“Spit it the fuck out, Jefferson. I don't have all day.” I ordered. “Okay…” He stalled but then picked up right where he left off. Waves of anxiety rolled off of him and into me, hitting me with enough force to knock me off my feet. “Sadie is pregnant and I want you to take it easy on her okay? I know you want Chloe, and you love her, but Sadie is her friend and she’s going to be protective of her now that she knows what happened.”
I exhaled a breath, “Holy fuck, Dude. I’m…. that’s fucking awesome. You’re going to be a dad.” It was such a foreign thing to be saying. Cameron Jefferson was going to be a dad. It felt like just yesterday he was calling me to be the best man in his wedding. He nodded, “I know. I’m shocked and scared as hell, and that’s another reason I wanted to get rid of Scarlett. Sadie is going through some crazy insecurity issues. She’s all fucking worried about her weight, and if I’ll love her after she has the baby and it’s just like seriously?” I realized then that I was a piece of shit friend for not being there for him to vent when he needed it.
“I’m sorry for being a dick of a friend, Man. As soon as I get this shit with Chloe squared away we’re going out for beers.” I confessed.
“Oh don’t worry, Dude. You’ll understand soon enough. You're just in the beginning phases of love, but eventually Chloe will have weaseled her way so far under your skin you won’t be able to tell where your body starts or where hers ends.” Cameron was right, and while I had only known Chloe a short time I was certain I had no idea where she started, nor where I ended because when I looked at her all I saw was us.
Chapter Eight
No matter how hard I tried I couldn’t get Ryan out of my head or heart. I was struggling and Sadie knew it the moment she looked at me. Why had I made the decision to come down to the homeless shelter and volunteer today? I had huge bags under my eyes, and the eye drops I used to get rid of all the red, puffiness weren’t cutting it.
“Ryan’s been Cam’s best friend since forever, Chloe. If anyone can see through the bullshit front that he puts up, it’ll be Cam.” Sadie tried to reassure me but I was over it, past the events that had taken place. Now I was just trying to move on from the pain and let go of the memories.
Still my body could feel his touch and every time I moved I could still feel his brand on my pussy. He owned me and I allowed him to do so. Now I had to deal with the shit that I had caused myself.
“I don’t want him anymore.” I lied, slopping a scoop of corn onto a woman’s tray in the food line. I already knew Sadie wasn’t going to believe that, but maybe if I said it out loud I might start believing it myself. “Liar. Liar.” Sadie shook her head at me in disapproval. “Chloe listen to me, Ryan is a playboy. A man whore at best, but every good man whore has a weakness for a single woman in their life. Their soul mate, and I’m one hundred percent sure that you’re his, Hun.” I gripped the scooper harder than necessary and corn went flying onto the floor. I bent down to clean it up. “Well he ruined that, She ruined that.” Hatred and utter disgust for the woman that I now knew as Scarlett, seethed through me.
“He loves you. He fucked you in his bed. He’s never fucked anyone in his bed. It mean’s something. For as long as I’ve known him and as much as Cam has told me he has never even allowed a woman that wasn’t family to step foot into his home.” Sadie is saying this with so much certainty and force that it’s hard for me not to believe it. Perhaps if I hadn’t seen it with my own two eyes I could fully believe her, but I did. If he didn’t invite women into his house then how on earth could Scarlett have gotten in there?
“Just because he fucked me in a place he hasn’t anyone else, doesn’t mean shit. I realized I was nothing but another notch in his belt the moment that bitch showed up.” I slammed down another scoop of corn on a passing tray and tried to smile through my pain. I needed to calm down and get myself under control. This wasn’t the place to have a melt down, these people had it so much worse than I did and they didn’t deserve my piss poor attitude.
“Scarlett is, should I say was, an investor for both Cameron and Ryan’s companies. She’s nothing now, Ryan doesn’t want her anymore today than he did yesterday, or even last month.” Sadie seemed so convinced but I wasn’t, the look of distaste in that evil woman’s eyes would forever be burned in my mind. The way she looked down at me like I was nothing made me sick to my stomach. “I thought he loved me Sadie.” I confessed heartbroken. I didn’t know what to do with all the pain. Sadie pulled me away from the serving line, nodding her head to a few other volunteers so they would take our places.