“I have,” he said, his voice thick.
The air suddenly felt heavier, like it was harder to breathe it in, and it didn’t matter anymore that he was an asshole or that he was giving me advice about Weston because he’d imagined us too.
“What do we say to each other?” I asked tentatively, afraid to break the honesty.
“We say a lot of things.” He placed a hand on my opposite calf and stood up, his fingers trailing up my legs as he rose. “Sometimes we say nothing at all.”
He was standing in front of me now. My legs nudged open wider, instinctively. Automatically he moved closer, filling the gap and pressing right up against the table.
I hated how much I wanted him to kiss me.
“Why do you do this to me?” I whispered.
His lips hovered above mine. Dancing. Teasing. “Do what?”
“Trap me like this.”
“It makes me feel like I have you.”
I ached at my core. “I don’t want you to feel like you have me.”
“Are you sure of that?”
I wasn’t, and the joke was we both knew it. Every reason I had for staying away from him was valid, but if he kissed me now, I wouldn’t be able to stop. If he kissed me now...
I tilted my chin up.
“Whoops! Sorry to interrupt.” One of my team leaders stood at the door, his hands covering his eyes.
Fuck.
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
There wasn’t a rule about dating across departments, but this wasn’t the reputation I wanted.
I pushed Donovan away and jumped down. “It’s fine, Tom. What’s up?”
Tom lowered his hand, seemingly relieved that he wasn’t in trouble for what he’d walked in on. “They have a campaign. Meeting in the conference room now to see the presentation.”
“Excellent. I’m right behind you.” I waited until Tom was gone before turning back to slip on my shoes. “I have to go,” I said to Donovan, unable to look him in the eye.
“Right. I’ll see you around.”
“Yeah.” I nodded and hurried to the conference room with my insides twisted up in knots, pretending it didn’t mean anything that Donovan had sounded as confused as I felt.
Sixteen
“This is the first emergency Friday morning meeting I’ve called at the executive level, that I can recall,” Nate said, looking to Weston for confirmation, “but I’m happy to say it’s for a celebratory cause. We have landed the Phoenix account!”
Cheers erupted throughout the conference room. Roxie had already told me the minute I’d walked in the office, but my team and all of Nate’s team had yet to hear the news. Whoops and hollers and hugs were shared, even a few tears.
Nate waited for the room to settle before continuing with his speech. “Word came in late last night. You all put in your best work. I’m very proud of what you brought to the table. Party on us tonight at Red Farm. Upper West Side location.”
I zoned out as Nate went through the details of the project timelines. Accidentally, I caught Donovan’s eye across the table. I’d been avoiding him since Tuesday, or he’d been avoiding me. I wasn’t quite sure, but every time we came in contact with each other, we both immediately ducked away in the opposite direction.
Now, I lowered my eyes quickly. My gaze landed on Weston who was typing furiously on his cell next to me.
It’s going to seem weird if my fiancée isn’t at the celebration, don’t you think?
He held his screen so it was visible when Elizabeth’s reply came through.
At this short notice, I don’t give a fuck. I’m not at your beck and call.
With an audible huff, he stuffed his phone in his suit pocket and sat back in his chair.
Trouble in fake paradise, it seemed. Not that Weston’s pairing with Elizabeth had ever been paradise. I sort of felt sorry for him. Though, really, what did he expect when he let Donovan arrange a marriage for him?
I’d been back to wondering about that over the past few days. Why had Donovan suggest they marry after finding out that I’d be coming to work at Reach? And why did he continue to push me into a relationship with Weston while, at the same time, he acted like he was attracted to me? Was that all in my head?
On top of everything else, there was a very real chance there was now a rumor about Donovan and me after having been caught in such an intimate situation. Thoughts of the potential gossip made me groan inwardly. Here I was, finally making strides with my career. I wasn’t ready to have it tainted by talk that I’d slept my way to my position.
Not to mention what Weston would say if he found out. If I were going to start a relationship with someone else in the office, then fine, but I needed to be the one to tell Weston. Especially if the relationship were with Donovan.
Which it wasn’t because there was no relationship. There was no relationship, nothing had happened, and I’d been tormented about it ever since. I couldn’t stop thinking about him. Couldn’t stop thinking about what had almost happened, what I’d wanted to happen, what he had wanted to happen.
What was he trying to do to me?
I dared another glance in his direction. He was staring right at me this time. He didn’t even pretend to look away when I caught him, and then, somehow, I couldn’t look away either.
Whatever he was trying to do to me, I was afraid it might already be done.
When the meeting ended, I gathered my things in a hurry, intending to make a quick escape to my office.
“Sabrina,” Weston called, detaining me.
So much for my getaway plan.
“Yeah?” I tugged on my hair, noting that Donovan had lingered to talk to someone as well.
Oblivious to my distraction, Weston smiled proudly. “I wanted to let you know that Phoenix was particularly impressed with our marketing objectives. It was one of the main reasons we landed the account.”
“I inherited a very qualified and talented team.” Just get through this. Just get through.
“You did. I know you did.” He shifted his weight to his hip. “Tom Burns also let me know a few things.”
My attention immediately tuned in on the name Weston had mentioned. Tom Burns had been the guy who’d seen me almost kiss Donovan. “Like what?”
Weston started to say something but then glanced around the room and seemed to realize we weren’t alone. “We should talk about it privately. Meet you upstairs in my office in fifteen?”
“Sure.” My heart was beating so hard I was surprised it wasn’t boring a hole through my chest. “I’ll be there in fifteen.”
As soon as Weston left the conference room, I dropped my notebooks and my phone on the table and placed my palms down on the wood to brace myself. I took a deep breath. Then another.
Then another.
This wasn’t even really that big of a deal because there wasn’t anything going on with Donovan. The problem was in all the details—would I tell Weston the rest? That I’d slept with Donovan in college? That I’d been fixated on him then?