I absorb those words through my skin, through my bones and to my heart. I get that. Kai and I laughed in Berlin over her being the most powerful person in my universe, but it’s true.
“And as amazing as I think Kai is, she’s not perfect. She’ll mess up. We all do. Love her through her mistakes. That’ll be the true test of it.” She raises her brows over her mug. “Think you can do that?”
“I can do that.” I nod, certainty settling over all my doubts because Kai loved me through my mistakes. I’d do that for her.
“Then you won’t need my blessing.” Aunt Ruthie breathes a short laugh. “And if Kai’s as in love with you as you are with her, she won’t need it either. That girl is as stubborn as they come. In a lot of ways, Kai’s more like her father than her mother.”
Aunt Ruthie tips her head, brows up.
“Not that you could ever tell her that.”
“What was he like? Her dad, I mean?”
Aunt Ruthie’s long sigh makes the air heavy. She sets her coffee mug down, studying the dark liquid before answering.
“He was a good man who made a really bad decision and ruined everything.” Aunt Ruthie runs a hand over her salt and sanded hair. “I can see that in people. How good people do really stupid things. We all do, but what he did, how he left them, was unforgiveable.”
I don’t want to be another man in Kai’s life who hurts her with my bad decisions. Unfortunately, I already have.
“Did she tell you what I did?” I ask tentatively. “Why she left me?”
“No.” Aunt Ruthie grins. “But you’re a man, so I’m sure it was very stupid.”
I can’t help but grin back because in hindsight, getting Total Package to pass on Kai was very stupid.
“You’re right. I was a Grade A imbecile, but I was only trying to do what’s best for her, to help. She’s not an easy girl to help, ya know?”
“Oh, I’m aware.”
“And I want to protect her, to take care of her without smothering her, but I keep fuck—” My eyes dart to Aunt Ruthie’s waiting expression. “I mean, I keep messing up.”
Fucking and cursing—two of the things I’m really good at—are off limits in this house. The little smile she tries to suppress offers me some relief and emboldens me to go on.
“I’m in therapy, and I hope that’ll help.” I circle the rim of the mug with my index finger. “I’ve just never felt like this about anyone, about anything really, before. I’m not always sure how to handle it.”
“Can I give you a little cheat sheet?” Aunt Ruthie waits for my nod before going on. “Don’t just act out of what you think is best for her. You’re not her parent. You’re not her father. Think about what will show her that you love her and understand her. That’s important to Kai.”
It’s a simple thing, but it forces Kai’s words during our infamous fight back into my head.
“Do you have any idea how opposite of love that is?”
I can’t say a light bulb clicks over my head. I don’t know if it’s a eureka, but I think that insight could be a light for my path, illuminating how I should go forward, one step at a time. I want to pay Aunt Ruthie ten years of counseling fees for it.
Who needs Dr. Ramirez?
BY THE TIME I WAKE UP, shower, and make my way to the kitchen, the counters are loaded with raw chicken, fresh ears of corn, sweet potatoes, flour, and all the things that will make this day incredibly fattening and lots of fun. My boyfriend, the rock star, is peeling potatoes . . . and not very well. I better take that knife from him before he never plays piano again.
“Let me get that, baby.” I reach for the knife, but he holds on.
“I got it.” He leans up for a quick kiss before returning to the pitiful pile of stumps that used to be potatoes.
Aunt Ruthie levels a wide-eyed stare over his head, begging me to get him out of her kitchen.
“Um, Rhyson, maybe we should go check on things downstairs at Glory Bee,” I say. “See if we can find a way to stay out of sight, but still help down there.”
The awkward silence following my statement swells in the small kitchen.
“What?” My eyes flick from Rhyson to Aunt Ruthie. “Something wrong at the diner?”
“Well, we’re taking the week off.” Aunt Ruthie wipes her hands on the apron I gave her one Christmas.
“The week off?” My jaw drops. “Glory Bee has never been closed for a week.”
“Exactly.” Rhyson frowns at a particularly stubborn section of peel. “Aunt Ruthie’s past due for a vacation.”
“And if we close the diner while you’re here, easier to keep your visit off the radar.” Aunt Ruthie goes to the sink to rinse a few chicken thighs.
“Can you afford that, Aunt Ruthie?” I can’t keep the concern out of my voice. If my presence here costs her something, I may need to find somewhere else to recuperate. I don’t miss the quick look Rhyson and Aunt Ruthie exchange. A conspiracy if I ever saw one.
“Or maybe I should ask Rhys if he can afford it?” Hand on hip, I tilt my head and give him a meaningful look. Letting him know the jig’s up. “What did you do, Rhys?”
He sets the knife and potato aside, standing up to wrap his arms at the elbows around my hips.