At her mother-in-law’s suggestion, Madeline’s head snapped up and she stared at her with unconcealed shock.
“We canna afford servants here,” Bessy explained. However, something in her eyes suggested that that was not the reason she wished her daughter-in-law’s lady’s maid gone.
Madeline cleared her throat. “My father will?”
“It wouldna be right,” Bessy interrupted her. Then she sat down across from her, her eyes imploring as she spoke. “Ye did not come here because ye wished it, did ye?”
Madeline could not suppress a snort, “Who would want to live in such a decrepit house?”
A sad smile came to her mother-in-law’s face. “Ye’ve grown up differently than us or ye’d know that there are places far worse than this and people still call them home.” She leaned forward. “We are safe here. Surely, life is full of work, but it is peaceful. We are very grateful for the way Derek looks after us.”
Watching her mother-in-law intently, a woman who had lived a life so much different than her own, Madeline noticed the faraway look that came to the old woman’s eyes. As she spoke, her voice was soft, full of memories. “My husband died when Derek was all but ten years old. Ever since then, he has been looking out for us, shouldering burdens that no child should know.” Sadness and pride tinged her voice with equal measure. “And he still does, taking care of everyone, working himself to the bone. He rarely shares his burdens.” Blinking, Bessy turned her gaze to Madeline, hope shining in her eyes. “Maybe he will share them with ye.”
Madeline swallowed, strangely reluctant to disappoint this woman’s hopes. And yet, why would her husband confide in her if he did not confide in his family? After all, theirs was not a marriage of affection. It had been born out of a scandal no less!
“Ye do not look happy, my dear,” Bessy observed, her watchful eyes still fixed on Madeline’s face.
Not knowing how to reply, Madeline merely shook her head, sighing. What was she to say? How could anyone understand what went on in her heart if she herself was so lost?
“’Tis not this place, is it?” Bessy continued her line of questioning. “I’m certain ye’re used to fancier houses and workloads of servants, but ‘tis not the condition of Huntington House that’s the reason. Ye’ve been sad for a while now, have ye not?”
With wide eyes, Madeline stared at her mother-in-law, once more feeling as though the other woman could look into her very soul. No one had ever noticed. Or at least, no one had ever asked her that. Was she happy? She was supposed to be. And why would people not expect that of her, considering everything she had? Was she not one of the few fortunate ones?
Blinking, Madeline noticed a lone tear slowly running down her cheek and hastily brushed it away, embarrassed to have shown so much of her inner self.
Her mother-in-law nodded, a knowing gleam in her watchful eyes. “Ye’ve been miserable for a long time, haven’t ye? Only putting on a brave face?”
Madeline swallowed, her hands clenching around the hot cup as she averted her gaze, staring down into the amber liquid, small wisps of steam wafting into the air. Willing the lump in her throat back down, she wished she could simply vanish into oblivion. How had her life come to this? She wondered, a long, heavy breath leaving her body.
“Ye’ll be all right, dear,” Bessy whispered then, her voice certain as though she had already seen Madeline’s future. With a soft smile on her weathered face, she reached out and her work-worn hands wrapped gently around Madeline’s. “Maybe coming here will help ye smile again.”
Again, Madeline swallowed as she could not see how this was possible. After all, every change in her life had been for the worse. Had she not lost more than she had gained? Had she gained anything at all?
“’Tis your home now,” Bessy continued, gently squeezing Madeline’s hands, as her sharp eyes sought hers, “and we’re your family.”
For a moment, Madeline’s heart stopped as she stared at her mother-in-law. She could not help it, but despite the old woman’s kind smile, her words sounded like a punishment, a sentencing. Yes, they were her family now. She was trapped here, tied to them for life.
“Know,” Bessy whispered then, her eyes imploring, “that no matter what was before, we will stand by ye. Ye’re not alone.” Nodding at Madeline encouragingly, Bessy then rose from her chair and returned to the workbench, chopping vegetables as she hummed a sweet little melody under her breath.
Staring at her mother-in-law, Madeline felt a cold chill brush over her fingers now that Bessy’s hands had left, and for a moment, Madeline felt utterly alone. However, then her mother-in-law’s words repeated in her ear, and she wondered what it would feel like to be a part of their family. Certainly, her parents as well as Aunt Odelia had always been loving and kind. However, they had always followed their own idea of what Madeline might need and ought to be. Rarely had they paid attention to what she wanted and needed. Rarely had they seen her, mostly satisfied to accept the mask that Madeline showed to the world as the truth.
Why? Madeline wondered, sadness suddenly weighing heavily on her heart. Had it simply been easier? Had they not cared enough to learn the truth? Why was it that her new mother-in-law could see her aching heart with one glance when her own family could not? Not even after years of knowing her? Or had they seen her misery but never thought it right to acknowledge it?
“Drink your tea before it’s cold, dear,” Bessy’s soft voice reminded her before resuming the melody she had hummed before.
Putting the cup to her lips, Madeline inhaled the warm scent, utterly lost as to what to do.
What was she to do?
Chapter Fourteen ? The Fear of Failing
Over the next few weeks, Derek fell into a comfortable routine with his tenants. Most days he spent assisting them in restoring their homes, slowly getting to know them as well as their families. The barn had all but vanished, its wood needed to repair holes and splintering boards, now that autumn was well on its way. The wind grew chillier and the sun set earlier, cutting the days short and reducing the hours of light they could spend on necessary repairs.
Once the saw had been delivered, a few tenants had begun cutting down trees. However, so late in the year, they would not be able to rebuild what had been lost to the seasons of the past decades. Still, a sense of cautious hope hung in the air as plans were made for the following spring.
Toward the end of most days, Derek would climb to the roof of Huntington House and see to the many leaks and weak spots that had developed over the years. He worked slowly and carefully, systematically combing the slates for deficiencies, always ensuring sure footing as he took another step. Still, he could not help but notice his mother’s and sister’s fearful glances when they looked up at him. He saw the memory in their eyes of their father slipping on their wet roof so many years ago and falling to his end. Though he had survived the fall, he had never recovered, his body broken beyond repair.
Lost in thought, Derek caught sight of his wife as she stepped out of the house in one of her fancy gowns, a warm coat wrapped around her, and carefully weaved her way around the many puddles that covered the ground toward the small path that led to the pond. After sending her lady’s maid back home, she had slowly begun to help around the house whenever his mother would suggest a task. However, so far, she seemed unable to make her peace with her new home.
And yet, she stayed.
Derek could not help but wonder why.
As she had made it half-way down to the pond, Collin came running out of the house, chasing after her. “Maddie! Maddie wait for me!”