I nod.
“Well, come over then. Just be a normal kid for once. I’m having a party to celebrate and I consider you a good friend. You should be there. We’re graduating, Shannon. You worked your ass off this semester to make it happen. Let go for once and forget what that weird fuck has to say about it. I mean, really. Do you think he’s gonna stick around now that he’s finished with school? Come over and have fun with me. And I’m not making a move on you, OK? I’ve got my eye on someone and we’ve been fucking around for a few weeks. That’s not what I’m after.”
I sit and think for a few seconds. Maybe he’s right. I’m way too dependent on Mateo for things. So I look up at Danny and say, “OK.”
“Yeah?” He smiles.
“Sure. I need a good high-school party, to be honest.”
“Come by around nine then.” He stands up, smiling with his accomplishment of breaking down my walls. “Things will be just getting started by then.”
He walks off, saying hi to other kids as he makes his way across campus. I just sit there and watch him disappear, thinking about what an idiot I am.
Jason, for one. That’s probably all true. He’s been lying to me.
But so has Mateo, at least a little, even if it’s simply by not explaining. He never mentioned this history with Danny’s family. But no wonder he wanted me to stay away from Danny. He can’t be a narc, though. He’s way too busy for that kind of secret life.
He has a secret life with me though. And I have one with him. And Jason has one with Phil and the babysitter. So it appears that it’s not so hard to have a secret life.
I guess anything is possible. But I’m not throwing away anything with Mateo over his past with Danny’s family. I love him way too much to do that.
I wish I didn’t. Because Danny’s right about one thing. Mateo is leaving Anaheim in two days and I’m not.
Chapter Thirty-Two
When I get home Danny was right. There’s a note on the table in Jason’s scratchy handwriting saying that Olivia is staying at the sitter’s.
Why, though? Why tonight when he’s never done this before? It just bugs me. And the whole secret relationship with the babysitter. Why is it a secret?
I sit down on the couch, not used to the quiet and freedom to be here and not have Olivia’s demands be the first thing on my mind. I turn the TV on to make background noise, and still, I’m unsettled.
I don’t think Mateo is cheating or anything stupid like that. But I just got a lot of information I didn’t necessarily want. It’s no big deal if he decided to go to LA today. Or if he got back early and didn’t let me know. We don’t have one of those report-back-to-me relationships. We hardly ever talk when we don’t have plans. But we’ve had plans every day but Sunday for the past four months, so I never had to worry about where he was.
I get out my phone and press his contact button. It rings three times before he picks up, but the relief I feel washes over me like an ocean. “Hey,” he says. “What’s up? Have a good last day?”
“Yeah,” I lie. I’m just happy to hear him. “What are you doing?”
“Just work,” he says casually. “Cleaning out my office and turning things in.”
“So you’re still in LA?”
“Yup. I’m gonna stay here tonight. Got a hotel down the road.”
“Oh, that sucks. I miss you.”
“I miss you too,” he growls. “But I’ll make it up to you tomorrow. You have plans tonight?”
The first part of that response started out normal. But there’s something in the last part that sets me on edge. “Why would I have plans?” I ask. “I have Olivia.”
“You do,” he says, after a few moments of hesitation. “Yeah, good then. Just forgot.” There’s a bunch of voices and then it becomes muffled, like he’s covering the phone.
“Who’s that?” I ask.
“No one. I gotta go, OK? I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“OK—” And then the call drops. I just look at the phone. “What the fuck was that?” But then my phone buzzes with an incoming text.
Mateo: Sorry, got cut off. I’m really busy, but I’ll text you tonight when I finish up.
Shannon: You should come home tonight.
Mateo: Probably can’t, but we’ll talk later.
I don’t text back, and he doesn’t either. How did things get weird all of a sudden?
Maybe things have always been weird, Shannon? Maybe you just never noticed it before?
I sigh and throw my phone down on the cushion, bored out of my mind. For the first time this whole semester I have nothing to do and nowhere to be. No one is counting on me, and even though I resented the fact that I was taking care of Olivia all the time, now that she’s not here I just want her back. Bad.
I swallow my pride and call Jason, just to check and make sure everything is OK. He picks up on the first ring.
“Yeah,” he barks. I can hear Olivia crying in the background.