I receive yearly shots in Myriad to stop my little swimmers. I’ve got three months tae go.” He rubs the tip of his nose against mine. “Shall we continue?”

I nod. “Please d—”

He dives down, claiming my mouth before I can finish my command, sweeping me up in a brutal storm of unquenchable desire. Will I ever get enough of him?

He devours my mouth, giving and taking, giving and taking, sweeping me up in a riotous storm. Right now, we are the only two people in existence. Time ceases to matter. There is only here and now.

Blood rushes through my veins, a newly awakened river without a dam in sight. My heart races, and my limbs tremble with passion rather than weakness. I tingle and ache and burn and tingle and ache and burn and oh, I can’t get enough of this boy.

We’re dead—again—but I’ve never felt more alive.

He picks me up as if I weigh nothing and gently places me on a dry rock. He removes my bra and panties before settling on top of me. Skin to heated skin. Hardness against softness. Consuming need to consuming need.

The kiss deepens as his hands travel over me, kneading me, caressing me, driving me utterly insane. My tremors return and intensify. My blood turns to fuel, stoking my need higher. And higher. New mewls leave me, followed by moans, groans and pleas.

And he’s just getting started.

Anywhere his hands travel, his mouth soon follows. He touches and tastes every inch of me, this husband of mine, and I’m lost, so lost, set adrift, and I have no desire to be found. He is my treasure, and in his arms, I have everything I’ve ever needed. Love, joy, peace and hope. The foundation I will forever stand upon. The things for which I fight the good fight.

“I want this tae be good for you, lass, okay? All right? So you must tell me if ever you want me tae stop. I will stop, no matter how far gone we are. No questions asked. There’ll be no pushing you for more, okay?”

I nod, because I’m past the point of speech. But that’s okay, too, because he lifts his head to peer at me with radiant adoration, and I’m certain every bit of it is reflected back to him through my eyes.

In that moment, I’m so glad I waited, so glad he is my first, but had there been a thousand before him, the memory of them would have been burned away in the fire of our love.

When he claims me as his own, there is pain, but it’s slight, and soon fades. I cling to him, my nails in his back, and lift my hips to encourage him. As he moves within me, kissing me, loving me, still giving and taking, I’m overwhelmed by the knowledge that we are one.

One heart. One mind. One body.