Crystal's Calamity (The Red Petticoat Saloon)

"Just because you needed more education didn't make you ignorant," Crystal said, incensed. "You had the ability to learn, just not the time."

"That's kind of how I felt about it, Miss Crystal, but my heart was broken clean in two at her words. I knew then she'd never marry me and I couldn't stick around and watch her marry another, so I up and headed west. I've never been back."

"Do you know what became of Lorelei?"

"Nope, I figure she married and had a passel of young'uns of her own to teach. She wouldn't have no problem finding a man to marry her, that's for dang sure," he said sadly as he drained his glass again. "My Pa passed on and left me the farm, but I never done nothing with it. Every couple years I send money to pay the taxes but it's likely overgrown and the house probably fell to ruins."

"You don't know that. You don't know anything for sure. Perhaps your Lorelei never married. How do you know she hasn't been pining for you these last twenty years?" Crystal suggested wistfully. "Or maybe she did marry, but she's a widow or something. She could be hoping and praying you'll come home someday."

"Aw, go on with you," Whiskers laughed, although the sound had a hollow ring to it. "You sure got a good imagination."

"Maybe so, but it could happen," Crystal replied with an endearing pout. "We could write her a letter," she offered. "See which way the wind blows. What could it hurt?"

"I done told you I don't know how to read and write," Whiskers said.

"I'll teach you," Crystal said, excitement ringing in her voice. "Oh, I'll write the first letter for you so we can get it out right away, but then I'll start teaching you. Mail takes quite a while. I'll bet by the time you get a reply you'll be able to write back yourself."

Whiskers set the glass down on the stand with a crack.

"Let's do it," he bellowed, slapping his knee. "As you say, I got nothing to lose."

"Good," Crystal laughed, clapping her hands. Getting paper and ink, she cleared a space on her dressing table. "I don't think we should be too pushy," she suggested, looking at Whiskers for confirmation. "Just a nice friendly letter asking how she is and letting her know you've thought about her often over the years. We'll be able to tell more when she replies."

"If she replies," Whiskers sighed.

"Think positive and remember, "Nothing ventured, nothing gained."

"You're right. How we gonna work this? Do you want me to come for lessons during the day?"

"Could you?" she asked, watching him intently. "Don't you have to work somewhere?"

"Ah, shucks. I do have something I gotta do during the day. You see me and my friend Henry are minding this mine for a while. We don't know when the fella that hired us will be back."

"What's his name?" Crystal asked. "Maybe I know him." Looking down at the paper, she held her breath.

"I don't reckon you do, ma'am. I never met him and Henry can't remember. He only knows the man promised to pay us good if we sat on the mine till he gets back. Guess he's worried about claim-jumpers."

"He should be," she snapped back furiously. "I hear quite a lot of that goes on around here," she quickly added, softening her voice.

Whiskers looked at her curiously.

"Maybe we should just forget the whole thing," he mumbled sadly. "Probably a foolish idea anyway."

"Oh no, we can't give up. I want you to do just as you did tonight," Crystal insisted. "We'll come up to my room and do your lessons here."

"But all the fellas…" he began. "They'll think we're…"

Laughing she leaned over and pinched his cheek.

"They'll think you're my favorite customer," she teased "and they might be right."

"Miss Crystal, you are the sweetest whore I ever met. Now I know why some men refer to you gems as fallen angels."

"Thank you. Now let's get started."

"Can I ask you something first?"'

"Certainly," Crystal replied setting the quill down.

"I was just thinking, there are a lot of fellas who could do with some schooling, you know, learning to write their name and such. Some can't read or write a letter to their folks back home and some can't add a column of sums."

"Sadly that's true, Whiskers," Crystal agreed.

"Well I was wondering if you might be willing to teach them."

"Oh, I don't know…"

"You see, Miss Crystal, the men got their pride and wouldn't dream of going to a regular school. It would be too embarrassing, but coming up here, well, that's a different story," he grinned. "They could get some learning and you would get paid without having to… you know," he continued gesturing toward the bed, his face red as a beet. "You look awful young and sweet to be a whore if you don't mind me saying so."

"Would they keep quiet about it?" she asked, considering it thoughtfully with a gleam in her eye. "I'd have to charge them and give Madam Jewel her share."

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