Crush

I didn’t know what to say.

“It wasn’t long after I’d made my offer that we went down to the courthouse and got married. About a month later she discovered she was pregnant. I didn’t question who the father was. A baby was going to change everything. At first I thought the pregnancy would bring us closer together, but it didn’t. I found her withdrawing more and more. I tried to help her, but she wouldn’t talk to me. She stopped coming to work, said she was too tired. Then she started to disappear for days at a time, only to turn up hungry and exhausted. I never asked where she’d been. I knew where—to see him. I think that’s when I gave up on her. Turned my mind off to love and focused on my career. With a family, I would more than likely be able to climb the political ladder so much quicker.”

My jaw dropped and my body shook. “You took your tragic situation and made it about politics?”

“No, Elle. I took control of my life and tried to make something out of it.”

“Spin it however you want.”

“You weren’t here. You didn’t see the way she treated me, the way she’d talk to me. She had absolutely no respect for me or for what I’d done for her.”

“Why’d you let her stay, then?”

“She was pregnant. I couldn’t kick her out. I knew if I did, she wouldn’t take care of herself. So day after day, I endured all the crap she threw my way. After she had Clementine, things only got worse. By then, I’d stopped trying to make her happy. One day, out of the blue she threatened to leave me, take the baby, and run away with Tommy.”

“But Clementine was legally your daughter. Lizzy couldn’t just take off with her. You had rights too.”

He laughed. “Your sister didn’t care about the law. I knew there was a very real possibility that I could come home one day and find her and Clementine gone and that I’d never see them again. I couldn’t have that. Clementine meant everything to me. That’s when I went to someone for help who didn’t care about the law either.”

“What kind of help, Michael?”

“Someone who could offer Tommy the job of a lifetime.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Your sister used to tell me the oddest things, either during one of her rages or later, once she had calmed down. One time she had told me that Tommy wanted to be successful on his own and break free of his father’s hold. He really felt that his ticket out of the Flannigan shadow was the drug market. I knew this, and I used this information. Within hours of your sister telling me her plan, Tommy was offered one of the very coveted positions as wholesaler for Boston’s biggest drug supplier. There was no way he was going to leave town and give that up. And with him staying, I wouldn’t have to worry about Elizabeth leaving. This would give me a chance to get her help and for us to cement as a family. Or so I thought.”

Shock wasn’t even what I was feeling. “You’re an attorney, Michael. You uphold the law. Why would you even know a person who runs a drug empire?”

His eyes, so icy blue, had tears in them. “Elle, if I would have known that it was going to cost me your sister anyway, I would never have let Seamus back into my life.”

My heart was in my throat. “Who is Seamus to you, Michael?”

“You already know, Elle. He’s my older brother.”

My own shock finally seemed to register as I put it all together in my mind. Seamus ran Boston’s drug empire. Seamus was the Priest. Seamus was the one who’d kidnapped me. Seamus was Clementine’s uncle. The delivery boy was his son. Clementine’s cousin.

Oh God.

Tears were leaking from Michael’s eyes and he grasped his hands with his hair. “I can’t take it anymore. I just can’t.”

“Take what?” I screamed.

He flinched and words stumbled out of his mouth. “Ever hear of selling your soul to the devil?”

I didn’t know what to say to that.

“That’s what I did when I asked Seamus to give Tommy a job. I had no idea my political aspirations were so significant to my brother. It turns out, they were even more important to him than they were to me.”

I was losing him. He wasn’t making sense. I needed to pull him back. In a softer voice I said, “Michael, finish your story, please. What happened after you got Seamus to give Tommy a job?”

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