Ego Maniac

Judge Hixton turned his attention to the other side of his courtroom. “Why don’t you enlighten both of us, counselor?”


Garrison cleared his fat throat. How the hell could he talk with that collar buttoned so tight? Looked like he needed to move up from a twenty-three-inch neck to a twenty-four. “Your honor, we actually have an amended petition we’d like to submit, along with an affidavit from New York Laboratory.”

The judge motioned for the court officer to collect the documents. “Have these been served on opposing counsel?”

“No, your honor. The affidavit was just received late last night. We have a set for Mr. Jagger there, as well.”

The court officer distributed the documents to me, as well as Judge Hixton, and we both took a moment to read through them. I skipped the amended petition and paternity lab results and went right to the third-party affidavit. I only had to read the first half-page:



We, Alexa Thompson Jagger and Levi Archer Bodine, have read and understand the consequences, alternatives, rights, and responsibilities regarding this affidavit and being duly sworn upon oath depose and say:



I, Alexa Thompson Jagger, am the biological mother of Beckett Archer Jagger, as documented in New York Live Birth Certificate number NYC2839992.



I, Levi Archer Bodine, am the biological father of Beckett Archer Jagger, the child referred to in New York Laboratory case number 80499F.



Wherefore, paternity has been established by Levi Archer Bodine with a scientific certainty of at least 99.99%.



Therefore, together we wish for a correction of the birth certificate to identify Levi Bodine as the father. We also wish to pursue full parental rights, including shared custody and visitation.



Judge Hixton’s voice was sympathetic when he spoke. “Mr. Jagger, would you like a few days to respond to this motion?”

My heart was heavy with anger and sorrow. It felt like my entire world had just been ripped out from under me. I cleared my throat to fight back tears. “Please, your honor.”

Everything that came after that happened in a fog. Garrison asked for temporary visitation for Bodine, which the judge declined in order to allow me time to review the legitimacy of the testing presented. A date to reconvene was set for two weeks from Tuesday, and then the gavel slammed down.

I was still standing in place after Alexa and her attorney exited the courtroom.

Levi Archer Bodine. The man had the same middle name as our son. Alexa had picked the fucking middle name. I’d suggested we use one of our father’s names, but she’d insisted she loved the middle name Archer. She’d always dreamed of giving her little boy the middle name Archer.

Fucking liar.

But why was his name so goddamn familiar?

Levi Archer Bodine.

Levi Archer Bodine.

Levi Bodine.

I knew it from somewhere.

Eventually, the court officer came over and quietly told me I needed to leave so he could call the next case.

Stunned, I made my way through the courthouse. I passed a handful of people I knew and ignored them. I heard their voices, but couldn’t make out what they were saying. It wasn’t until I walked outside into the fresh, crisp air that my fog lifted. Which was perfect timing to watch Alexa get into a bright yellow Dodge Charger with the number nine painted on the side.





Drew



“Your client should be more worried about losing her medical license than a timeshare in the Virgin Islands. Her patient videotaped her bent over the examining table as he gave her a rectal exam with his dick, Alan. When we’re dividing up assets, consider that video one of mine. My client spent twenty grand buying that video, but I’d say the value is a hundred times that in this room.”

I was sitting in my conference room negotiating a settlement with opposing attorney Alan Avery. We’d done enough cases together for him to know I wasn’t bluffing. Roman had found out a sex tape existed even before the good Dr. Appleton knew about it. And now Mr. Appleton wanted alimony and all of the marital assets.

But Alan’s focus wasn’t on the possible repercussions of that tape. His mind seemed somewhere else entirely. And when I turned to look over my shoulder to see what he was watching, I was pissed about more than just him wasting my time.

“She your new secretary?” he asked.

Emerie stood at the end of the hall, signing for a package from UPS. Her ass looked phenomenal in a tan, form-fitting skirt.

“No. She’s a sub-tenant for a while,” I said curtly.

“Married?”

“Can we get back to the settlement?” I slammed my file shut. “My client isn’t giving Dr. DickUpTheAss one damn cent.”

“That’s ridiculous. Her husband has been mooching off her for years. She paid for all of the joint assets they have with proceeds from her medical practice.”

“Yeah, well, tell her we said thank you for the parting gifts. She can earn some more. I’m sure she’s a very popular proctologist.”

“She’s an ENT.”