‘What are you talking about?’
‘More importantly, was Maya right-handed? Because … because …’
‘What on earth are you—?’
‘Just, please, I know this sounds crazy.’ Nikki rushed back into the classroom and returned with Tarampal’s registration form. ‘This is Jaggi’s handwriting. You could show this to the police and they could compare it to the note. The note was smudged too, wasn’t it? Those weren’t tears – his hand just brushed against the ink and—’
Kulwinder snatched the form from Nikki’s hands. She didn’t even look at it. Her anger made her chest heave up and down. ‘Who the hell are you to bring my daughter into this?’ she asked, her voice suddenly low and frightening.
‘I know that you’re afraid to investigate it but there might be something here,’ Nikki said. She pointed at the registration form. ‘Just consider it, please. I could go to the police with you. There’s evidence.’
‘What happened to Maya has nothing to do with you,’ Kulwinder said. ‘You have no right—’
‘I have every right if I think an innocent woman was killed and the culprit could be caught.’
‘You’re trying to change the subject to distract me,’ Kulwinder said. ‘I won’t have you using my classes or the women of this community to carry out your agenda – whatever it may be.’
‘I don’t have an—’ Nikki attempted to argue, but Kulwinder’s silencing palm had shot up again like a wall. She stared her down. ‘I want you to go back into that room and clear them out. These classes are suspended. You are fired.’
Chapter Twelve
Kulwinder marched home against the brisk winds, clutching the folder to her chest. Her rage was in danger of spilling out onto the streets. She wanted to scream and for a strange moment, she invited thoughts of running into Jaggi now. One fiery look would send him scuttling away.
She arrived home with wild hair and flushed cheeks. Sarab was in the living room as always, the television lights flickering through the windows. She marched in and commanded his attention with a wave of the folder. ‘Did you know about this?’
He looked up, the remote control poised as if to pause her. ‘Know about what?’
‘The English classes. The other day, you said the classes have become very popular. Did you know what was going on?’
He shrugged and looked down. A movie heroine raced across the screen, her faithful dupatta trailing behind her like a red banner. ‘There has been some talk, sure. The English classes are not what they seem.’
‘What are people saying exactly? What are the men saying?’
‘You know I don’t listen much to idle conversation. There were just a few comments that some wives were becoming more outspoken. They had an entirely new vocabulary to describe …’ He shrugged and watched the heroine, who was inexplicably wearing a completely different outfit now. Kulwinder took the remote from him and turned off the television.
‘Describe what?’ she demanded.
‘Their desires.’ His face flushed. ‘In the bedroom.’
‘Why didn’t you tell me this?’ she asked.
‘Kulwinder,’ he said calmly. Her heart missed a beat. It had been very long since he said her name. ‘When have I been able to tell you anything you don’t want to hear?’
She stared at him in disbelief. ‘Those women’s conversations aren’t just about their bedroom lives. They told Nikki about Maya. For all I know, they’ve been discussing it openly for weeks and putting our lives at risk.’ She hadn’t recognized half the women in that room – what versions of the story had they spun and how would she control it?
‘Do they know something?’ Sarab asked. The hope in his voice broke Kulwinder’s heart.
‘Nikki thinks she has some proof but it’s nothing, Sarab. We shouldn’t get our hopes up.’
As Kulwinder relayed Nikki’s discovery about Jaggi’s handwriting, she remembered the police telling her about the note and its contents. The constable had to brace her fall as she staggered onto a chair. What had the note said? Something about being sorry, something about being ashamed. ‘They’re not my daughter’s words,’ Kulwinder had managed to say. ‘My daughter was not concerned about izzat.’ When had Maya ever used Punjabi words when an English one would suffice? The writer of the note had been careless and hasty in this imitation of her daughter.
Sarab stared and stared. He looked at Kulwinder as if she had materialized suddenly out of thin air. ‘Jaggi’s left-handed.’
‘So what?’ Kulwinder asked. ‘It doesn’t mean—’
‘There’s something we can do.’
‘Will they accept it?’ Kulwinder asked. ‘Or will they just repeat what they’ve always said: that Maya was distressed, that it’s natural to look for somebody to blame? Then what if the police won’t help us and Jaggi finds out we’ve gone to them again?’ The first time Jaggi called in the middle of the night, there were no threats. He simply told her that he and his friends knew what time Sarab left work on his late shifts. ‘The important thing is to stay safe now,’ she reminded Sarab.
‘Is it?’ Sarab asked angrily. ‘Are we meant to live our whole lives in fear?’ He crossed the room and pulled open the living room curtains, exposing the view of Tarampal’s house across the road.
‘Please,’ Kulwinder said, turning her back on the window. ‘Close the curtains.’ Sarab did as she asked. They sat in the shadows, listening to the low hum of the house lights. ‘Sarab, if something happened to you—’ She couldn’t complete her sentence. She was aware of Sarab’s heaving breaths from across the room. ‘I lost Maya. I can’t lose you as well.’
Sarab’s lip trembled. Say it to me now, Kulwinder urged silently but he looked past her. She wondered if he had been lonely when she was away or relieved not to avoid speaking to her. She could see them drifting further apart, sleeping in separate rooms, politely waiting for each other to vacate the living room before settling in front of the television. Just the thought made her feel terribly lonely, as if it was already happening.
‘How about Nikki?’ Sarab asked.
Kulwinder narrowed her eyes. The last thing she wanted to do was talk about Nikki. ‘What about her?’ she asked impatiently.
‘Where does she live?’
‘Somewhere in West London.’
‘Tell her she needs to be careful.’
Kulwinder thought back to her heated confrontation with Nikki. Not once had she mentioned to Nikki that she might be in danger. Did Jaggi know about Nikki’s questions? And what if the Brothers found out that she was the ringleader of these classes? Kulwinder shook her head to dismiss the thought. Nikki lived outside Southall. There was no need to panic about her safety. ‘I don’t know where she might be now,’ Kulwinder said.
‘Go to the next class and—’