There was no one to help her. Only royals imprinted on animals and had the ability to shift into one when they reached their full power, and with her mother’s death, there was no one left to ask for help. She had only Kel and Teca’s attempts to explain how it worked in theory, rather than in practice, and her own bumbling failures each day.
The swans finished off the last of the bread and began to slowly swim away, lazily paddling through the still water. Her mind turned—as it always did—to the oncoming ambush on summer solstice. If Caedmon’s timetable held true, any minute now her scouts would be bringing her word that Bain’s army was on the move—if Bain wished to arrive across from Ristra by sunrise of the following day to draw her battalions out, as they’d been told to expect. The waiting was horrific. Every inch of her body hummed with the need to flee or fight, with no outlet except her training exercises with Kel.
When she wasn’t at the lake, they went over the plan again and again, hounding out every contingency, trying to prepare her for every possibility. In the end, no matter how much planning they did and how much everyone tried to help give her the opportunity, it came down to Evelayn killing Bain.
Her troubled thoughts were interrupted by the sound of someone approaching.
“I thought I’d find you here.”
Evelayn turned to see Tanvir emerge from the forest, the shadows of the Light Sentries and two priestesses sent to guard her visible just beyond him in the tree line.
“There aren’t many other places I would be.” She tried to keep the bitterness out of her voice, with little success.
“It will be over soon.” Tanvir stopped beside the log. “May I sit beside you?”
Evelayn nodded without speaking, staring out at the swans as they carved lines through the bright sunlight on the surface of the water. He stepped over the log and sat next to her, his presence filling up much more than just the space of his body, making her all too aware of the inches between his hip and hers, his legs and hers.
“Why are you doing all of this? Is it because of what you said? Why did you come find me today?” Evelayn suddenly asked, tired of pretense, tired of waiting and wondering. This—whatever was building between her and Tanvir—at least she could pin down. She could examine and try to understand it.
“Why, to enjoy the pleasant conversation, of course,” Tanvir teased but Evelayn just glared at him, and the smile on his face died. “What do you mean?”
“Did you notice me before … before all this?” She gestured to the diadem that she had to wear from morning until night, and all that it symbolized and encompassed. “I know you said that you … in the forest that day … that you … But I can’t help but wonder. Has someone been pressuring you to try and create a connection with me?”
Tanvir’s eyes widened, and if Evelayn’s emotions weren’t drawn so taut, she might have laughed. “Pressured me? To … to …”
“Because they are pressuring me,” Evelayn interrupted his unusual stuttering. Perhaps it wasn’t what she’d assumed after all then, based on his embarrassment. Or maybe he was just that good. “It’s not as if there is a massive battle looming ahead of us, or a fight that I’m terrified I won’t win to worry about. I’ve already been lectured three times this week alone on the fact that even though I am so very young, and it is extremely rare for any Draíolon to choose to be Bound to someone at my age, that as queen I have a duty to provide an heir as soon as possible. That I must procreate as quickly as I’m able, to ensure the royal line carries on, since there is no one else if something happens to me. And you seem to be a nice option, if I were the type to try and orchestrate this kind of thing.”
“A nice option?” Tanvir echoed.
“Good family, attractive, strong abilities. Orphaned by the war, so that we have something in common to connect over.”
“I’m glad to hear you think I’m attractive …”
Evelayn barely withheld a snort. “You know you are. So who was it? Kel? He let you come to get the silk so we’d have time alone—right? And he’s championing your plan. Is he the one?”
Tanvir cleared his throat, and glanced over his shoulder, reminding her that they had an audience. “Um, Evelayn … I’m not sure now is …”
She just waited until he shifted uncomfortably on the log.
“But then again, no time like the present to have very important conversations. With an audience.” Tanvir gave her a pointed look, but she just glared back. “Look, Ev, I promise you, no one has spoken to me about trying to orchestrate a, um, connection between us. And no one has mentioned the need for you to … uh … procreate on an accelerated schedule to me either. I know you are young, which is why I haven’t made my overtures any bolder than they have been. But I assure you that the interest I admit to having in you is purely selfish. Because I also find you to be attractive—in every way possible. Your mind, your strength, your will, and everything else, too. When I said I loved you, I was the only one saying it. Because I meant it.”
Evelayn stared at Tanvir. “Oh.”
Tanvir shrugged, his expression a comical mixture of contrition and alarm.
“Oh,” Evelayn said again, her eyes widening this time, flushing hot with embarrassment. “I’m so sorry. I assumed and I … oh my. This is …” She trailed off and turned away, before he could see the heat rising in her cheeks.
“Please don’t,” Tanvir said, his voice quiet. “I know you’re under immense amounts of pressure, and you have every right to be suspicious of everything and everyone. I picked a terrible time to try to … well, you know.”
“Create a connection with me?” Evelayn quoted herself, miserably horrified at the accusations she’d made so heedlessly. And after he’d told her he loved her, too. She really was quite adept at making a mess of everything.
“Something like that.” Tanvir sounded amused, not angry, and she braved a peek over her shoulder at him. His smile was like the sunshine breaking through a dreary winter morning.
“You’re not mad at me for questioning you so … bluntly? For … for doubting you?”
“Of course not,” Tanvir immediately responded. “Now I know you find me attractive. That is far more important than knowing if you love me back or not.”
Evelayn found herself laughing, something she hadn’t done much of since her mother’s death. It was an unexpected gift. Before she could stop herself, she bent forward and pressed her lips to his. He stiffened in shock but immediately softened, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her in to his body. Tanvir’s mouth was soft on hers, an unspoken promise of what was to come.
If they survived the summer solstice.
She broke away reluctantly, but Tanvir kept his arms around her, holding her silently as they watched the swans glide across the glassy water.
After a few minutes, Evelayn finally sat up straight, and Tanvir let her go.
“When this is over … when you succeed … may I formally call on you, Evelayn?” Tanvir glanced down at his hands and Evelayn felt something inside her drawing out, wishing to pull his gaze back up to hers.
“Are you asking to court me, Lord Tanvir?”