Me.
Why did my heart suddenly go from 60 to 110?
“It’s too early to be smiling.”
I look over at Teagan, who has one eye open.
“I told Brooks that I was nervous, and he said this... Don’t be nervous, because I already like you,” I say, reading off the screen.
Teagan is now smiling. “Okay, maybe I can make an exception for smiling this morning. Oh, my gosh, Phoenix. That’s huge. And you are so incredibly lucky.”
“I know, but I’m freaking out. I have no idea what to wear!”
She gets out of bed. “Okay, calm down. I’m going to pee and then I’m going to pick out something for you to wear.”
“Okay,” I say, trying to take a deep, even breath.
While I’m waiting for her, I text Brooks back.
ME: I think I might really like you, too, but I’m pretty sure you already knew that.
BROOKS: Kinda. Your poker face sucks. But that’s okay, because it’s one of the MANY things I like about you.
ME: What if you don’t like me after today?
BROOKS: Trust me, it’s not possible.
Isn’t it, though?
That is my fear... that he will change his mind.
I already like Brooks a lot, and I’m scared that once he knows the real me, he won’t like me anymore.
Should I tell him who I really am?
I mean, I probably should. It’s only fair that he knows the truth. And that he knows that two guys in the secret service are going to be watching us from afar today. And if it makes him not want to date me, it’s better to know now, rather than later, right?
Or maybe not.
The bathroom door opens up and Teagan walks over to my closet. She looks inside for two seconds before pulling out a white sundress that I’ve never worn before.
“Wear this,” she says. “With your dark skin tone and your dark hair, you’ll look like a total knock out.”
“Thanks,” I say.
“And leave your hair down.”
I nod.
“And no lip gloss, because despite what most girls think, guys don’t like lip gloss. Besides, it’s really gross kissing with lip gloss on,” she says.
“You think he’ll kiss me?” I ask.
“Duh,” she says.
I sit down on the bed again, feeling a little nauseous.
First date and first kiss... all in one day?
“Oh, my gosh. You’ve never been kissed,” Teagan says.
“Nope,” I answer. “Definitely never.”
“That’s actually really sweet,” she says. “Everybody is nervous for their first kiss. Of course, most people are a bit younger than sixteen...”
“Hey!”
“I was fourteen. It was, like, the day before my fifteenth birthday,” she says. “Funny story, but Jason Thorton was actually my first kiss. He kissed me at the docks after curfew one night.”
“No way. You two dated?”
“Gosh, no way,” she says. “We just made out. A lot. We still do sometimes, but only when I’m bored.”
I shake my head at her.
“What? He’s a good kisser,” she says.
“Right,” I say.
“Anyway, my point was, first kisses may be scary, but they’re magical. Especially since you like Brooks so much. It will be perfect. Don’t stress about it, or even think about it until it happens. And trust me, once you kiss him, you’ll want to do it again.”
“Obviously, since you can’t keep your lips off Jason Thor Thorton.”
She rolls her eyes. “I knew I shouldn’t have told you that.”
“Too late, you can’t take it back,” I say, standing up. “I’m going to put this on.”
I walk into the bathroom to put on my dress. When I do, I look in the mirror at myself.
I do look good.
Girly.
Pretty.
Teagan was right.
She’s always right about this kind of stuff.
I step out of the bathroom to show her.
“You are so gorgeous,” she says.
“Thanks,” I say.
“If Brooks doesn’t fall head over heels in love with you when he sees you, then he’s an idiot.”
11am.
This boy.
I’m meeting Brooks at the front gate of the school, mostly to avoid anybody seeing us. I had Uncle Matty and Jake drive me there, and now they are currently parked off to the side. They are going to follow us around all day and make sure we don’t get shot by terrorists. What a perfect first date...
But seriously, I’m not going to let stupid terrorists ruin my first date. I’m just going to try and forget the fact that two people are going to be watching my every move, and I am going to try to enjoy the day.
I’m only standing there for a minute when a black sports car pulls up in front of me. The windows are so dark I can’t see inside, but I know it’s Brooks when the car stops in front of me. He opens the driver’s side door and gets out.
And.
I’m.
So.
Nervous.
“Hi,” I say to him.
Yes, I am lame.
“Hey,” he says, smiling at me.
He’s so much more gorgeous in person... so much better looking than I even remember.
“You look really beautiful,” he says.
“Thanks,” I say, looking down at my feet. Because I’m too scared to look him in the eyes right now.
“You ready to go?” he asks.
I nod, looking up again.