Over my dead curvy unwed body.
“Sorry,” I said. “I’m not looking to meet, or not meet, your mother right now. Just got out of a bad relationship.”
“Heard about that,” he reported matter-of-factly.
“Yeah.” Ugh. “Awesome.”
“Did you really climb an eight-foot-high fence in heels and a wedding dress?”
“It was closer to six.”
The man puffed out his lips. “Still … impressive.”
“Thanks.”
The Beatles changed into the Arctic Monkeys and the scents coming from the kitchen were making my mouth water. Garlic, beef, food in general, all good things. Despite the music, I was reasonably certain everyone in a two-block radius heard my stomach rumble.
“Joe will be with you all night, ask him anything you need,” said Nell, wrapping up her brief tutorial.
“Right. Thanks.”
The two shared a smile.
“Remember what I told you about Lydia.” Vaughan gave his sister a serious look. “Don’t get her wet or feed her after midnight. She turns into this weird growly psycho animal. It’s not good.”
“I’m not a Gremlin,” I said.
“Wait.” With great drama, Vaughan smacked himself in the forehead. “My bad. It was tequila that did that. You can get her wet and feed her as much as you like, Nell. Just keep her away from tequila.”
I subtly scratched my cheek with my middle finger.
The jerk grinned while Joe snickered. Honestly, Nell was right. The sooner all men were sent to colonize the moon, the better for everyone.
“Anyone actually working here tonight?” A short dark-skinned woman dressed in a black Dive Bar T-shirt stood farther down the bar, tapping her talons on the stonework. She and Vaughan nodded to one another with familiarity.
“Any sign of Stella?” Nell asked her.
“No,” the woman answered. “My fellow waitress is still M.I.A.”
“That girl’s about to be out on her ass. I don’t care how great Eric thinks she is with the customers. Oh, Rosie, this is Lydia,” said Nell. “Lydia, this is Rosie, one of our waitresses. She’s been with us from the start. She was also in the same year at school as Vaughan. Say hi.”
“Hi.”
“Delaney’s runaway bride?” Rosie’s eyes lit up with interest. “I’ve been hearing about you all day. Is it true you climbed a ten-foot-high fence topped with barbwire?”
“She said it was closer to six,” answered Joe in his gravelly voice. “Didn’t hear anything about barbwire.”
The shine in the waitress’s eyes dimmed a little. “Still. Not bad for a woman in a wedding dress. Mine was so tight I couldn’t even get out of the limo without help. Did you know the groom and his best man took off to Hawaii?”
“No way,” said Nell.
My stomach sunk. “They went on the honeymoon?”
It made sense. Otherwise, the tickets would have gone to waste. Well, Chris’s tickets, at least. They would have had to buy new ones for the best man. Mine were nontransferable and I highly doubted travel insurance covered cancellation of wedding due to a scandalous sex tape. And yet, Chris and Paul were right now enjoying my romantic beach honeymoon. The effort I’d put into finding the right resort for us, the best room to start our wedding life off together perfectly. Wonder what they’d think of the massages and candle-lit dinners I’d booked. Suddenly my face felt swollen, my eyes hard and sore. No more crying.
It didn’t matter. It didn’t.
“I heard they’d gone too,” said a woman at a nearby table.
Too many people. There were too many people all up in my business. It gave me hives. Suddenly, all of the big windows, polished stone, and glossy worn-old-wood loveliness of the bar felt more like a trap. A stage with bright lights. My shoulders inched up, hiding me from view. Such a shit storm of titillation. I’d never given it much thought before, what it’d be like to be one of those people on the pages of magazines. Trailed around by paparazzi, having your life spread across the pages and dissected at every turn. And this was just a scandal in a small(ish) town. My aversion to attention, especially over something as embarrassing as this, made the Delaneys’s need to buy my silence all the more ridiculous. Those people didn’t know me at all.
I wanted my privacy back. To be just one more face in the crowd, doing my thing, living my life. Coeur d’Alene and I were done. Through. Kaput.
Amid the madness came a voice. “Hey.”
Vaughan’s eyes caught me, calming me. Gossip was not the end of my world. A few more days and I’d be out of here. The thought of leaving Vaughan bit, though he’d soon be on his way too. Back to the West Coast and the music biz. I’d make other friends. One day, I might even meet a man I could trust, someone I could make plans with.
“You okay?”
“Sure,” I lied. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
He leaned over the bar, getting closer, making a safe space just for me and him. “Asshole stole your honeymoon.”
“Meh. Bet he catches crabs.”