Yeah, I needed to get the hell out of there.
Hyped up, I moved quickly. My shoes slapped the pavement until they reached the parking lot. Hopping in my truck, I gunned it. Slamming on the gas. Go. Go. Go. I opened the window so I could breathe. Go. Go. Go. A sharp breeze whipped around me and jolted me out of the crazed reality I was swimming in. My hands gripped the wheel and my foot slammed on the brake as I skidded to a stop at the traffic light. Change. Change. Change. That burning red circle felt like a hot poker searing my skin.
Change. Change. Change. My eyes were shifting. Looking for signs of the oncoming traffic slowing. That’s when I caught a glimpse of myself in the rearview mirror. My shirt and face were splattered with blood. With one hand on the wheel, I yanked off my tie and wiped my face.
That’s when it hit me.
Killian can’t be dead.
Killian isn’t dead.
Killian will not be dead.
But even as I said it, I had a sickening feeling in my gut.
No. Tommy was fucking with me. This was a game to him. This whole thing was a fucking game. My frustration was escalating. My desperation to get to my grandfather felt so crippling that my hands were shaking.
The light changed and I didn’t hesitate to pound the gas. Back on the road, I pulled out my phone and hit speed dial.
“Brighton House. How can I help you?”
My voice was shaky. “Can you connect me to Killian McPherson’s room?”
“One moment please.”
It started to ring. One, two, three times.
Come on, answer the fucking phone.
Four, five, six.
Answer the fucking phone.
Seven, eight, nine.
No answer. I threw my phone at the windshield.
Weaving in and out of the lanes of traffic, speeding as fast as I could, I finally arrived at Brighton House.
My head was swimming as I bolted out of the car and ran into the building.
“Judy, have you seen him?” I asked, trying not to sound as panicked as I was.
She smiled. “Yes, he had a breakfast date with a nice younger gentleman.” She looked at her watch. He arrived over an hour ago.”
There was no time for niceties. I took off like a bat out of hell toward his room. Fuck, I left my gun in the truck. No time to turn around. My breath was coming in short, ragged bursts and my eyes were stinging by the time I reached his door.
I froze with my hand on the knob.
Somewhere deep inside me, the spark of hope I’d held onto the entire drive over here died.
What replaced it was a really bad feeling that Tommy wasn’t lying about anything and my blood felt like ice in my veins.
Images flickered through my mind.
A little boy in a Red Sox cap walking down the street and holding the giant palm of a man he wanted to be just like. “Understanding what it’s like down here will help you make better decisions from up there,” he said, pointing to a high-rise office building.
A child sitting next to a much-respected older man learning what a flush was, what it meant to fold, and what it meant to bluff. “The bluff is key,” he told me.
A young teen at the top of a mountain named Wildcat who had decided to walk down the mountain instead of ski down. “You have to conquer your fear, Logan—it’s the only way to survive in this world.”
I drew in a deep breath and pushed the door open.
My stomach heaved.
My body swayed.
My vision blurred.
Lying on his bed with his bloodshot eyes wide open was the lifeless body of my grandfather. On the floor was a pillow. Someone had smothered him to death.
I wanted to scream louder than I ever had in my life, but I knew I couldn’t. It had to look like he’d died of natural causes. The last thing he would want was a police investigation into his death—he’d had enough of those during his life.
It was my turn to take care of him.
Thoughts hummed in my head. My heart slammed against my chest. A sound leapt from my throat. I picked up the pillow. Made sure everything was in place. And then I threw myself beside him, pulled him onto me, and closed his eyes.
No. No. No.
No. No. No.
No. No. No.
ELLE
I know what they say about secrets.
That nothing good can come from keeping them. That they’ll eat you alive. That they destroy even the strongest of relationships.
All of which worried me because I was keeping one from both of the men in my life and the time had arrived to come clean.