“Okay.” I sigh and nod. “You’re right, but I need a minute to gather my thoughts.”
“That’s perfectly fine.” He kisses my hand and is quiet as he leads me the few blocks to my car. I’m so fucked up in the head right now. I’m so disappointed in my dad.
And I guess that’s a good place to start.
I stop us when we reach my car and face Declan. “I found my dad’s old ledgers tonight,” I begin. “I found them in a drawer I’d never bothered to look in before. I’m not sure why.” I frown at that, but shrug it off.
“He didn’t keep records on a computer?” he asks.
“No, he had hand-written ones. His records are complete, showing exactly what he ordered and when, how much he made, how much he paid his employees, everything.”
“Okay.”
“And I found out exactly how much whiskey he was drinking.” I shake my head. “My dad died of acute ethanol toxicity.”
“He killed his liver,” Declan replies with a sigh.
“He destroyed his liver. Dec, he was drinking a case a month.” I shake my head again, still not believing what I saw. “And it wasn’t the cheap stuff. No, my dad loved the Chivas Regal.”
“Jesus, he was drinking a case a month?” Declan asks, as shocked as I was.
“Every month, from the time my mom died until the week he died,” I confirm. “I did the math, Dec. He basically financed over one hundred and forty thousand dollars to kill himself. And when I saw it all, his handwriting, seeing how as the years passed the writing is more wobbly and unstable, I don’t know, I was just twelve years old all over again, and I could hear him, smell him, and I’m so fucking mad at him!
“But he’s dead. I can’t yell at him, or tell him how he made me feel for all of those years. I can’t tell him, Declan. I don’t know if I would even if I could, and even that pisses me off.”
“Hey,” Declan says and pulls me in against him, letting me cry the tears I didn’t even know had been falling down my cheeks against his chest. “You don’t have to do this alone, Callie. That’s what I’m here for.”
“I just didn’t know what to say because it messes me up, and that surprised me. I thought I was better. I was gone for so long that I didn’t have to be reminded like this, and it just surprised me.”
“I know. And it’s okay. Come on, let’s go home.”
“I want to go home with you,” I say, almost desperately. “I don’t want to sleep alone tonight.”
“Neither do I.”
Chapter Twenty
Declan
I’m never awake this early, but I’m drawn to her. We don’t cuddle through the night because we get too hot, but in the early morning, with the chill from the air conditioning, I want her in my arms.
Who am I kidding? I want to be fucking inside her.
She’s on her back, snoring like crazy, which only makes me grin. I sleep better when she’s snoring next to me.
I am just better because of her.
I drag my fingertips down her cheek, her neck, between her perfect, firm breasts and down to her belly, where I circle one fingertip around her navel, and the piercing there. She stops snoring, clears her throat, and breathes silently, but doesn’t open her eyes.
She’s not fooling me.
I take my hands off of her and move to roll away, but she reaches out for me.
“Don’t stop now, sexy man.”
“I figured you’d want to sleep,” I reply, teasing her. I roll back to her and lean in to pull her earlobe between my teeth, my cock twitching when she gasps and then moans softly.
“I like sleepy sex,” she replies sweetly. God, I love all of the facets of her. She’s so damn sweet, but can be fierce and tough as fucking nails. Life is never going to be boring with her.
I can’t wait.
“Mmm, me too,” I reply and slide my hand down her side to her hip and grin against her neck when she opens her legs, silently asking for my fingers to slide into her and drive her crazy.