On another day, I sat on the couch, adding a clear topcoat of polish to my nails, when a loud groan of frustration came from down the hall. I laughed for several minutes, knowing the sound came from his bathroom, where he likely turned to the space where his toilet paper roll should hang and found, instead, a roll of duct tape.
The next day I was showering with my bar of soap, which I started using since I felt safe it couldn't be tampered with without leaving evidence. However, the soap would not lather no matter how hard I tried. Took me ten whole minutes to figure out Giles had coated the bar in a thick later of the clear nail polish I must have left out in the living room the night before. I wasn't so angry at this prank though. I could've fared far worse after my duct tape stunt.
It's bizarre to think that out of my two roommates, the one I inadvertently spend more time around is Giles. My defensiveness toward him from the early days has ebbed away from grappling to put him in his place, to finding a perverse pleasure in pissing him off as much as he enjoys pissing me off. I find that I am no longer merely tolerating his presence, but have accepted him as a permanent pain in my ass, one that I'd strangely miss if it suddenly disappeared.
I've just finished getting ready for my shift when Giles comes through the front door. I pretend not to be excited he's home, keeping my attention on the lunch I'm fixing myself.
I've got a special treat waiting for him. There's a box of donuts on the counter. Of course, I knew I could never just offer Giles one. He'd be too suspicious. Nor could I leave it simply lying around. Too inconspicuous and therefore obvious. Instead, I wrote a note on it, pretending to be one of the neighbors gifting the donuts to Ava, and set the box off toward a corner of the countertop, out of plain sight.
I'm still not sure he will fall for it, but knowing his proclivity to digging into other people's food, I thought it would be worth the shot. Besides, the thought of him taking a big bite out of a donut filled with mayonnaise is too great to pass up.
When I glance over my shoulder at him, there's a distracted look in his eyes as he stares past me like he barely sees me. Something's off. He seems lost in thought as he reaches into the fridge for a bottle of water.
"Are you okay?" I ask, turning to face him.
"Huh?" He looks at me as if just noticing that I'm standing here. He uncaps the bottle, taking a drink before answering. "I'm fine."
"You seem...I don't know, down." I worry that something's happened. He's usually so carefree and light, I don't think I've ever seen him frown.
"Just got back from seeing my aunt," he says, running a hand over his face.
"Ava's mom?"
He nods, taking another sip of water.
"Is she not doing well?" I don't mean to pry, but all I know is that she's sick and Ava's working extra jobs to pay for her care. I haven't talked to Ava enough to garner any more details than that.
"It's hard to see her like that, when she doesn't know who you are or where she is." At my look of confusion, Giles adds, "She's got Alzheimer's."
My mouth opens then shuts again. "Alzheimer's?"
I wonder how old Ava's mom is and, as though reading my thoughts, Giles says, "It's early onset with fast progression."
"Wow," I say, looking down at his feet. "That's awful. I can't imagine that."
I watch as his feet move toward me and my eyes shoot up to his face, thinking he's coming to me. But his eyes are fixed on something over my shoulder. I don't realize until he nudges me sideways that he's reaching for the box of donuts.
He picks up the forged note that reads, Thanks for your help, Ava. Enjoy these on us, tosses it onto the counter, and reaches for a donut before my hand can close around his arm.
"Giles, wait--"
"She'll get over it," he says of stealing Ava's food.
"No, but--"
It's too late. As though to silence my protest, he jams the donut into his mouth, then chews for a few seconds before his eyes narrow and his mouth twists in disgust. He runs to the trash and spits out the contents of his mouth, then snatches his water bottle from the counter to take a drink, only to spit the mouthful of water into the bin as well.
Then he rounds on me, where I still stand by the sink, my hand half covering my mouth as I try not to laugh.
"You'd mess with a man's food? You're soulless."
He stands there, draining the contents of the water bottle, all the while glaring at me.
"It wasn't your food. Maybe if you'd quit being a jerk and eating everyone's stuff that wouldn't have happened."
"You're going to regret this one," he says, wiping his mouth with his hand. "You'll pay for ruining donuts for me."
"I tried to warn you."
He tosses the water bottle away and I'm pleased to see that his playful expression has returned full force.
"We've entered a new stage of this war, Julia," he says in a low voice.
"Oh," I taunt, with a fake shiver, "I'm so scared."
He takes slow steps toward me without breaking eye contact. His gaze so intent, it offsets my regular breathing rhythm. My breath catches in my throat. I hold my ground, though, staring up at him as he stops just a foot away, his green eyes pouring intensity down on me, making me feel warm across every millimeter of my skin.
He wets his lips and says, "This won't be over until you're lying down in front of me..." He pauses and my chest rises on a small intake of breath, as I will myself not to blush. Eyes glinting, he adds, "You know...in surrender."
"Then this won't be over," I say, somehow still staring at his lips. "Ever."
We simply stand there for a few seconds. I'm hyperaware of the fact that we've never stood so close to each other. And even though I'm hoping my glare is as cool and intimidating as his, I can't control my slight lightheadedness from the heat rising through my body.
"What the hell are you two up to now?"
Ava's voice pulls me back to my senses. I take a backward step from Giles as she walks farther into the kitchen. Cheeks warm, and not looking at either of them, I take my lunch and head to the table.
It's like I've just sprinted up a set of stairs, my heart beating faster than usual. It's not until I take a bite of my sandwich that I look up in horror to see Ava putting one of the donuts in her mouth. I try to shout out for her to stop, but my food muffles the words.
Ava's face contorts and she turns to lean over the sink to spit up the donut. "What the fuck?" she yells, rushing to run tap water into her mouth.
Giles walks away from her, his low snickering audible enough.
"Oh my god," I say, after finally swallowing my food. "Didn't you get my text? I told you not to eat those donuts."
Ava spins around from the sink, her typically adorable face pinched in anger. "I'm sick of this goddamn prank war," she says, jabbing a finger from me to Giles, who sits on the couch. "First, I lather lube all over my fucking legs, and now I'm eating mayonnaise-filled donuts."
I cringe at her words, feeling guilty that she's been collateral damage twice.
The reason I figured out Giles put lube in all my lotions was that I warned Ava to use a different bottle than I had, but it turned out to have lube in it, too.