I think of the faults he just listed about himself and smile inwardly. I spent so long putting Cohen on a pedestal that I didn’t realize he had faults. However, at the same time, I wouldn’t let myself believe I was a good match for Cohen because all I could focus on were my shortcomings.
Neither one of us is perfect. We make mistakes all the time. But we’re changing. We’re growing. We’re learning to be better for each other. He’s not the same Cohen who held secrets from me and went overboard in efforts to protect me. I’m not the same Britta who trusts no one and avoids going into town for fear of townspeople’s ire.
I used to believe that a happy life with friends and family wasn’t fated for me. That Cohen wasn’t meant for me because he could have anyone else.
But I was wrong. I didn’t believe in myself enough. I didn’t see my worth.
Loving yourself, and believing you are good and capable, is a journey. One that I want to take with Cohen.
I close the distance between us and force his hand open so his fingers can wind into mine. “Thing is, Cohen, I love you too. I want you to come inside with me right now, and I don’t ever want you to leave. I care for Aodren. As a friend. He’s not the man I want. The man I love is sometimes jealous and sometimes a little overprotective. But we’re working on that. And I have to disagree about Aodren being the better man.”
I brazenly run my hand over his chest.
His eyes flash before softening. He grabs me to him. At the same time, he reaches back and opens my door. We stumble over the threshold, our boots clattering against the wood floor.
A laugh, and then his heartbeat kicks against mine. His nose runs along the column of my neck before he draws in a deep breath of me. “Is that so?” His voice takes a husky turn I feel down into my core.
This man. The way he spins my world.
“Yes.” I grin. “The best for me is you.”
He moves his head to align his lips above mine. They hover there, teasing me. “Then I expect we’ll be getting married in the next few weeks.”
Is that a proposal? I roll my eyes and at the same time chuckle.
“Seems about right to me.” I run my fingers into his beard, grazing his scar.
Cohen’s smile could rival the glory of the sun. I see it for all of two seconds before his lips are on mine and his kiss becomes my world.
Acknowledgments
First and foremost, my gratitude goes to you, my wonderful reader, for supporting my dream and allowing me to take you on this journey. I am ever grateful.
That being said, I could not have completed this novel without the guidance and help from my brilliant agent, Josh Adams. Thank you for being the calm voice when I’m an erratic storm of thoughts. Or the enthusiastic cheerleader when I’m the author equivalent of Eeyore. I couldn’t have found a better literary agent.
To my editor, Sarah Landis: thank you for trekking through the Ever Woods with me. You took on my crazy ideas and helped mold them into something special. You have expertly guided me through the woods. It’s been an honor to work with you and the amazing team at Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.
Special thanks go to the tenacious Erin DeWitt and the kind Lauren Cepero—thank you for entertaining my slew of emails and taking such good care of my cast of characters. To Alexandra Primiani, my tireless publicist, thank you for spreading the love of the Clash of Kingdoms books. Your enthusiasm means the world to me.
Caitlyn McFarland, plotting genius, you pulled me through the trenches of mapping out this novel. It was a hellacious month. But you never walked away. Thank you for pushing me on, devouring caramel apples with me, and helping me sift through the muck.
Rahul Kanakia, your wisdom and insight entertained me, brought new levels of understanding, and shaped me as a writer. You’re my favorite phone call and my romance-reading partner in crime.
Madalyn and C.J. Nuccitelli, I would’ve been lost without you. Your hunting knowledge and skill gave Britta life. I might never hunt a buck, but I’ll smile and pretend the one mounted on your wall is the coolest thing ever. I love you both.
Jessie Humphries, your wit and sass have kept me laughing and smiling along this publishing journey. I hope we’ll be in this together for a long time to come. BFFs, always. You can’t get rid of me.
My heartfelt gratitude to Kate Coursey for reading my work and writing alongside me. To Peggy Eddleman for starting this journey with me and sticking it out thus far. Like I said in the beginning, “If you’re game, I’m game.” Let’s see this journey through. To Elana Johnson, Kathryn Purdie, Emily King, Taffy Lovell, Nicole Giles, Charlie Holmberg, Veeda Bybee, Lindsay Leavitt Brown, Sarah Larson, Julie Olsen, and Brekke Felt—you women are invaluable to me. Thank you for writing with me at Write Night when really all we did was stuff our faces with candy. Your friendship is a gift. I love you all.
To my amazing debut sisters, Laura Shovan, Erin Schneider, Nicole Castroman, Evelyn Skye, Shannon Parker, Rosalyn Eves, Traci Chee, Tara Sim, Jessica Cluess, Randi Pink, and Tricia Levenseller—thank you for staying with me through the end of the debut year, for sharing your stories with me, for every email, every text, every uplifting gift. One of the greatest gifts of publishing is finding such wonderful friends.
To Laurie McLean and all the agents at Fuse Literary for your friendship, advice, and support.
To all the lovely bloggers, librarians, YouTubers, and book enthusiasts, you’ve given my book and so many others a voice. I send my biggest hug your way. Never stop what you’re doing.
To CJ Redwine for entertaining my emails and giving me some of the best writing advice I’ve ever received. Your tips helped me finish this book. I’m forever grateful.
To my dear friends—Tammy Merryweather, Shanelle and Erik Bayles, Alecia Bales, Emily Hammerstad, Ruby and Garth Fielding, Skipper and Evan Coates, and Tad and Tami Rabin—thank you for loving me and my kids. Despite my hermit-like ways, I’m grateful that you’ve not given up on our friendship.
And last, my most heartfelt gratitude and love go to Mom, Dad, my siblings, my husband, and my children. Thank you for believing in me, showing up to book signings, and talking about my books to all your friends. Thank you for allowing me to have late nights and lazy mornings to sleep off the writing binges. When I see your social media posts or hear you speak about me, you make me sound so much cooler than I really am. Thank you for that, and for proving over and over that family is what matters most.
Chapter
1
TO SURVIVE THESE WOODS, A MAN HAS TO BE strong as the trees, Papa had said. The memory is a whisper compared to the attention my cramping stomach demands.