“Of course I couldn’t have known! You drove a wedge between us so she never talked to me about these things. You did that! And look what happened!”
Dr. Winter did not seem surprised either that my father tried to comfort my mother, or that my mother used his kindness to whack him in the head. That was when I knew she had been involved before, when we disappeared. I imagine she had learned a lot about our family when they were trying to find us. But it was the lack of surprise she had in this moment that made me think she could see our family.
Agent Strauss stepped in. “I think we need to hear what happened—from the beginning. Please … let’s get things to the lab and let’s hear the story, Cass. If you’re up to it.”
Dr. Winter smiled at me and nodded. The people from the forensic team left. Everyone sat back down, my father on the end of the bed, my mother back next to me. Dr. Winter sat in a chair with a small notepad flipped open and a pen in her hand. Agent Strauss was standing beside her.
“We should speak to Cass alone,” he said to my parents. They looked at each other, then at me. They didn’t move.
“No…” I said. “I need them here. Please…”
My breath was choppy from the attack of emotions and I tried hard to steady my voice. I could not tell my story without my mother with me to hear it.
Agent Strauss sighed. “For now,” he said. He glanced at Dr. Winter, who nodded in agreement.
I asked if I should start from the very first night and Agent Strauss said yes. I let out two long breaths, like long sighs, and I started to calm down. Then I went back to that night in our house. The night we disappeared.
“The night we left, Emma and I were fighting. Do you remember that?”
Mrs. Martin answered. “Yes. Over that necklace.”
I had never forgotten the first time I heard her say this in an interview. I remembered everything she said about it, about the necklace. And about that night.
“I loved that necklace, so Emma wore it every day because she knew it upset me to see it on her neck. That day, at school, we were walking home together and Emma was nervous about something. I could tell. She was distracted. We walked in silence the whole way. When we got home, she went to her room and closed her door. She didn’t come down for dinner, remember?”
Mrs. Martin shook her head and stared at me like she was losing her patience. It made me want to ramble on and on.
“I don’t know, Cass. I don’t remember about dinner,” she said.
“I tried to talk to her but she wouldn’t let me in her room. I pounded on the door until she opened it. She was afraid you would hear and she didn’t want to draw attention to what she was doing. I walked into her room and saw some clothes laid out on her bed. She had just taken a shower. So I asked her if she was going out, and where and why on a school night. I was trying to make her mad because she had been so weird all day. But she seemed different. Less interested somehow, like this was all beneath her. She started organizing her purse. She put on her clothes. Then she turned toward the bathroom door and just pushed me out of the way. ‘Come back here!’ I screamed at her.… Do you remember all of that?”
Dr. Winter answered. “I remember your mother telling us about that. How she heard you fighting and then she saw the car pull out of the driveway.”
My mother had this story down perfectly. And so did I.
“I knew she was leaving because she’d put her car keys in her purse. The necklace was on the bed next to the clothes and I snatched it up before she came back for it. I put it around my neck. ‘I have the necklace!’ I said. ‘You can’t have it back until you tell me where you’re going!’ She came storming out of the bath room, yelling at me to give it back. She tried to grab it off my neck and I pushed her away. Then she finally got her hand on it and she ripped it off me. It broke the chain. But she didn’t care. She put it on her neck and tied the chain like a rope, in a knot, so it would stay. She looked in the mirror and adjusted the angel. Then she just turned and went back into the bathroom.
“I was so furious! I went out to her car and got in the way back. She keeps blankets in there for when they go to the beach to drink and I hid under them. I thought, ‘I’m gonna go where she goes and get pictures of her doing things she’s not supposed to be doing and then I’m gonna get her in trouble.’ It’s all so stupid, isn’t it?”
Dr. Winter looked at me sympathetically. “No, Cass. You were fifteen. It sounds very normal.”
Mrs. Martin copied her. She was very good at taking cues when she didn’t want anyone to see what was in her mind. Or her heart.
“Yes, sweetheart.” Her words were nice but her tone was laced with frustration.
“I waited there for a long time before the driver’s-side door opened and closed and then we started to move. I remember feeling nervous about my plan to get her in trouble. The car stopped at the beach, in a spot in the very back of the lot. I heard Emma sigh really hard and long, like she was nervous, too. But then she got out of the car, left her purse, and the keys, and walked to the shore. I waited a few seconds and then got out, slowly and quietly. I followed her and I know she didn’t see me, because she kept going toward the water without looking back. When she got there, she took off her shoes and waded into the water. I stood behind the changing room, peeking out from the side. I could see her in the moonlight, and I thought maybe she was going to swim with all her clothes on. But she didn’t move. She just stood there looking at the water and splashing it with her toes.
“And then there were headlights coming from behind me. They shined onto her and she seemed startled but then she started walking toward the car, away from the water. I know she was startled because she forgot her shoes. She walked right past the changing rooms where I was hiding and watching. The lights went off. Then the engine. A door opened and a man got out. There was also a woman in the car but she stayed inside.
“Emma started to walk toward the car, toward this man, and I felt this horrible fear that she was leaving forever. I ran toward the car and screamed her name. ‘Emma!’ I started to see him more clearly. He was older. He had brown hair and a kind smile and he folded Emma into his arms in a big hug.