There’s a long pause.
“Just tell me where she is. Home? Working somewhere? I promise if she tells me to take a hike when I find her, I’ll leave. I’ll never bother you again.”
“Promise?”
“Swear on it. I want Andi back, but if she doesn’t want me…” I trail off. The threat of her not wanting me is enough.
“She has a show tonight. It’s an early one, five p.m. Don’t bother her before then, but you can find her at Rick’s bar after.”
“Thank you,” I say, the relief evident in my voice. “I owe you one.”
“Let me give you one recommendation: sort out whatever this misunderstanding is before you see her, because if she comes away worse for wear after you see her, I’m going to cut off your balls and feed them to the birds.”
I swallow, the image a vile one. “Understood.”
“Great!” she chirps. “Have a super day.”
Lisa hangs up, leaving me staring at the phone and fearing for my life a little—and the life of my family jewels. I figure the best course of action is to do what she says—sort out this misunderstanding, once and for all.
CHAPTER 47
Ryan
Jocelyn’s waiting behind her desk. Her eyes are the same icy blue I’ve grown used to, and they send shivers across my skin the second I walk through her door. I can’t understand what drives her to be so cold, so hostile all the time, but then again, that’s not my problem.
My problem is Andi, and getting her back.
“Beautiful wedding, wasn’t it?” she says as if nothing happened the previous evening. Straightening a stack of papers, she slides them across the desk. “You can get started signing these. I wasn’t ready for you today, but I can be prepared in a few minutes.”
I stomp across the room and rest a hand on the contracts. “Don’t bother.”
She freezes. Her hands cup the sides of the stack of paper. My fingers press down on top, and eventually, I win the battle, pushing the papers back toward her.
“Excuse me?”
“I have no interest in these.”
“I’ve raised your signing bonus.”
“Didn’t you hear what I said?” I repeat. “No interest in them.”
“We’ve come to an agreement satisfactory to both parties. A lot of time, money, legal support, etc. have gone into making this a possibility.”
“We had an agreement that worked,” I say. “But now there’s a third party, Andi. She’s the loser in all of this, and I refuse to let that happen.”
Jocelyn blinks, as if she’s not all that surprised by my demands. “I worried this would happen, but I think I can make you see some sense. Andi is not a loser in this scenario. By cutting her free, she’s able to pursue her own career.”
“Don’t twist my words around.”
“Andi is talented in comedy. I know—I’ve watched her videos.” She smiles, that smug smirk that proves she’s thought of everything. “If you don’t sign this contract, you’ll be back with the Stars. Yes, it’s a great team, and yes, I know you fit in well there, but what about Andi? She’ll have to give up her comedy career to be with you. Is that want you want?”
“There’s a market for comedy in Minnesota.”
She sighs. “You’re acting like a child.”
I’m silent. I don’t want Andi to give up her dreams for me, she doesn’t want me to give up my dreams for her, and that’s the way it should be. Unfortunately, our individual successes make it difficult to make a success of us, together, as a couple.
“I suppose you could try long distance.” Jocelyn shrugs. “I’m sure it works for some couples.”
Still silent, I’m fuming. I don’t want long distance with Andi. I want her in my bed, wrapped in my arms every damn night.
That’s when I have a moment of clarity.
I shake my head and take a step back. Suddenly, I realize she’s doing it to me, the exact same thing she did to Andi: guilt-tripping me into thinking everything I’m feeling, everything I want in life, is wrong.
“This is how you did it,” I say finally. It’s as if the sun has come out after the storm, and I can see the road I need to take. My destination is home, and home is with Andi. “You convinced her that being with me was selfish on her part.”
“I didn’t have to convince anyone,” she says. “I’m just speaking my mind and pointing out the obvious. I’m looking out for your best interests, Ryan.”
“No, you’re not,” I say. “You’re looking at the bottom line. You don’t know what’s best for me.”
“I know you. I’ve watched—”
“Yeah, yeah, you’ve watched every video of me playing hockey, of Andi doing her stand-up, but that doesn’t mean you know me. I’m sorry, Jocelyn, for whatever went into organizing these contracts, but I’m done. I’m walking away. It’s final. You can look for someone else to play your games.”
“These aren’t games.”
“Fine,” I say. “Call it what you want, but just know I’m done.”
“Who’ll be your agent?”
“I’ll stick with Lawrence, or I’ll find someone else. It’s not your problem.”
“Ryan!” She stands, and the stack of papers goes flying as her desk shakes from the sudden movement. “Don’t throw your life away.”
I pause in the doorway on my way out. “I’m not,” I say, my voice soft, even. I’m no longer angry at her, I just feel sad. It’s a pity she’ll never know why I’m doing what I’m doing.
I understand where she’s coming from, trust me—my priorities were different a few short weeks ago—but then I met Andi, and now things have changed.
“Goodbye, Jocelyn.”
“Fine.”
Her word stops me in my tracks. “Fine, what?” I turn to face her. “What are you saying?”
“I’ll sign you anyway.” Her nose turns up, her arms shaking as she rests her fingers against the desk. “If you’re this serious about her, then I will make an exception for you.”
“Exception?”
“Single players sell better. Better advertisement opportunities. The fangirls, the bunnies, the media go crazy for a hot young hockey player with a bright future, but I can make this work. Devoted young hockey player with a sweet, girl-next-door-type girlfriend—we can make this work.”
“This is my life, not a story for the media.”
“We can make it one. You could earn big on this.”
“You know what?” I smile, this time feeling free, finally free from whatever bullshit Hollywood, Jocelyn, and the old Ryan Pierce got roped into. “I love the game. I just want to play hockey, that’s all, but there will come a time when hockey’s not an option for me anymore, when I’m too old to be of any use on the ice, and when that happens, the world won’t care about me. Neither will the media, neither will the NHL, and neither will you.”
Her lips are a thin icicle, pressed tight across her face.
“Do you know who will be there if I’m lucky?” My heart pounds harder as I hope what I’m saying is true. “Andi.”
“But—”