Desperation Road

“Where’s the bag? I don’t care if this one’s better.”

The girl closed the book and walked over to the dresser and she began to open the drawers and show Maben that their clothes were nicely folded and put away. Maben took the child by the shoulders and said who told you to put those in there.

“I didn’t do it,” she said. “That woman did it.”

“What woman?”

“That woman that’s here.”

Maben stood up straight and looked around as if she were dizzy and then she told Annalee to put her shoes on.

“Why?”

“Just do it.”

Maben walked back toward the front of the building to the office. She walked slowly, silently. She bent down when she reached the office door and kept her head below the glass pane. The woman remained at the desk. She remained on the telephone. Maben listened. I don’t know what to do, she said. I found it unpacking her clothes. I told you. Should we call the cops? What do you think? I don’t know. Maben raised her head so that she could see inside and the pistol lay on the desk immediately in front of the woman. Maben sank down after she saw it and she snuck back to the child and told her to get whatever she could carry and let’s go.

“Why?” the child asked again and she started to cry. “I don’t wanna go no more.”

“Hush,” Maben said. “You got to listen to me and hush.”

“I don’t wanna go,” she yelled.

Maben yanked her and said I don’t care what you want. Get what you need to bring and shut the hell up, Annalee. I ain’t playing with you.

The girl quieted but whimpered as she grabbed a small stack of books off the dresser that the woman had given her. Maben opened the drawers and pulled out clothes and stuffed them into the duffel bag but the bag was small and half the clothes stayed. She then turned and knelt to the child.

“Listen to me. Listen good. We’re gonna go up here real quiet and go out real quiet. No talking. Go on out and wait for me on the sidewalk. You hear me?”

Annalee nodded. Looked away from her mother.

Maben grabbed her by the shoulders. “I said listen. This is important. You hear me? Do what I say. You hear me?”

“Yes. I said yes.”

“Come on.”

Maben tucked the duffel bag under her arm and took the child by the hand and they walked toward the front. At the end of the partitions Maben stopped and gave Annalee the shush sign and then she peeked around the corner. The office door still closed and the light still on. The mumble of a voice. Bend down, she told the child. They hunched over beneath the level of the glass and moved quietly to the exit door and Maben held it open just wide enough for Annalee to pass through. Wait out there, she whispered. And take this. She handed the duffel bag to the child and gave her a small push. Then Maben crawled over to the office door. The woman wasn’t talking much now but only saying yes ma’am or okay to the voice on the other end. Said I haven’t yet I wanted to call you first. And Maben knew instructions were being given. Knew there was no way you find a pistol at a women’s shelter and do nothing. Knew that as soon as she hung up the phone she would make another call.

She looked around. Then she crawled behind the counter and looked for something to throw. Looking for something she could throw far. Not a phone book and not a box of pens and not a paperback novel but on the middle shelf was a football and a baseball. She took the baseball and stood and she threw it toward the back of the building. It was a strong throw and it cleared the partitions and hit the wall above the bathroom doors. A solid whack. Maben ducked behind the counter and she heard the woman say hold on and the office door opened.

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